Mike Wilson compounds the douche-baggery

| May 6, 2012

You might remember Mike Wilson from when we discussed him last month. He was a secret squirrel First Lieutenant who looks like he’s about twelve years old. Well, you guys have been picking on him and, gosh darn it, he’s not taking it anymore;

Yeah, the reason we can’t find him listed anywhere is because he’s such special secret killer. We’ve never heard that before, have we? Yeah, the Army changed my name after I was discharged, too, but only because some retarded clerk can’t spell.

Anyway, Sporkmaster found some conversations from when Wilson sought solace in the arms of Breanna Manning;

I hope you feel better, Mike, ya turd burglar, you. And before you ask, I don’t know if these conversations took place before or after Manning’s incarceration.

Category: Phony soldiers

Comments (52)

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  1. TopGoz says:

    Stop it you guys, or I’m going to tell Mom on you! Then you’ll be sorry!
    Funny, I thought I read in there that Bradley Manning takes security clearances seriously…

  2. Mike Kozlowski says:

    …Awright, whoever came up with this one owes me a new laptop screen and a cup of coffee. 😀


  3. Redacted1775 says:

    What the little runt fails to realize is once he was outed and this started, it will never end. Take your medicine son.

  4. Ryan says:

    Wait, isn’t that Manning profile one of Powerpoint Ranger’s troll accounts?

  5. Marine_7002 says:

    The WHITE-WASHED list? Hilarious. Code Section D? As in Dumbshit?

  6. Redacted1775 says:

    And if you look, that particular incarnation of “Bradley Manning” is on “1SG(P) Steve Jordan’s Misguided Children” Page. It’s a network of trolls.

  7. Sig says:

    Yeah, the “Bradley Manning” guy is pretty funny, actually. Check out his info page.

  8. Old Trooper says:

    This fucking idiot needs his ass kicked. I like the “stop picking on me or I’ll take myself deep” bullshit he’s spewing. What are you; 12? “If I don’t get my way I’m gonna hold my breath”!

    You made this mess, so now you get to deal with the consequences of your bullshit. So; you were an O-2, eh? Funny, I know butter bars that wouldn’t wear their uniform as jacked up as you in your picture. Any, and I mean any, officer would never wear a uniform as fucked up as you do and if they did, they would take themselves deep out of being embarrassed to present themselves that way.

  9. SJ says:

    I don’t recall reading the source of his supposed commission. I’m guessing must be battlefield when the rest of his unit was wiped out?

  10. My name was changed when the guy from the Muppets sued the Army.


    Jim Hanson, not Henson you bastards.

  11. JustPlainjasin says:

    You guys better watch it he’s straight outta Compton! His cred before joining the military was pretty tough!

  12. Marine_7002 says:

    Damnit, have some sympathy for the poor fella. Or he might stick his cap pistol in his mouth and pull the trigger.

  13. defendUSA says:

    Bwahaaaa!!! The last time someone told me they were white-washed, I would find no traces anywhere, I found Steve Robinson to fix it.
    That is the biggest goddamned red-“I want a beatdown”flag you’ll ever see. Wow. I never cease to be amazed at the outright stupidity and narcissism of people who think they won’t be caught.

  14. Redacted1775 says:

    Wonder if being directed to this site so he can witness his own douchebaggery on display for all the world to see will push him over the edge…

  15. Marine_7002 says:

    @14 Redacted: we can only hope. But he’s too chickenshit to admit that he’s a liar and a fraud, so I seriously doubt that he’d have the cojones to do himself in.

  16. 0311 says:

    I dunno, I think he’s legit. Everyone I’ve ever known who had to have their identity changed and was placed on the super-secret white-washed list regularly posts pictures of themselves in uniform and lets random strangers know on Facebook that they totally did a bunch of secret squirrel stuff that they definitely can’t talk about so please stop asking.

    Oh, they all grow scruffy pre-pubescent methhead facial hair and wear guyliner too.

  17. Occupy Hell Hippies! says:

    Pfft, that is nothing. When I was was in I was like, Mecha-Artillery, I was like in a bipedal killing machine thing, but like I was so awesome with my 3 Ranger Tabs, 5 Sapper Tabs, aww yeah, I got Sapper 5 times. I did not need it, one man army and all. I was like, Soup Sammich but like even better, and real. yeah I had to get out. They made a new section to chapter out guys like me. Getting benefits is a bitch, The VA was like “whoa, you were never in, we do not have a record of you” And I was like, I knew I was like Black Secret Ops Solid Snake, but I am in there.

    True Story.

  18. Hondo says:

    “Code Section D” is the governing reg for those who were sitting on the bench marked “Group W” in Arlo Guthrie’s Alice’s Restaurant.

    Sounds more like this guy was “discharged” under “code section BS”.

  19. Hondo says:

    Oh, and by the way, “Wilson”: you want people to ‘leave you alone’? Then it’s time to put up or shut up. You’re bluff’s been been called, “fella”. Either prove you’re legit or be prepared to take some shit.

  20. Marine_7002 says:

    @18 Hondo: so it was THAT group!

    “…and he stopped me right there and said, “Kid, did you ever go to court?”

    And I proceeded to tell him the story of the twenty seven eight-by-ten colour glossy pictures with the circles and arrows and the paragraph on the back of each one, and he stopped me right there and said, “Kid, I want you to go and sit down on that bench that says Group W …. NOW kid!!”

    Time to sit on the bench, Mikey.

  21. Yat Yas 1833 says:

    Awww pooh baby, him fahh down n go doom! Mikey boy, all you have to do is send you’re DD-214 to prove you’re legit. Anything less is just proving us right, YOU ARE A POSER!!!

  22. NHSparky says:

    This is almost worth going back to the old neighborhood to look this douchenozzle up. ALMOST. And aspreviously stated, I’m pretty sure this little shitstain might have driven up the 710 by Compton in daylight, but that’s even pushing it.

  23. We had a lot of retard clerks in the old days of typewriters…I had my last name misssspilled many times…the lazyfucks wouldn’t go back and fix it most of the time. But, I kept the name I was born with…I’m sure some of my old commanders wanted to erase any memory of me because I was such a smart ass….

    Where do you guys find stories of these retards?

  24. Hondo says:

    Bingo, Marine_7002. As far as I’m concerned, our so-called friend “Mikey” can go have a seat on the bench for Group W – right between two father rapers. He ought to feel right at home there – just like being back in Compton, eh? (smile)

  25. Marine_7002 says:

    pownetwork.org has more on him:


    What a low-life, scum-sucking, bottom-feeding scumbag. He’s hardly old enough to shave, much less serve 6 years in the Army.

    Get a load of the DD-214 he posted. It has more blacked-out areas than London during The Blitz.

  26. Marine_7002 says:

    @24 Hondo: he was sentenced to a year in jail for stabbing someone, so perhaps he DID end up right between a couple of bubbas with bad intentions!

  27. TopGoz says:

    @24 Hondo: Nice Alice’s Restaurant reference….

  28. Get this, Y’all:
    I have made contact with a guy who called him out on Facebook. That young man, new Marine, or Marine to be, has had a back and forth with me as follows:
    I asked and this person replied:

    Well i will just tell you everything I can think of. We met in Northern California. He is 22 years old. He has been named Mike Wilson since I met him when I was 6, (i’m 18) He has never said he was military till about a year and a half ago. He actually was telling everyone he was in a cult. Not that he was in the military. He was sent to an all boys boarding school. He got out at 18 and his mother said he was living in Redlands California. Last time I knew he wasn’t in the military at 20. That is about all I know about him, at this point.

    And he added:

    Here are the reasons that I think that he is not military
    Seeing that he has always been mentally unstable since a young age and not physically fit, I would assume he would have never even made it through MEP. I know what they will let you go through there with and what they wont. (Just went in 2 months ago) Also everything is off with his uniform. He also has a lot of accomplishments for only being 22.

    If you really need me too I could actually probably get in contact. With his mother. And get more information. Hope something in here helped. Also he just said his last name was changed to Chase.

    I asked:

    I will, with your permission, copy and paste your things to me on to others in this interest. With or without your name.

    He replied:

    You have my permission. I’m going to be going into the Marines. I wan’t to go Recon, Or Military police. We are stretching for those jobs right now.
    So now, I will ask this guy if he can slip our link to the turd in question.
    More to come, I am sure.

  29. DR_BRETT says:

    No. 6 “It’s a network of trolls.” —
    and, a network of CLUSTER@#$%S (“Heartbreak Ridge”).

    My Goodness — this post is truly amazing !!
    Where, How, and Why do these funny critters originate ??

  30. Hondo says:

    Marine_7002 (@26): Couldn’t happen to a nicer “guy”. And he “lookth jutht tho marvelous” in that photo from the LA Times article that Mary linked to at POWNetwork! (smile)

  31. David says:

    RE Code “D”? Since “D” is the fourth letter of the alphabet, he must mean RE4…as in “there’s no way in hell you’re getting back in…even those who score under a 31 on the ASVAB have a better chance than you do”.

  32. Marine_7002 says:

    @30 Hondo: oh ya, he lookth like suth a thweetie. Actually, I think he was trying to project that “cold steely-eyed baby-killer” image that other wannabees like to show off. Pretty tough to do when you’re barely into puberty, however.

    Just wondering, has anyone put a link to this blog entry on his Facebook page so he and other people can see it? I can’t do it, don’t have Facebook.

  33. i made a video of mikey like i did for seteve cept mikey instead of growing a set and calling reported me to youtube for bullying and harassing my FB page has a bunch of nice screen caps STEVE JORDAN VALOR THIEF EXPOSED search it youll find it heres mikes video

  34. Jonn Lilyea says:

    POW Network has a bunch more stuff on Mikey.

  35. Redacted1775 says:

    And the douchebaggery continues…


  36. jester says:

    I have had much fun with this fella on facebook. It just became so easy I had to leave him alone. I started feeling bad. It was like kicking a puppy or squashing a kitten. Too easy and it leaves you feeling sad.

  37. NHSparky says:

    Then you’re not kicking the puppy hard enough.

  38. Thunderstixx says:

    What a puss this punk is !!!

    Even our stupid LT was built better than this idiot…

    Sheesh, needs a GI shower or something…


  39. SrA Tom says:

    I’m becoming more and more apathetic towards these sociopathic, narcissistic, wondertards. (I am NOT a licensed psychologist/psychiatrist so I cannot make definitive diagnoses.) My rage has subsided, and I’m out of threats. I can say, that the fuckshovels should be taken overseas to be used as meatshields for the brave men and women they have dared to shame.

  40. Green Thumb says:


    I feel you.

    They are like weeds. You pull one and then the next day there are three more in the same spot.

    It gets old.

  41. Sparky McNonRanger says:

    Wow, when asked in which capacity I served I just say I worked in the supply room! LoL! Who cares

    shhhh, I’m a loner Dottie, a rebel……………..

  42. the fallen says:

    Wow what a fag. For those of us who have really served you are my heros. However this man needs to look in the mirror. That is disgraceful.

  43. USMCRet12 says:

    Curious how these folks don’t realize that – no matter what -as many times as they post a fake profile (military poser) of themselves on the internet, it is somehow captured and will creep up in the future to haunt them? I’m curious to know if this kid is anything like Dylan Harris or Eric Klebold? Sounds like he’s about to snap at any moment.

  44. RS says:

    The Bradley Manning touch “I do download file, copy and data transfers” was epic…. I hope I wasn’t the only one to catch that!

  45. Mitch says:

    This dude could have been a great help in getting Klinger that Section 8

  46. O-4E says:

    LMFAO!!!…God bless Mathew Lange…

    That is some funny shit

  47. Green Thumb says:

    Extra pussy.