This blog has given me a lot of things, ranging from a wife to a full time job that beats any other job except Infantry Squad leader. And so a few weeks ago when I commented to one of our readers on something Patriots related, the inevitable outcome was a trip to Afghanistan. Now, how my love of Tom Brady morphed into a trip to a warzone is perhaps unclear, just trust me.
Either way, sometime this spring, I’ll be headed “over there” for a few weeks, if I ever get this Visa application horseshit filled out correctly. I am as excited to go as my wife is unhappy about it, which is to say a lot. I don’t know how much liberty I have in naming my benefactor, but since he mentioned it this morning, my thanks to HeadHunter Six for the opportunity. I will not be leaving before April 4 (more on that later) and will be returning before June, so there is your window.
Either way, what I am hoping is that someone out there in the Moronosphere that is our readership is either a PAO in theater, or knows a PAO in theater that wants to babysit and get some good press out of it. I will be writing an article for The American Legion Magazine (circ ~3 million) on my trip, and am completely leaving the topic open to see what I find. I would like to go back to Wardak and Ghazni to do a sort of “Six Years Later” thing on the area I served in. So, if any of you guys know a PAO, can you let me know? Perferably some sort of door-kicker unit, and a mech one at that, because my humping my fat ass up mountainside days are coming to an end.
For any prospective PAO’s, I guarantee you’ll never get a more sympathetic reporter. I have a CIB, I know how to brag about a good poop, and I don’t ever remember being offended by anything in my life. I also might wet myself (I am over 40) but you won’t have to drag my ass anywhere. You can just leave me in place. Maybe put some cones around me.
So anyway, there is your warning order. TSO is headed back to the stan, and taking all of you with me, in the horrific-writing style you have all come to know and detest.