Bryan H Austin; sicko phony

| July 7, 2012

Ken sent us a link to POW Network’s post about Bryan H Austin, who was apparently flaunting his phony finery in Milwaukee Mitchell airport, wearing an Army ACUs uniform with Lieutenant Colonel rank, a special forces tab, as well as 82d and 101st unit patches. Apparently someone confronted him for ID and when he couldn’t produce any, he was taken into custody. It looks like he was using the stuff to get discounts and free stuff from well-meaning folks.

POW Network says that he also used his phony stories to move in with women and leach off of them until they toss his ass out. I don’t understand that. I have real stories that never got me laid, how do these phonies do that? But I never wore ACUs in the airport – with LTC rank.

But, apparently, after the authorities arrested him for the fraud attached to the uniform, they searched his computer and found 11 pictures to charge him with “Capture an Image of Nudity“, whatever that means.

I’m sure this will trigger a bunch of “I know that guy” comments when the post hits the search engines.

Category: Phony soldiers

Comments (617)

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  1. Stumpy Joe says:

    Here’s to the REAL loser assholes who fuck shit up on this blog, and that need to get REAL lives!

    Thanks to vets and active servicemen everywhere for preserving our freedom of speech so that we can continue to have this spirited conversation.

  2. Green Thumb says:

    The ticklemonster is back.

    Now he is thanking vets for allowing him to be a poser pedophile.

    When it rains, it pours.

  3. Twist says:

    Hey BH Austin, you might want to get used to this….

  4. Stumpy Joe says:


    Maybe you can tutor BH Austin on this subject since you are already so familiar with it. Didn’t know that you were a “ticklemonster” too. Just using the new vocabulary word that i have learned from Green Thumb.

    Seriously I think that Green Thumb was dropped on his head when he was a child or something. Still can’t figure out why he is such an incorrigible little twerp. Dude, get a life!

  5. Twist says:

    Of course I am familiar with it. I do this crazy thing called “protect my children”.

    “Didn’t know that you were a “ticklemonster” too.”

    Since you used the word “too” you are admiting being a pedophile?

  6. Nik says:

    “Dude, get a life!”

    That’s twice you’ve made such a suggestion that I know of.

    Maybe you should spend less time on worrying about whether others have a life and get one of your own. You’re the one who keeps coming back here.

  7. Dirt Bomb says:

    Maybe it Jonn L fault here! I mean that Jonn runs this blog using government money to run this site! And all you people support him and his lies!

  8. Green Thumb says:


    BH, you meant to say “Dirt Bag”.

    Much more appropriate, don’t you think?

  9. Twist says:

    “using government money”

    Someone doesn’t understand about revenue from advertisements.

  10. Nik says:


    I’m sure they’re too busy foaming at the mouth to pay attention to little things like facts and reality.

  11. Green Thumb says:


    He is about to be a recipient of goverment/tax dollars that will feed his pedophile ass in prison.

  12. Twist says:

    Yeah it sucks that our tax dollars are going to go to feeding, clothing, and housing this douche bag.

  13. Stumpy Joe says:


    I check in every once in a while here to stir the pot a little to see if you jackasses are still hovering over this irrelevant conversation. It just cracks me up to see how quickly you idiots descend on anything that is said here. This the best fucking entertainment I have found in years.


    I am not nor do I have any plans of becoming a pedophile ever. Since you are convinced that BH Austin is a pedophile that is where the “too” reference comes from. I know that there is no changing your little pea brains on that subject. Have fun “ticklemonster”

  14. Green Thumb says:


    I think you will be meeting a real big ticklemonster soon.

    And he will probably love the name Stumpy Joe, BH.


  15. Horse Apples says:

    Green Thumb needs to get his fingers out of his ass!

  16. Dr. Phil says:

    I heard I was needed on this blog. I want to find peace for Green Thumb and his turds.

  17. Stumpy Joe says:

    Green Thumb,

    How fucking dense and totally obtuse are you?


    I’ll repeat it for you five more times, so that when your mom reads it to your ilitterate pea brain that it might finally start to sink into your thick skull.


    Got it?

  18. Green Thumb says:


    Roger that, BH.


  19. Dr. Phil says:

    This show is going to be about Green Thumb and why his mother drop him at birth.

  20. Nik says:


    If your life is so desperate and poor that coming here and making people angry is the best entertainment you’ve had in years, I feel sorry for you.

    It also speaks to the kind of person you are…one that no longer matters.

  21. Stumpy Joe says:

    Green Thumb,

    Did your umbilical cord get wrapped around your neck depriving you of oxygen when you were born? Can’t figure out how someone can be such a true moron.

    If you think this ongoing diatribe of accusing me of being BH Austin is going to push me to reveal my identity, think again Moldy Thumb.

    What is the deal with you grunting the word “turd” all the time? Constipated or just full of shit beyond your mouth?

  22. Stumpy Joe says:

    Wow! That’s deep stuff there. Glad to hear your reasons for participating today. Thanks for giving us the deep insights on my personality. You must be a therapist. What a wake up call… I’m going to change my ways… so that I matter again. Nik you inspire me, and from this point forward your potent words will definitely be the wind under my wings. I am going to soar above the clouds once again. Thanks Nik, I Love You!!!!

  23. Nik says:

    With any luck, Austin will be giving it up to his cellmate. It’s the realization that he’ll be passed around for a package of ramen noodles that makes the fact we’re going to be paying for this shitbag’s upkeep worthwhile.

  24. Dr. Phil says:

    Nik it’s people like you that keep my show on the air.

  25. Stumpy Joe says:

    Nik you must be sitting on a sore ass the inside of some prison to know that Austin is being passed around for a package of ramen noodles. Do you trade ramen noodles for anal sex? Interesting currency you have there on the inside. Sounds like you are waiting for your turn to plunge your throbbing cock deep into Austin’s poop hole.

    You have an interesting idea of entertainment. Making the government pay to house inmates so you can ass fuck them for the price of a package of ramen noodles. You are one sick fuck!

    Was wondering what kind of ramen you guys trade, the ones in the cellophane bags or the fancy ones in a styrofoam cup?

    Stock up on the Preparation H!!!


  26. Dr. Phil says:

    Nik on this show we will pray for you!

  27. Green Thumb says:

    BH Austin is a pedophile.

    Enough said.

    Have fun while you can, clown, because lifers are about to have fun with you.

    Might want to lubricate that two-hole a bit. I hear it helps….

    Later, BH.

  28. Nik says:


    Maybe he’s only a pedo because he can’t get any action from those of his sexual orientation that are his age. Hell, he might be looking forward to it.

  29. Stumpy Joe says:

    Green Thumb is back! Missed you, man 😉

    So it sounds like you know what it is like to get dry fucked in the ass. Is it pleasurable or painful? Or is it in between like a hangnail? You know how a hangnail hurts but you keep messing with it to feel the pain…please fill us in on your experiences. Did you bleed the first time?

  30. Dr. Phil says:

    I believe Green Thumb that you are a child abuser yourself. We can talk about hurting your children if you want to on here.

  31. Green Thumb says:


    Weak sauce your are, BH.

    Loser, I was an Infantryman. I have been fucked in the ass so many times I do not even blink anymore.

    Unlike yourself, there wannabe BH. Get ready, poser.

    “LTC” Pedophile.

  32. Stumpy Joe says:

    Green thumb,

    I am not BH nor do I want to be.

    What’s up with the pedophile stuff? Pedophile where? You were a pedophile infantryman?

    Weak sauce, was that blood dripping out of your two-hole after your first dry fuck? Weak sauce is a good name for that.

    Again not BH here. Just a reminder.

  33. Ranger Rick says:

    Pedophile, Green Thumb is. I know Green Thumb real name now and the trouble Green Thumb is in at the moment.

  34. Green Thumb says:

    As I said BH, weak sauce.

    You are not even original.

  35. Ranger Rick says:

    Green Thumb hurting children come on your no better than anyone else!

  36. Stumpy Joe says:

    Green Thumb,

    Weak sauce, as in blood dripping from your ass after a hard long dry ass fuck?

  37. Stumpy Joe says:

    Yawn rhymes with fawn.

  38. Oprah says:

    Now Gentlemen, with all this talk about your wee wees and bottoms, I believe that you all have unresolved childhood issues.

    Therefore, I would like to offer you a book from my Oprah’s Book Club. It is called, “SHUT THE FU*K UP, GOD DAM IT, YOU FU*KING GUYS ARE KILLING ME, GEEZE US FU*KIN’ CHRIST, PLEASE, STOP IT NOW”

    I hope you enjoy reading this wondefully inspiring book.

    Thank you, from your friend Oprah!

  39. Ranger Rick says:

    I need to get a copy of that Oprah thanks!

  40. Twist 2 says:

    The state case is headed to trial as of today’s status hearing. And depending on what happens with that, the federal DA will step in on the military impersonation and other federal charges.

  41. Green Thumb says:


  42. Another one says:

    Yeah, and if he thinks he’ll be able to sweet talk a jury once they bring in character witnesses, he can keep dreaming. Ex-wife #1? Ex-wife #2? Soon-to-be ex-wife #3? The woman he was was victimizing he was caught impersonating? The other ex-girlfriend? Ex-friends? Even family who he’s wronged?

    Even Santa can’t deliver that!

  43. Another one says:

    Yep, the court demanded a physical address.

  44. Zebra Stripes says:

    Green Thumb read Oprah book, and Twist 2 go back to reading law, because you don’t have a clue to what your saying anyways.

  45. Ranger Rick says:

    Another one I know where you live too.

    • Hondo says:

      For what it’s worth: Zebra Stripes and Ranger Rick are the same individual.

      Sock puppets ain’t cool, dipstick.

  46. Ranger Rick says:

    Hondo don’t worry we tracking you too.

  47. Green Thumb says:


    The only tracks you will experience, you will not see because they will be left on your backside.


  48. Hondo's Brother Dick says:

    Green Thumb, I heard you were good on your back. You and my brother Hondo have been butt buddies for quite some time. Loser, are you in 2nd grade?