Rectum? Damned near killed him.

| February 4, 2012 | 18 Comments

This story has been “in the news” today and has nothing to do with TAH… except MOST of the folks who comment here might get a laugh out of it. I sure did.

From The Courthouse News Service:

 HUNTINGTON, W.Va. (CN) – A college student claims he was injured when a fraternity member in a “drunken stupor” decided “that it would be a good idea to shoot bottle rockets out of his anus,” and did so, “but instead of launching, the bottle rocket blew up in the defendant’s rectum, and this startled the plaintiff and caused him to jump back,” and fall off the fraternity’s deck.

Title and link stolen from Don Surber.

Sorry Jonn…

Category: Geezer Alert!, General Whackos

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  1. Marine_7002 says:

    Could it be that Mr. Hughes was testing a sure-fire way to get rid of hemmorhoids?

    Semper Fi
    John

  2. DaveO says:

    Let’s see:

    Explosions
    West Virginia
    Drunk frat bros
    West Virginia
    accident by falling off the porch
    West Virginia

    Yep…

  3. streetsweeper says:

    Oh….To be the first responding unit on THAT? It’d be a Polaroid OR Kodak moment. Simply, absolutely and fabulously fricking *priceless*!! ROFLMAO!

  4. ROS says:

    But did they find his head?

  5. Marine_7002 says:

    Wonder what effect that had on his family jewels. Darwin strikes again, hopefully!

  6. Mike says:

    The last words of a redneck are usually one of these: “Hey y’all! Watch this!” or “Here, hold my beer!”

  7. Street #3: I hadn’t thought that far along. Is there a first responder scrap book (or website) for this kind of thing? Kinda hope so. There are any number of “reality shows” that exploit this kind of thing. Until you mentioned it I hadn’t really considered the idea of a REAL version?

  8. Steadfast&Loyal says:

    wow

    future leaders of america.

  9. Yat Yas 1833 says:

    Having been a first responder, this would be a “you guys remember the call when…” call that goes down in fire department history!?

  10. AW1 Tim says:

    This moron is obviously a Don Rickles fan……. :)

  11. Bubblehead Ray says:

    I can hear Santa when this dickweed asked for bottle rockets for Christmas. “You’ll blow your ass off kid”.

  12. NHSparky says:

    $25K/year to learn how to “blow it out your ass”, quite literally.

  13. UpNorth says:

    Kid doesn’t know it, but he’s immortal already. He’ll be talked about over beers, in the lot behind the PD, FD and ambulance service, long after he’s met the big bottle rocket in the sky.

  14. NHSparky says:

    Didn’t we see that kidvin the opening sequence of Idiocracy?

    And yeah, mouth-breathers like him are inevitably the baby factories. FML.

  15. Doc Bailey says:

    and yet another reason the Herd always loses to WVU when they come to play.

    one question, which fraternity?

  16. Doc Bailey says:

    Oh question, was he trying to become a proctologist?

  17. Flagwaver says:

    As funny as this seems, I’m wondering what the hell happened to the guy who got his ass actually blown off… not the idiot who fell off the roof… And, if dude wasn’t asleep/passed out, did he go down and beat the snot out of the doucheweasel who had the idea?

  18. Spigot says:

    Exactly why the “Jackass” series of movies has the standard “These stunts are dangerous and are being performed by professional, highly trained stuntmen; do not attempt any of these on your own as serious injury or death may occur”.

    In fact, I believe I’ve seen this stunt in one of them…can’t remember which one of the three…only that it involved pyrotechnics and resulted in burns to the stunt-ers ass and family jewels.

    What Johnny Knoxville, Bam, Steve-O and the boyz can pull off is not exactly the same as a bunch of drunks in the ATO house can execute without incident.

    And as a bunch of my buddies at Southern Mississippi were ATOs, I can absolutely understand how this could have happened.

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