Skyler Whalen, phony Marine becomes phony cop

| April 18, 2012 | 41 Comments

James sends us a link to the Marine Corps Times’ Gina Cavallaro reportage of the arrest of Skyler Whalen, who we discussed over a year ago when he was pretending to be a Gunnery Sergeant. Now it seems that he is pretending to be a police officer, and the cops aren’t amused;

An off-duty police officer caught Whalen wearing a badge, ballistic vest, handcuffs, radio and gun. Whalen said he was responding to a 911 emergency hang-up call. His fakery was clear, according to the police report.

Whalen fled in his Ford Explorer, then was stopped and taken into custody after admitting he was posing as a cop, the report said.

In his vehicle, police found the law enforcement gear, including a rifle and police department business cards with his name on them, the report said.

A passenger told Kingman police he believed he was on a real “police ride-along” with Whalen.

So do you think he’s finally learned his lesson? Well, according to his neighbors, when the police released Whalen, he went home and they saw him leaving in a Marine uniform.

Category: Phony soldiers

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  1. Claymore says:

    He clearly likes to play dress-up. I’m thinking his next costume will be courtesy of the Mohave County Sheriff’s Department, and it will be the first one he’s legitimately earned.

  2. Bobo says:

    As long as he wasn’t investigating a crime or attempting an arrest, isn’t this all just part of his freedom of speech?

  3. Jack says:

    Obvious questions pop into my mind like why not just enlist? But the answers are just as obvious.

    It seemed that at one time the fakers were almost always old guys who dodged service years ago but wanted the glory of service later in life. Now we have young candy asses who could enlist and go fight and yet they are already building fake careers are heroes.

    What will they be like in 30 years?

  4. Redacted1775 says:

    Why not enlist?

    1.He’s obviously retarded.
    2.He’s fat.
    3.He’s obviously retarded.

  5. rb325th says:

    What a f’ing waste of oxygen among some bodily fluids his father spewed forth. Seriously? Neighbors saw him leaving in a Marine Uniform aafter he got his ass bailed out?
    This kid ieither completely off his rocker or he is just plain stupid as hell.

  6. Hondo says:

    Well, lessee what we got here . . .

    1. Impersonating a law enforcement officer (at least a misdemeanor virtually anywhere, and possibly a felony)
    2. Fleeing from police (at least a misdemeanor virtually everywhere, and possibly a felony)

    And in Arizona, at least one of those apparently is a felony – since the basic article indicates it was a “felony arrest”.

    Given his history, I think Claymore’s right and this guy will have a new suit fairly soon – unless he bolts. I don’t think the judge will give him probation, given the charge and his past behavior. And I don’t think he’s got a prayer of acquittal.

  7. His momma needs to be “slapped upside the head” for having sex with her handicapped brother and conceiving this empty headed idiot. Sheyit! Can’t the courts make her control his daily clothing?

  8. Nicki says:

    He’s fat and he looks like he’s got the herp. What a FAIL!

  9. OWB says:

    Somebody needs to make sure that the prosecuters know his history of playing dress up.

    He should be assigned as a special detainee to Sheriff Joe, for sure.

  10. Hondo says:

    Can’t say for sure the prosecutors know yet, OWB – but the PD in Kingman, AZ, does now. (smile)

  11. Jacobite says:

    It’s Kingman, AZ, color me surprised, not.

  12. Anonymous says:

    My prediction is that the next uniform this character wears will be legitimate.

    A prison uniform.

  13. Yat Yas 1833 says:

    FINALLY, one in Az within striking distance!!! I’ll be making a road trip soon, very soon. This little piss-ant thinks he’s a peer of GySgt Charlie Phillips USMC (ret), he is sadly mistaken. Do I need to get a ‘poser’ tag from Az Game & Fish before going hunting? Time for “BAMCIS”!

  14. Right Rev Mr. Wolf says:

    In AZ? Why can’t he fake being border patrol? That might work…

  15. Anonymous says:

    The gift that keeps on giving

  16. UpNorth says:

    Yat Yas, no tag needed. These wastes of skin are like feral pigs, no tag required. And, my apologies to feral pigs everywhere.

  17. Hondo says:

    Yat Yas, let the Kingman PD deal with this assclown. He ain’t worth going to jail over – no matter how good it would feel to kick his ass.

  18. Melvin says:

    Which one of “The Village People” was this clown supposed to be?

  19. traebiz says:

    Oh my Frickin god! this guy would not make it past the yellow foot prints. Semper Fat!

  20. Yat Yas 1833 says:

    @17 Hondo, how about if I just beat him a little bit? Maybe they’ll (Kingman PD) give me the ol’ “you’re a bad boy just don’t do it again?” Somebody said it very eloquently earlier, “He’s obviously retarded”!

  21. NHSparky says:

    After all the defending and “he’s a good boy” posts from the last time, no fucking mercy.

    And YatYas, while I wouldn’t make a special trip for this assclown, if you’re doing a roadie to Vegas, Kingman is on the way, so that might work.

    Frankly, with the CCW laws in AZ, it’s only a matter of time before this guy’s carcass is found along the side of I-40 after trying to pull someone over or some stupid shit like that.

  22. Yat Yas 1833 says:

    Sparky, ya know i haven’t seen Gunny (a real one) Chavez in probably a year. Maybe it’s time to make sure he’s still alive and kicking? Do you mean Retard might be found with a .45 or maybe a .308 (same as a 7.62mm round) slug in his retarded a$$? Heaven forbid!!!

  23. Hack Stone says:

    Yat Yas, any chance you were at 3rd AAV 1983-84 or 1st tarcks 1984-86? I was a radio repairman with Tracks back then. Those were good times, the dollar was strong, and I was about 80 pounds lighter.

  24. Resident says:

    Here’s his latest escapade in Kingman

  25. NHSparky says:

    This’ll get a decent seed in next year’s dancefor sure.

  26. Ex-PH2 says:

    Oh, golly gee, fellas. Don’t you feel sorry for this poor, benighted soulless crap weasel?

    You’re just being mean to him. All he wants to do is play soldier. Doesn’t mean he really wants to BE a soldier.

  27. Mike says:

    Uhhh and why was he released? Last I checked impersonating a police officer was a felony. Nice work, cops.

  28. Sparks says:

    That’s not a herpes lesion on his mouth. It’s a hemorrhoid. Goes with his fat ass mouth, body and big head.

  29. Dorton says:

    I think this moron should be given a choice, either go to prison on a FELONY charge or have to actually enlist in the marines. My guess is there would be hell to pay for him when he got to basic and his DI’s found out why he was there haha.

  30. Hisgirl513 says:

    You know maybe he grew up in a fucked up house hold with a drunk dad and a drug addict mom maybe his neighbors are fucking crack who can’t even tell the cops there real names cause they have warrants out… Yea those are people to trust as a source… The guy in the passenger seat was a friend who knew exactly what was going on he was a dumb kid after talking to policeman from other cities about it they said I he had done it in any other city like LA they would have just confiscated his stuff and made him go home, it was prank, that a highschool kid pulled like three years ago and yea it is his freedom of speech he didn’t illegally acquire anything he had and he didn’t actually try to investigate he went no further then words I could say I’m the president shave my head an put a suit on does that put me in jail too????? Get the story straight stupid people

  31. Hisgirl513 says:

    An it’s not herpes it’s chew common in Arizona

  32. Virtual Insanity says:

    31 and 32,

    You know, many people grow up in bad circumstances but become great citizens.

    Many of them do that by REALLY joining the military.

    Not lying about it.

    Speaking of stupid people:1. this was a dead thread you revived; 2. You write like you’re on crack.

  33. Hondo says:

    Can anyone out there speak the dialect called “Ignoranti-Ranti”? I could use an assist in translating comments 31 and 32.

    I think I get the gist of it, but those two are kinda hard for someone who actually speaks English to follow.

  34. OldSargeUSAR says:

    This bedwetting moron and #32 might show up in your town dressed up as “Batkid”, and Batbitch… Be alert!

  35. Hack.Stone says:

    If Hisgirl513 is not aware when someone resurrects a long dead thread, I suggest that she check the Monkress Chronicles. That saga has more sequels than Die Hard and First Blood combined.

  36. 2/17 Air Cav says:

    Nothing says “Take me seriously” like nonsensical ellipses, an interrogatory with five question marks, and a few hundred words thrown together and devoid of punctuation.

  37. A Proud Infidel says:

    That boy looks like he has less than half the IQ of a toadstool growing out of a lump of cowshit!

  38. NHSparky says:

    Uh, hon? Impersonating da po-po isn’t protected under the First Amendment. In AZ as in most other jurisdictions, it’s a felony. And while wearing a uniform and claiming to be a Marine isn’t illegal within certain limits, it IS incredibly stupid.

    Kinda like you were for dragging this shit out of the closet after almost a year.

  39. MaybeNot says:

    You know you all right like dumbasses this was a crime committed two years ago already been dealt with haha and those of you who have never seen chew before you need to go to a small town or watch some kind I real small town or ranh kind of stuff haha he doesn’t have herpes and that lump will be gone within a couple hours of putting it in haha just sayin that would never fly as a real military picture because that would be like letting someone smoke for their picture. Anyway, it looks to me like he was just a kid playing dress up. Honestly I don’t see anything that is actually illegal consider he didn’t print any false documents or try to actually arrest somebody, however he probably got his ass kicked by some legit officers the person in 31 and 32 sounds severely dyslexic and if they are right then maybe he needs help for all we know…. Not many people grow up like that and make gret citizens. I mean of you walked into a high security prison and asked each inmate about there childhood it’s probably not very good for any of them; however that does excuse this kid but I feel that maybe he should be made to go into the military because at this point he would be given hell by every officer who knew who he was and he would have to endur all of the reality of it no more games and no more faking real life real war….. At this point I feel he has lost all respect from anyone and maybe the military can show him how to gain some back

  40. rb325th says:

    @40, if you are going to criticize people for “righting like dumbasses”…. I’m sorry, you just lost me right there. It is “writing” not “righting”, but you know that don’t you Einstein? The rest of your writing is so hard to follow due to spelling, grammar, and punctuation being tossed out the window that I have to conclude you either did not get past 6th grade or our countries education system is an utter failure.
    So the next time you want to call people “dumbasses” on the internet, find someone to do the writing for you.

  41. Green Thumb says:

    Maggot.

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