Do Marines have weight standards?
November 19th, 2012
Old Grouch sends us a link to this fellow who seems to be in competition for the “Roundest Marine” with our old buddy the “Round Marine“. It entirely possible that Romeo Martinez was a Marine at one time, but I doubt very much that he was ever a lieutenant of Marines.
Another possibility is that he may have swallowed whole a lieutenant, or there’s a lieutenant buried in one of his chin folds;
It’s reassuring that there’s someone for everyone.
No one gets a USMC tat without having actually been a Marine, right?
November 19th, 2012 at 10:23 am
You must warn people, Jonn. Good thing I haven’t had breakfast yet.
November 19th, 2012 at 10:26 am
Yet another person that is devestated by the loss of Hostess.
November 19th, 2012 at 10:47 am
ANALYSIS
1. Bottle of Colt 45 Malt Liquor = Marine Juice.
2. Smashed IPhone = Killer’s Rage.
3. Close Cropped Beard = MARSOC.
4. Filthy Apartment = Living with Indigenous Population.
5. IPhone Ear Plugs = Listeniong to Next Mission Assignment Before it Self-Destructs.
6. Marine Surrounded by Women = Marine SURROUNDED by Women.
7. Wearing Female Clothes and Photographing Same = DADT Repealed.
REAL DEAL
END OF ANALYSIS
November 19th, 2012 at 10:47 am
Wrong fuggin’ answer, Romeo. The placement of the 2dLt bars are INCORRECT. They are worn horizontally on the collar, “parallel to the deck” not vertical on the collar -and Marines don’t wear their covers indoors, unless on duty and under arms. And yes, there IS a weight requirement for Marines! (What the f–k is he wearing in the 3d picture?)
November 19th, 2012 at 10:53 am
@4 I do know that what he is wearing has reached it’s maximum cargo capacity.
November 19th, 2012 at 10:56 am
Just for the record … I love the USMC … they are my brothers and sisters. I can not stand this POS! The above satire is intended to MOCK not OFFEND!
November 19th, 2012 at 10:58 am
Check out this pic!! DO the Marines allow pot? I don’t think so!
https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=235890736538597&set=a.107515316042807.5879.100003530171432&type=1&theater
November 19th, 2012 at 11:02 am
@6
Understood. I don’t speak for all Marines, but I didn’t take offense.
I do need to offer a correction, though. On number 6. It should read as:
6. Marine Surrounded by Women = Women SURROUNDED by Marine…and it looks like he may have one or two more tucked away in his gullet.
November 19th, 2012 at 11:11 am
@6 – No offense taken, MCPO. I’ve been around this blog long enough to be able to make a distinction of what is insulting and what isn’t, and even the tongue in cheek comments. What urks me about this POS is evident… he’s wearing a uniform he isn’t entitled to, and has been worn by those who have earned it and make significant sacrifices. Sadly, that means little to those outside this blog and who haven’t shared the camaraderie we have in uniform, but the rest of you know where I’m coming from.
November 19th, 2012 at 11:11 am
Nice back fat.
Effectively absorbs enemy rounds when fleeing.
November 19th, 2012 at 11:26 am
He kind of looks like a JROTC Cadet getting a little out of control. He doesn’t look all that old.
November 19th, 2012 at 11:26 am
I’m an army guy and love to bust on the Marines just as much as the next soldier, but this is no joke. I hope those who are actual Marines apply their expected level of corrective action to this person. YIKES!
https://www.facebook.com/romeo.martinez.35/photos_albums
November 19th, 2012 at 11:29 am
Maybe he’s trying to be the modern-day equivalent of Vincent D’Onofrio’s “Leonard Lawrence/Gomer Pyle” from Full Metal Jacket.
Someone needs to notify Gunny Ermey. I can hear him now “You are a disgusting fatbody, Pyle!”
November 19th, 2012 at 11:31 am
U.S. MARINES tape goes over the LEFT pocket there, douche bag.
November 19th, 2012 at 11:33 am
He’s a little too sweet looking to be a Marine. DADT and all that.
November 19th, 2012 at 11:34 am
And … yes he is from NYC … looks like Brooklyn base on Facebook evidence.
November 19th, 2012 at 11:36 am
He does have the air of a shitbird about him. Maybe he was in and got booted out for pot use.
November 19th, 2012 at 11:37 am
This is a first.
Must be the only time in history when someone has pretended to be Gomer Pyle from the movie “Full Metal Jacket.”
November 19th, 2012 at 11:50 am
Nice tits!
November 19th, 2012 at 11:50 am
I kindly left this messege on his page:
“Hey, fatass.
There is no possible way your gluttenous mass is currently in the Marine Corp. Impersonating a Marine Officer is bad enough, but then you do so with dope and booze? What the fuck? Not only do you have the uniform built wrong, but you are wearing it incorrectly, you sorry piece of shit.
I suggest you unfuck your photo page, apologize to all real Marines seeing it, and disavow any relation to any of the Armed Forces.”
Sorry for the subtlety, I was trying to be nice
November 19th, 2012 at 11:52 am
ETA: Is it just me or does this look a WHOLE lot like a 3-chinned Hispanic version of Freddy Mercury? I mean, just look at those DSL’s, man.
November 19th, 2012 at 11:56 am
The bottom pic has me baffled. Why would he go into a shithouse looking like shit and, using a shit-stained mirror, take a picture of himself, while holding his lard roll in? I don’t get it but that’s probably a good thing.
November 19th, 2012 at 11:56 am
@3, @8 Women? There were women in those photos?
That last picture looks like some sort of sports bra control top garment and the purple swim goggles are just awesome for effect….there’s just no way fabric can be expected to control that fat burgers top.
His facebook page stated he started working at USMC in 2008….unless those letters stand for Uber Sized Male Chicitas….
Wow…
November 19th, 2012 at 11:57 am
So lets give this POS an AlGore.net tag line that will live forever:
Romeo Martinez Marine Poser Brooklyn, NY
Romeo Martinez USMC Fake Brooklyn, NY
Romeo Martinez United States Marine Corps Fraud Brooklyn, NY
Romeo Martinez Stolen Valor Brooklyn, NY
Romeo Martinez Brooklyn, NY
OK Al do your thing with this info!
November 19th, 2012 at 12:01 pm
@19. You are a sick fella, Sparky. The least you could do is admire his purple sunglasses before you go there.
November 19th, 2012 at 12:03 pm
Wow, what a pig.
November 19th, 2012 at 12:05 pm
@19.
Those ain’t tits. Those are Moobs in sore need of a Bro.
November 19th, 2012 at 12:12 pm
Oh, crap. Sideboob! *gag*
November 19th, 2012 at 12:15 pm
Come on! Officers don’t drink Colt 45. Get a microbrew and get with the game.
Bringing sexy back
November 19th, 2012 at 12:25 pm
If he isn’t on the range or doing anything involving using his rifle, why is there a magazine in his weapon in his pictures? Is that a Marine thing?
November 19th, 2012 at 12:25 pm
Dogtags with plastic coating….no expense spared in faking.
November 19th, 2012 at 12:28 pm
That boy has more chins than a San Fran phone book.
November 19th, 2012 at 12:36 pm
Wow…This guy would need a landing craft all to himself to get ashore. Of course once he got ashore, Greenpeace would be there trying to roll him back into the ocean. “Swim away, Willy! Be free!”
November 19th, 2012 at 12:43 pm
I didn’t know the Marine Corps handed out officer commissions to people who merely “studied” at TCI College. Also, is grenadier an actual officer billet?
November 19th, 2012 at 12:47 pm
@29, I thought officers only sip expensive wine while eating caviar.
November 19th, 2012 at 12:55 pm
@35. While listening to classical music and playing a solo game of chess
November 19th, 2012 at 12:56 pm
Thought I would join in. I also sent this to a couple of the Marines I served with who are now in Jersey.
Hey fuckbag,
If you’re going to pretend to be a Marine then you should at least figure out how to properly wear the uniform. Nametapes on the wrong side, LT bars not properly aligned, etc. Let’s also not forget the fact that “Grenadier” is not an MOS and that there is no Romero Martinez in MOL. I have a couple of Marines that I served with just across the river from you; I’m sure they’d like to get together and “have a drink” with you. If I were you I’d knock this shit of right fucking now.
Sincerely yours,
An actual fucking Marine
November 19th, 2012 at 1:00 pm
“Grenadier” sounds cool, but for those who don’t know, it’s an assignment within a Marine fireteam – a PMOS 0311 (Rifleman) who carries the M203 grenade launcher, who is also the Fireteam Leader. Sadly, if he were an officer, this position would not go to him, as Infantry Officers carry the MOS 0302. It’s unlikely his fat-ass would make it through the Infantry Officer Course, let alone OCS/TBS.
You Army guys know what I’m talking about, I’m sure. There are probably just a few variations in how the Corps and Army does things in the infantry world.
November 19th, 2012 at 1:04 pm
WOW… Porkchop Platoon would even be embarrassed !
November 19th, 2012 at 1:19 pm
@39: The only platoon this “LT” is qualified to lead is the Human Mine Detector Platoon. With his bulk he could detonate an AT mine pretty easily.
November 19th, 2012 at 1:45 pm
Ah, the spaghetti-strap tank top. I see that he shops in the GAP women’s department. I just wonder if that one has the hidden bra. His cup runneth over, front and back.
Couldn’t make up his mind which way to go, so he went both ways.
November 19th, 2012 at 2:20 pm
@33
Meh. He could function as the landing craft himself. Fat floats, ya know.
@38
” It’s unlikely his fat-ass would make it through the Infantry Officer Course, let alone OCS/TBS.”
I doubt he could even make it through the O-course. Hell, looking like that, I doubt he could make it TO the O-course, unless there was a sandwich on a string involved somewhere.
Can you imagine this chunk of junk trying to get through the confidence course? The slide for life would be like “Ow! Ow! Ow! Fuck it. SNAP!!!”
November 19th, 2012 at 2:28 pm
Nik, He has to make it through his door before he can even think about the O-course.
November 19th, 2012 at 2:32 pm
Can you imagine this chunk of junk trying to get through the confidence course? The slide for life would be like “Ow! Ow! Ow! Fuck it. SNAP!!!”
OMG Nik! I actually laughed out on this statement.. Good one
November 19th, 2012 at 2:39 pm
He has never seen a pizza he didn’t like…or a french fry… or a gallon of ice cream….
November 19th, 2012 at 2:50 pm
@23
“@3, @8 Women? There were women in those photos?”
Hey now, just because his chest is bigger than theirs is no reason to question their femininity.
November 19th, 2012 at 3:01 pm
@42. “Arrr, mateys. Thar she blows off the starboard bow. All hands man the harpoon guns! This is a big’un!”
November 19th, 2012 at 3:11 pm
I’ve heard of junk in the trunk…but this is ridiculous.
November 19th, 2012 at 3:14 pm
We should drop him on Islamabad. The shockwave alone would kill more Taliban than the rest of the Corp combined…..
November 19th, 2012 at 3:15 pm
If this guy and the round Marine where to be stationed on Okinawa together the island really would flip over.
November 19th, 2012 at 3:16 pm
The last photo he is wearing a Spandex reducer. I really did not know spandex came in that size. And the uniform can only be a maternity uniform….
November 19th, 2012 at 3:19 pm
Come on now…he joined because he heard of Porkchop and Hamburger Hills.
He is a future MoH receipient for gastronomic action at Bacon Ridge
November 19th, 2012 at 3:22 pm
What I sent him…
Hey buddy,
Do me a favor, knock off the Marine stuff…some of us are REAL Marines, and it pisses us off slightly to see dudes like you (overweight,disgusting,fake) wearing our uniform (incorrectly).
Plus, grenadier is not a billet for officers (we saw your Lt bars), so you have only made yourself look really stupid.
You have already become famous, http://thisainthell.us/blog/?p=32916#comments
And guess what, you are only going to get more famous…hope the attention is worth it!
-Ssgt Ryan Page, USMC (Infantry 2000-present)
November 19th, 2012 at 3:31 pm
Wait a minute… since when does the Marine Corps issue AR-15s? In one of the last pictures in that anal-swab’s facebook gallery, he’s holding one. Last I checked, it was the M4 they issued…
Unless that’s part of his secret Twinkie Liberation Mission.
November 19th, 2012 at 3:41 pm
Tool.
November 19th, 2012 at 3:45 pm
I love how in the picture looking out to the city he says he woke up at 0300 for a run, I’m pretty sure he meant 1500 since it’s daylight out. Also for a run…doesn’t really count if it’s to the nearest donut shop for his baker’s dozen to start the day.
November 19th, 2012 at 3:49 pm
Pizza the Hut?
November 19th, 2012 at 4:05 pm
#57 Twist: Jabba the Gut.
November 19th, 2012 at 4:12 pm
Brings new meaning to the phrase “gutting it out”.
November 19th, 2012 at 4:22 pm
Nobody he can’t stomach adversity. Clearly he has stomached a LOT of adversity…and pizza…and pie…and cake…
November 19th, 2012 at 4:22 pm
Twist @ 43…just grease his hips and toss in a candy bar.
November 19th, 2012 at 4:29 pm
@41 The only way that “guy” got that at the GAP is if GAP now offers plus plus sizing in their ladies attire….
November 19th, 2012 at 4:32 pm
Thank you Al Gore … here are the results:
Google Web and Image –> Romeo Martinez Marine –> and it takes direct to TAH and his now famous (or infamous) photographs.
If he wants attention … he has it now!
God Bless Al Gore for inventing the internet and the United States of America!
November 19th, 2012 at 4:57 pm
@62
If he ever did get in there, they’d have to change the name from “The Gap” to “The Full”.
November 19th, 2012 at 5:04 pm
Love the EGA tat’s on both arms.. That clearly shows that he’s the real deal…..NOT !!!
November 19th, 2012 at 5:30 pm
“Do Marines have weight standards?”
Looking at this guy, obviously they do. Very high ones. (smile)
November 19th, 2012 at 5:36 pm
Reminds me of Lawrence in Full metal Jacket……..
November 19th, 2012 at 5:43 pm
If you put lipstick on a fat pig you’ll still have a fat pig with lipstick…..Nothing ever changes….He can drop and give me a 100 for displaying my emblem with the anchor outboard…..assmaggot…..
November 19th, 2012 at 5:54 pm
@68, if he drops, not only will he not be able to give you 100 for malfeasance in uniform, he will set of an earthquake and get stuck in the fault line.
November 19th, 2012 at 6:03 pm
This fuck was never a Marine. His cammies don’t even have the eagle globe and anchor on them. Any dirtbag can buy these at an army navy store
November 19th, 2012 at 6:29 pm
He should wear a red jumpsuit and yell, “Hey Kool-Aid!”
November 19th, 2012 at 6:53 pm
He is holding that bottle of Colt 45 while his “buddy” celebrates repeal of DADT by plowing his brown cherry.
November 19th, 2012 at 7:24 pm
@72. He probably couldn’t hear himself fart for a month after that.
November 19th, 2012 at 7:49 pm
He is pretty intimidating wearing that football uniform with the red Crocs in his Facebook photos.
November 19th, 2012 at 7:51 pm
I left him a message sharing this link. We shouldn’t be able to laugh at him without his presence.
I left: “Hey Romeo, fat dude. I caught your link over at “This Ain’t Hell” where we have a hell of a lot of fun with phat phony phuckers. Are you really trying to pass yourself off as a Marine? No shit? What a hoot. Check the link, and, you might want to book mark it to see what goes on when the FOIA info comes back on you.
http://thisainthell.us/blog/?p=32916“
November 19th, 2012 at 8:28 pm
@73
You kidding? Flabby as that guy is, it takes a month for a fart to get from his asshole past his buttcheeks.
November 19th, 2012 at 10:59 pm
What I am curious to know is how a fat fucked up piece of shit like you could even THINK of trying to pass yourself off as a Marine. I certainly hope some real deal Marines don’t decide to take those two fingers you like to flash and shove them up your ass to the elbow. Might be best if you just suck started an M1911 Colt .45
(just thought I’d send him my 2 cents) LOL
November 19th, 2012 at 11:23 pm
Not sure I want to keep piling on this guy. Dumb ass kid who thought it would be cool to get a uniform and play dress-up. No one in their right mind would even think he was a Marine and it don’t look like he was out in public trying to pass himself off. I think he has enough issues with his weight and sexuality than having his moment of stupidity scar him for life.The kid needs guidance, not have his head ripped off by the people he probably looks up to. A tactfully worded message asking him to take down the pictures and apologize and post it up would be the way to go.If he still acts up, well then all bets are off.
November 19th, 2012 at 11:29 pm
“Dumb ass kid who thought it would be cool to get a uniform and play dress-up.”
Maybe. Let me float another possibility.
2008 comes. Romeo goes into the Corps. Maybe he makes it through Boot, maybe he doesn’t. Either way, he gets kicked out. Happens. At that point, assuming he didn’t fuck up too bad, I’d say let him be to live out his life. The Corps isn’t for everyone.
But not Romeo. He’s gotta come up with a story. So he does. And another. And another. Pretty soon, he’s scouring the web for LT bars, because he has a stupid narrative to back up. One that might fool civilians. Now he’s got this whole lie built up.
Looking through the pics I see a lot of “Marines” and “USMC” shirts on his page. This isn’t just cosplay. He didn’t buy a costume as a lark. He’s got this whole thing going.
November 20th, 2012 at 12:02 am
Everyone keeps saying he’s a kid, but he’s not. He’s 36-37 year old felon from Phoenix, Arizona. http://www.phoenix.gov/news/policebreakingnews/suspects_101609.html
Someone should call the cops in Phonix on him so they can correct his fat ass before a real Marine sees him playing dress up.
November 20th, 2012 at 12:05 am
@ 80 …. wrong … that is his cousin!
Our fool is from Brooklyn YO!
November 20th, 2012 at 12:12 am
@81 How do you know that?
November 21st, 2012 at 4:10 pm
He is a 20 year old boy out of New York City & Romeo isn’t his real first name. He has a twin sister who makes him look like a midget. Gathering info now to file a sf-180 form.
November 21st, 2012 at 4:44 pm
@ 78-Just an Old Dog: I can appreciate your sentiment but it won’t work. If he doesn’t know any better than to impersonate a Marine officer, and a poor impersonation at that, he won’t listen. I hate any poser but when they claim to be Marines it REALLY PISSES ME OFF! I did the 13 weeks in the mid ’70s when “wall-to-wall counseling” was still accepted. When missing noon-chow was an acceptable punishment, etc. No guidance from this Jarhead…just head ripping.
November 23rd, 2012 at 3:29 am
Since I didn’t see it mentioned before. His high fat content, unshaven mug and screwy uniform aside my personal fave is that the USMC on his tattoo is backwards. You just don’t see that kind of committment to being a reh-taard anymore.
November 23rd, 2012 at 8:15 pm
Another loser, so short on friends that he has to rely on his bathroom mirror and his phone for his photos. Pathetic. Wonder why he didn’t hold the phone up high and take the photo “looking down” like the rest of the girls do.
November 23rd, 2012 at 8:28 pm
Wanting to be sure to give ol’ Romeo the chance to see his name up inlights; I sent this message to one of his friends. Perhaps the lady will pass it on to him. It would be a shame for him to be in the next round of posers and not even know it was going on.
I wrote:
“Hello Lisandra:
I saw that you are listed as one of Romeo Martinez friends. We veterans have been looking his photos over. He is pretending to be a Marine. If he were a real Marine, he would know how to put his uniform on, and where to pin the various things on it. We can see that he is just a pretender, not what he claims. You might let him know that he has gotten his name up in lights. See him here at “This Ain’t Hell”, and read the comments on him. Please share the link with him:
http://thisainthell.us/blog/?p=32916“
November 23rd, 2012 at 8:54 pm
# 87, Lisandra is actually this ass-clowns twin sister. His real name is Rigoberto Martinez & they are 20 years old.
November 24th, 2012 at 9:23 am
RE:#88:
Then there should be no reason for him to claim that he didn’t know we were posting on him, eh? I thought that she was a sibling, but didn’t dig into it.
November 26th, 2012 at 10:21 am
This is all a game to this idiot. He would be lucky to know how to spell Stolen Valor. Let alone know the definition behind it.
November 27th, 2012 at 2:52 pm
This guy is beyond mentally disturbed. He isn’t just a kid he’s a loser with nothing going for him so he decided to imitate a position of honor and respect. Unfortunately, like with everything else in his life, he failed horribly. This asshole needs to be taught a lesson. He is manipulating many people. This piece of shit goes into places trying to get a military discount. It’s not right for him to even give the slightest illusion that he is part of those who are actually brave and make REAL sacrifices. His nasty ass should not be in ANYTHING military related. What a fool! I can’t wait for him to get in trouble for all of this. Seriously disrespectful and disgusting. Lisandra is his twin sister and of course, she doesn’t care nor will respond to anything we say about her poser brother. FUN FACT: Rigoberto Martinez is an undercover gay man. He’s a member to several gay relief centers in nyc.
November 28th, 2012 at 3:28 pm
Yes, Marines do have weight standards. They also think that guys should not wear mascara, unless I’m much mistaken.
I found this parody this morning. It has lyrics written by Allan Sherman, music by Gilbert & Sullivan from “HMS Pinafore”.
Little Butterball
I’m called Little Butterball,
Dear Little Butterball,
‘Though I could never tell why.
My calories mount.
My cholesterol count
Is as high as an elephant’s eye.
They told me to diet.
I promised I’d try it,
Yet somehow my weight would not budge.
Each Metrecal cookie
To me tasted ookie,
So I covered it with hot fudge.
I ate watercresses,
And other such messes,
And pushed all my favorites aside.
I said to the caterers,
“No more mashed potaterers,
Just baked, and hash browned, and french fried.”
I sing this sad song
‘Cause my diet went wrong,
‘Though I honestly tried to pay heed.
I don’t care how high
Is an elephant’s eye,
But an elephant’s rear I don’t need.
December 27th, 2012 at 3:44 pm
Any updates on this guy? Found another of his facebook profiles.
https://www.facebook.com/#!/rigoberto.martinez.10048/photos_stream
February 17th, 2013 at 1:37 pm
Wtf… i know that after my enlistment i gained a few pounds… I respected the uniform. i will not wear it being a fat body. Im still proud Marine to the day. But this shit bird still wearing his Holloween costume or something. I didnt know they made XXXL Cammies.
February 17th, 2013 at 2:02 pm
One thing is for certain, and it’s that NO doughnut, cupcake, pizza, or extra-large cheeseburger is safe from that lardball poser!
February 17th, 2013 at 2:04 pm
91 – Is that true, downlow guy with a mental illness. The mentall illness part I see from his pictures and comments.
gay relief centers?? lol
February 17th, 2013 at 2:59 pm
Regarding that cell phone self-portrait, is that spooge on the mirror?
February 17th, 2013 at 3:11 pm
That, or his booger collection!
February 22nd, 2013 at 8:42 am
[...] brat alerts us to the fact that Fatboy Marine Romeo Martinez is back at his jackassery. No, these aren’t photoshopped at [...]
May 22nd, 2013 at 6:41 pm
The thing I find funny is the creator of this page actually stole valor. I did an foia on him and he in fact does not have a CIB in his records.
May 22nd, 2013 at 6:44 pm
Put up or shut up.