Chelle Lynne Anderson-Tesla; female pretender pilot

| November 5, 2012 | 409 Comments

Meet Chelle Lynne Anderson-Tesla who is currently a major in the Civil Air Patrol in Virginia and assigned to HQ, VA Wing as Director of Aerospace Education. She got that job because she represented herself as combat-wounded Army Aviation Captain, and a UH-60 Blackhawk pilot. Of course, she’s here on TAH, so you already know that none of that is true.

She was a PFC Air Traffic Controller for less than two years;

I don’t know how she got a Good Conduct Medal with less than 3 years service, but there it is.

She claims that she earned a Purple Heart when her Blackhawk was shot down in Iraq and, of course, because of that incident she claims she suffers from TBI and PTS. but, as her records show, she’s never been to Iraq;

She also claims that she had enlisted time before she went to OCS. So, I thought I’d give her time to prove that to her unit who has confronted her with this information, in case the NPRC’s records were deficient. But I’ve just heard that she’s resigning from CAP “because of all of the politics” which means there won’t be any proof forthcoming. So mainly, this post is to prevent her from pulling the same scam in another state when it hits the search engines.

ADDED 11-13;

Category: Phony soldiers

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  1. Bostonian0311 says:

    Any mechanism to make sure the feds or the state police investigate her? A slap on the wrist from or getting booted out of a civilian non-profit group isn’t exactly harsh punishment and most certainly doesn’t stop this obviously sick, sick land-manatee from doing this again and again in other organizations or just parading around in uniform elsewhere.

    If the police or feds get involved, an actual criminal charge would bring some consequences to her actions. As it stands right now, other than the great guys at TAH outting her on the internets, she’s not going to feel much of anything from all this. She’ll just add a new name to her moniker “Chelle Anderson-Obama” and move on to another organization or group of unwitting people.

    What do we do to stop that?

  2. Twist says:

    It would be awsome if somebody could “procecute” the tundra wookie.

  3. LebbenB says:

    @100. I was a wide body when I went through OSUT in 83. The days I spent as rear roadguard made a deep and lasting impact on young PVT LebbenB. If it weren’t for coffee and Copenhagen I’da never made through.

  4. LebbenB says:

    I just realized we’re over a hundred posts on this one. I think she’s a lock for next year’s tournament. The only thing that would make it better is if she or her sockpuppet were to show up here and “defend” her record.

  5. This Guy says:

    Can’t wait for a good nickname. Ballduster McSoulpatch is already taken, dammit.

  6. Bostonian0311 says:

    @105: Private First Major Land-Manatee

  7. Lucky says:

    Having been a cadet and senior member in VA Wing, this shit is rampant in CAP here

  8. This Guy says:

    #106: I dunno who you are, but I like the way you think!

  9. LebbenB says:

    Manatee McFakehawk

  10. Nik says:

    Manatee McBlubberCheeks

  11. ChosenOne says:

    #106 very nice.

  12. RE:#106:
    Knock it off, just knock it off. I live in Florida and the Manatee is our friend. We don’t need to denigrate the nice mammal by claiming them to look like this “Mike Moore Relative”.

  13. This Guy says:

    Michelle “Purple Blackhawk” Anderson?

  14. CAPCapt says:

    @MCPO USN NYC (Ret.):

    Of course, you are correct.

    As I’ve said, every time I hear about stupidity like this coming from within the ranks of CAP, it makes me cringe, to put it mildly.

    When I’ve been on a military base (of any service) in CAP uniform, I am painfully aware of the reputation of CAP in some military circles because of BS like this…I feel almost like apologizing to the military for the transgressions of some of CAP’s bad actors.

  15. MCPO NYC USN (Ret.) says:

    @ CAP Capt. Rog that on all!

    BTW the CAP is on scene here in NY and NJ flying missions in support of Recovery. They do everything from mapping, photo recon, security patrols, logistics mission, and more. My newphew is in the CAP at at the age of 13 got his glider rating and about to test out on single enhine private. Great ORG … snap it off in her dump truck!

  16. LebbenB says:

    Slingload Crashhawk?

  17. Jorge says:

    @PH2 #73 Why, yes they are :-) Enjoy. I recommend the downloadable versions of the Headstarts. The servers sometimes hiccup. If you are interested in a particular language, let me know. Part of my job down here is researching the good free language stuff.

  18. VA CAP Member says:

    Her direct report in VA Wing CAP has been provided with this link and I know him personnally. He will take this very seriously.

    The wings may be for one of our Emergency Services qualifications such as being a Mission Observer or Mission Scanner.

  19. Joe Schmuckatelli says:

    Those are Army pilot wings. This has been determined from multiple pictures. There is no record in Ops Quals of her being qualified as MS or MO.

  20. MCPO USN NYC (Ret.) says:

    @ 119 … Any relation to Seaman Schmuckatelli? There was at least one on each ship I ever rode!

  21. Mary @ POWNetwork deserves the lion’s share of the credit (obtaining the FOIA request), and Jonn here at TAH for running with it.

    There were some (many) inconsistencies in this lady’s story and some folks from VA Wing CAP started asking questions of “those in the know” on things Army. And it went from there.

    Odd that you’d be an Army Aviator and not have a single photo from flight school, your unit, have any “Army buddies” as friends, etc, on your Facebook.

    Nevermind that female Aviators are a small enough subset of Army Aviation and wounded female Army Aviators are even fewer. Then there was the cross checking of UH-60 accidents in Iraq. No Class A or Class B accident reports seemed to fit the bill. None. Nada.

    And then there was just the unending stream of BS on Facebook, Twitter and no doubt “in person.” And cadets just lapping it up. “Oh, wow, ma’am, you’re a decorated Army Aviator who was wounded!”

    From experience: cadets, sadly, do not have any kind of military background to have a BS filter yet. They’re teenagers who are learning about military core values: Integrity, honesty, duty, respect, loyalty, honor, etc. (Things pretty near and dear to TAH reader’s hearts, right?)

    But they just don’t know enough to separate the wheat from the chaff. When presented with a “wounded veteran” they’re not going to say “really? Bust out your DD-214, ma’am, before I’ll listen to you.” No, they think “CAP Captain, decorated, wow..” and listen to the tales of derring do. That are all made up. Out of whole cloth.

    And that is why people took the time to track down this info: Some are vets, some have never served, but all have experience in a uniform of some sort or another (amazingly so) and have worked with cadets and know that cadets need to be taught and led by people who actually do possess and embody the traits they’re learning: Integrity, honor, selfless service, duty, respect, honesty, candor.

    The search for legitimate records was made difficult by a lack of information: service dates, actual last name when served, etc. You *can* request records under FOIA, but as you see, they’re heavily redacted and/or summarized.

    Request after request came back “No information found”. This, of course, can mean anything: The wrong identifying info was submitted, or there actually is no record of this person because they never served (it is hard to “prove a negative” in this case).

    Remember, too, that people who do this kind of fakery get by in the margins: their story is “sort of right” and without all the info a random person might be unwilling to just call someone out with just a hunch. So they skate on.

    It wasn’t until _several_ folks in CAP, both in Virginia and on Facebook, noticed the Purple Heart, the “crashed in Iraq” narrative, and any number of other inconsistencies in the story that someone started asking harder questions.

    Experience has shown that when you poke a story like this with a stick it usually falls apart, and this one did, too. After that it was a matter of lining up the evidence to confirm the supposition (difficult, as outlined above). Nobody wants to call someone who is legit a liar, so you always want to be sure.

  22. ChosenOne says:

    Well, she does have Army friends on FB. Her old profile had a pic of her in the left seat (not right) during a helicopter flight (so we know she wasn’t the pilot).

    Her ex husband said she was hurt very bad in the Army bit wouldn’t say much more.

    Her CAP commander says she is as dumb as a box of rocks and was going to be fired from her position anyways.

  23. ChosenOne says:

    *right seat, not left. <—- That's what I meant. Sorry. Left would make her the pilot. Oops!

  24. Joe Schmuckatelli says:

    @ #123 – The primary pilot sits on the right in helicopters.

    @ #95 – She’s 5’9″ and weighs 180. I’m 5’10” and weight 180. Does that tell you anything? They call them Bremaloes up in the Puget Sound area – Bremerton Buffaloes.

  25. ChosenOne says:

    #124 – How the hell do you know how tall she is and how much she weights?!

  26. MCPO USN NYC (Ret.) says:

    @ 125 … With a name like Joe Schmuckatelli … of course he knows everything!

  27. Anonymous says:

    to vawg

    Maj. Tesla will not be able to perform her duties as the VAWG Director of Aerospace Education for the next month or so. LtCol. **** ***** will be the Acting DAE during this period. This change is effective immediately and will be in effect until further notice. Please contact LtCol. ****** for any AE issues or questions.

    ****** * ******
    LTCOL CAP
    Chief of Staff
    Virginia Wing
    Civil Air Patro

  28. Nik says:

    @121

    “They’re teenagers who are learning about military core values: Integrity, honesty, duty, respect, loyalty, honor, etc. (Things pretty near and dear to TAH reader’s hearts, right?)”

    And that’s the real, sad betrayal. This kids are supposed to be learning things about honor and integrity from someone who clearly has none.

  29. ChosenOne says:

    Anyone know if the suicide rumor about her is true? It happened yesterday.

  30. TG2 says:

    @129, what “rumor” was it you heard?

  31. Anonymous says:

    No, she did not commit suicide. It’s hard to commit suicide while also posting under the moniker “ChosenOne”.

    Also, she is no longer a member of CAP. Well done, TAH.

  32. TG2 says:

    @131 correct about not having committed, however not because of supposed posting as chosenone, that post-er does not read as her.

  33. Ex-PH2 says:

    @117 — Jorge, my thanks for that! I will sign up for them. I just didn’t want someone from DoD sniping at me for wanting to learn other languages and/or keep up with language skills (although my Spanish accent does sound very Mexican, but that’s what I get for listening to las mamis en el autobus.) Muchas gracias.

  34. Yat Yas 1833 says:

    Ex-PH2: does PH2 stand for Pilot, Helo, 2nd Class? I mean if a PFC can be a helo pilot, why not you?!

  35. Ex-PH2 says:

    PH2 stands for Photographers Mate Second Class (E-5).

    It has now been changed, for no good reason, to Media Specialist :PP which takes all the romance and fun out of it. I mean, Media Specialist sounds like someone sitting at a desk, not like someone embedded in a Combat Camera Group.

  36. Yat Yas 1833 says:

    Ex-PH2: since the Navy didn’t trust us, Jarheads, with our own Chaplains or PHs I know what you’re saying. Any time they wanted a “Dog & Pony” for the media, it was always sailors there with the cameras. A good 50% of the time it was WAVEs. I gotta admit none of them were as hot as you!?;)

  37. Ex-PH2 says:

    Yat, that picture was taken in 1969. I’m not quite that young and self-involved these days.

  38. SSG Michael Cox says:

    Stolen Valor is in the Army as well !!!!!! A good example is the awarding of the Bronze Star for {EVERY MERITORIOUS ACT THAT IS NOT COMBAT!!} TO ALL YOU SORRY PECKER HEADED BRASS… JUST BECAUSE YOUR IN THE COUNTRY IT DOESN’T MEAN YOUR IN COMBAT!!!! THE LEADERSHIP THINK THE ONLY BRONZE STAR FOR COMBAT IS THE ONE WITH V_DEVICE. PUT THEIR BRAINS IN A FROG -IT WOULD HOP BACKWARDS !!!THEIR IS MERITORIOUS SERVICE OR ACHIEVEMENT IN COMBAT NUMB-NUTS !!!

  39. SSG Michael Cox says:

    Stolen Valor is in the Army as well !!!!!! A good example is the awarding of the Bronze Star for {EVERY MERITORIOUS ACT THAT IS NOT COMBAT!!} TO ALL YOU SORRY PECKER HEADED BRASS… JUST BECAUSE YOUR IN THE COUNTRY IT DOESN’T MEAN YOUR IN COMBAT!!!! THE LEADERSHIP THINK THE ONLY BRONZE STAR FOR COMBAT IS THE ONE WITH V-DEVICE. PUT THEIR BRAINS IN A FROG – IT WOULD HOP BACKWARDS !!! THERE IS MERITORIOUS SERVICE OR ACHIEVEMENT IN COMBAT NUMB-NUTS !!!

  40. Hondo says:

    SSG Cox: we get it that you have the proverbial “hard-on” for the way the BSM is currently awarded. However, your bringing up the subject in comments to this article makes no sense whatsoever.

    Regarding your apparent point: if you’ll bother to actually read AR 600-8-22, you will find that there is no requirement for direct participation in ground combat for award of the BSM for service or achievement. There never has been. All that is required is service or achievement “in connection with” combat operations, plus (since 2001) receipt of combat/imminent danger pay. Recognizing award of the BSM for valor in combat is precisely why the V device is used by the Army – e.g., to identify those who earned their BSM due to valorous acts vice by service or achievement.

    And as for that “just because your (sic) in country doesn’t mean your (sic) in combat” comment – yeah, right. Tell that to all those on installations in Iraq or Afghanistan who were wounded on-base by direct or indirect fire – or to the NOK of those killed on-base by direct or indirect fire. A fair number of such casualties happened while and where I was deployed. Neither IDF or direct fire care if you’re inside or outside the wire. If you’re getting shot at, you’re serving in combat – inside or outside the wire.

    Bottom line: you’ve voiced your opinion, as well as shown your ignorance. You probably should give it a rest for a while.

  41. LebbenB says:

    @138/139. Have you considered Decaf?

  42. Yat Yas 1833 says:

    @ 137: Ex-PH2, you were a hottie then and you’re still a hottie to us old guys!!! ;)

  43. Redacted1775 says:

    A Bronze Star is awarded for acts of heroism, acts of merit, or meritorious service in a combat zone. For (heroic) actions in combat, it is awarded with a combat distinguishing device, also known as a “Combat V”. This is common knowledge. Now, if someone was awarded a Silver Star for acts of merit or meritorious service in a combat zone when the SILVER STAR is reserved for gallantry in action against an enemy of the United States, you might have something to whine about. Put succinctly: what Hondo said.

  44. Ex-PH2 says:

    @142 — YatYas, you are an incorrigible flirt. I could just eat that up with a spoon. You’re not so bad yourself, you know.

    OK, I have to do something in return. Can you use cupones de descuenta? I have a bunch I can send to you.

  45. Ex-PH2 says:

    @117, Jorge, if you can find a site that offers free lessons in Latin, which I need for a book, that would be wonderful. Thank you!!

  46. OWB says:

    Still not appropriate for this particular topic, but I can assure any who doubt that there were plenty of times while in DS/DS/DS that I felt more than a little bit vulnerable. No, I am not a combat vet. Yes, I got hazardous duty pay. We were close enough that we were sometimes within range of some serious stuff, depending. Mostly we were not. But, we constantly looked across a scrawny fence which camels broke down easily at a public highway which was accessible to any fool who might take a notion to lob (no mechanical launching device necessary) something deadly at my sleeping tent.

    No, I was not terrified at the prospect, but I can tell you that I slept more soundly sacked out on the “conferance table” at my work station than in my sleeping tent just because it was more difficult to access. Had an incident occurred at our location, there could easily have been individual actions which warranted some super hero awards in spite of our not being at the front.

    We were awarded none for things which happened on our little base because after all was said and done, nothing happened which warranted it. But a few members got them for actions they were involved with at forward locations. And the few infiltrators that we had were neutralized in short order.

    So I remain grateful that I was not in a situation where I might have earned one.

  47. Anonymous says:

    ATC huh? Certainly looks like shes successfully landed a quite a few cheeseburgers in her gullet.

  48. Kato811 says:

    Shit that there is proof Dallass Wittingfeld procreated. :)

  49. Anonymous says:

    Where is the proof that she has “she represented herself as combat-wounded Army Aviation Captain”?

  50. Jonn Lilyea says:

    Do you really want me to bring that out? Because I have screen shots. You know I do.

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