Robert Hoffman; Submariner spy wannabe
December 7th, 2012
Ex-PH2 sends us a link to an NBC video report about Robert Hoffman, a former member of the Navy who was arrested yesterday for trying to pass information about our submarine technology to people he thought were representing the Russian Federation, but I’m guessing that they were US Federal agents instead.
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It should make the submarine folks on this blog happy to finally have one of their own to hate on for a change.
December 7th, 2012 at 8:32 am
Quick common sense guide to people thinking of doing things like this.
Rule 1: Don’t sell secrets or buy illegal things from FBI agents.
Rule 2: The guy offering to buy your stuff or sell you illegal things is an FBI agent.
Some people are too dumb to function without reminder notices.
December 7th, 2012 at 9:05 am
As someone who used to hunt submarines, I hate this guy even more. The last thing I want is for OUR technology to get into the hands of potential enemies and make ASW even harder than it already is.
I hope he gets a long time vacation to a federal prison.
December 7th, 2012 at 9:12 am
Crypto Tech (CT). IOW, maybe a “rider” at one point, but never a submariner.
Still want to see this fucker fry. Remember, Walker/Whitworth had access and sold crypto to the Soviets too.
Unless he fesses up to smoking poles, he’s not in a protected class, so this guy’s trial and burial UNDER the prison should be swift.
December 7th, 2012 at 9:23 am
Crypto tech, eh? So was Walker. And the sub tech stuff Walker sold the Soviets was actually the lesser impact.
Wrap this bastard with about 100lb of chain, padlock it tightly to itself, grease him up, shove him into a tube, and fire one.
December 7th, 2012 at 9:31 am
Screw that. Let him walk the piers of the submarine bases, and while he stands on the brow of each and every boat in each and every port we’ve got boats starting with Norfolk, he gets dickpunched by each and every crewmember of each and every boat.
Actually, I’ll do one better. First guy off the first boat he visits gets to knock his fucking teeth down his throat with a shore power wrench. That’ll teach him to give a shit-eating grin like that.
December 7th, 2012 at 9:43 am
The video doesn’t say if he was still on active duty when he tried out his ‘marketing skills’, but the stuff he was selling was classified, and he’s been out of the service for a year (according to the report). He was at a cockfight
when he was busted.
So, isn’t his clearance automatically canceled once he’s out? And if he’s been out for a year, how did he get his hands on the material to begin with? I’d just like to see more information than this abbreviated 30-second info shot.
Otherwise, I agree with you guys – he needs to be dragged behind my car down a highway under repair.
December 7th, 2012 at 9:43 am
Traitors, the lowest kind of scum. No punishment that has been invented so far is good enough for them.
December 7th, 2012 at 9:46 am
This is from a print new report:
Hoffman, 39, is described as a 20-year veteran of the U.S. Navy who was trained in cryptology and reached the rank of petty officer first class. He retired from active duty in November 2011. According to his biography released by the military, he served as a submarine warfare specialist.
Link is below:
http://www.wmtw.com/news/national/Former-sailor-charged-with-espionage/-/8792078/17681164/-/13qy6jqz/-/index.html#ixzz2ENE7gtTP
December 7th, 2012 at 9:57 am
Sometimes I think we need to bring back the Greek’s Brazen bull.
December 7th, 2012 at 10:19 am
PH2–more likely than not he was offering what he knew rather than any tangible assets (i.e., manuals, etc.) As you know, the one thing they can’t do is the MIB look into the pretty light flashy thing.
15 years after the fact and I can (quite literally) still do a full reactor startup in my sleep.
December 7th, 2012 at 10:29 am
ETA: Although if he was offering manuals or other material his house, etc., is more likely than not being torn to the foundation as we speak. Good.
December 7th, 2012 at 10:41 am
Sparky, please don’t start up reactors in your sleep.
I can till explain the way photons excite the silver halides in a film emulsion layer and how developer chemistry makes them clump into grains so that an image appears on the film, even though all the images I shoot now are digital.
December 7th, 2012 at 10:50 am
It’s funny, the things you remember. I can still describe the function of the UH-1H Variable Inlet Guide Vane Actuator (as can my wife, who helped me study in flight school), the four types of hypoxia, as well as the shut-down sequence for an OH-58C. Remembering birthdays and where I’m supposed to meet my wife on Wednesday night? Not so much.
December 7th, 2012 at 10:53 am
VI–heard that. Immediate actions for a fast Rx coolant leak? Nailed it. What did I have for lunch on Tuesday? Not a clue.
December 7th, 2012 at 10:59 am
@13, I can still describe verbatum from FM 23-67 my M-60, but can’t remember where I left my truck keys.
December 7th, 2012 at 11:03 am
In that vein, maybe Jonn should post this:
http://www.theglobaledition.com/drone-pilot-ejects-from-office-chair/
I think (hope) it’s a joke….
December 7th, 2012 at 11:14 am
#6, Not necessarily. The report doesn’t say what he’s doing now, other than supporting cockfighting, but if he had a civilian job that required a clearance, it would be transferred over.
December 7th, 2012 at 11:23 am
#13 My husband is the same way. He can remember chapter 5 & 9 like the back of his hand, but remember to take the trash out every Thursday-nope! I am assuming that is a military or a male thing.
December 7th, 2012 at 11:24 am
LOl– Furthermore if you were to ask him the fatality buttons for Mortal Combat from years ago; I am sure he could remember that. And I know it is a male thing, because my 13 year old son is the same way.
December 7th, 2012 at 11:25 am
Twist–other pants.
December 7th, 2012 at 11:26 am
NHSparky–or, more likely, in the truck.
December 7th, 2012 at 11:36 am
I’m not sure I can remember regulations and procedures like the rest of you guys, but I’ve for the basics down: bleeding=bad.
December 7th, 2012 at 11:46 am
Unless it’s that assclown in prison, bleeding rectally after Bubba and all his buddies get done with him.
I’m still liking the shore power wrench in his shit-eating grin idea.
December 7th, 2012 at 11:49 am
Turd.
December 7th, 2012 at 12:03 pm
Twist, Sparky, VI — green bowl next to the phone on the table by the cherry chest-of-drawers.
December 7th, 2012 at 12:25 pm
Where do you even find someone to try and sell secrets to? Craigslist?
December 7th, 2012 at 12:30 pm
#26
I wouldn’t doubt.. And then they sit in jail saying “I wonder how I got caught.”
December 7th, 2012 at 12:44 pm
Random–there are worse places.
Remeber that Walker just walked up to the Soviet Embassy in DC and gave himself and a cipher card to the KGB rezident on a silver platter.
December 7th, 2012 at 1:11 pm
This is the same sort of reason I yell at any of my wanker Pollard-supporter peers. These guys threaten to do or do great harm to the rest of us, and the detail and imagination put into a very drawn-out execution should satisfy every individual who could die or be injured because jackwagons like this turn mercenary.
December 7th, 2012 at 1:22 pm
@26 – I remember a case of a soldier getting nailed for trying to sell a DAGR (Military GPS) on e-bay. Seriously. Guess who the winning bidder was?
December 7th, 2012 at 2:01 pm
Submariner wisdom:
“The stupid shall be punished.”
December 7th, 2012 at 2:02 pm
I’m waiting for Joel over at TSSBP to pick this one up. Guess he’s busy today.
Another bit–stupidity can (and should) be painful.
December 7th, 2012 at 2:23 pm
Hey, I have an idea. Let’s put Bob with Breanna. They can share stories, bitch and moan, and wait for sentencing.
Then the sentence is: drop them off in the middle of somewhere with no idea how they got there, no map, no compass, no food, no water, no shelter and only the clothes they were wearing the day they were arrested.
Just make sure it’s a long distance away from here.
Mars is good.
December 7th, 2012 at 2:44 pm
Ex-PH2: I’d recommend Adak in the Aleutians. Or maybe Shemya.
December 7th, 2012 at 2:50 pm
Oh, further out than that, Hondo. Adak is too close in.
How about Semisopochnoi? It’s mostly volcanoes. There’s also Gareloi. Just one big volcano, rumbles a lot.
December 7th, 2012 at 2:58 pm
Those would work too. But Buldir Island might be even better. It’s halfway between the two westernmost island groups in the Aleutians.
December 7th, 2012 at 3:06 pm
Hondo, I concur.
December 7th, 2012 at 3:08 pm
I keep thinking of that movie “Burn after Reading” where Jon Malckovich says “the Russians, really…the Russians”.
December 7th, 2012 at 3:09 pm
How about just out on the pack ice? Polar bears got to eat too.
December 7th, 2012 at 3:18 pm
Twist–nah, there’s a very small chance one of them would get lucky and kill a polar bear, and find warmth and food from them.
South Pole would be MUCH better. In July.
December 7th, 2012 at 3:52 pm
The first and only Marine to be charged with espionage was a fellow by the name of Clayton (Craig) Lonetree. He was convicted and sentenced to 30 years. His sentence was later reduced to 15 and he was released in 1996, after serving 8+ years.
This Navy guy may not go away at all, let alone for a long time. He TRIED to pass info. The Marine actually forked over some stuff and was paid by the Rooskies.
December 7th, 2012 at 4:06 pm
Hahahahaha @NHSparky in comment 3. That’s rich coming from a guy who spent his career riding an underwater phallic synbol.
December 7th, 2012 at 4:18 pm
@42
An underwater phallic symbol full of seamen.
December 7th, 2012 at 4:56 pm
One wall. One post. One squad of armed men. One blindfold (optional).
December 7th, 2012 at 5:13 pm
@42. So, punky, how long have you had that penis fixation?
December 7th, 2012 at 5:44 pm
@#25, what is that “phone” thing you speak of?
Folks, your solutions are imaginative, but expensive.
Why not dress them in brown, tie a couple of tree branches to their heads and turn them loose in Northern Michigan on November 15(First day of deer season)? Guarantee they wouldn’t see 5pm that day.
December 7th, 2012 at 6:07 pm
@46. Is the tag fee waived?
December 7th, 2012 at 6:19 pm
@46 – It’s the thing people used to use to talk to each other when they weren’t together in the same place. Invented after smoke signals, handwritten letters, telegrams and ships’ signal flags.
I have no idea what people use now.
December 7th, 2012 at 8:00 pm
Its about damn time you boom tube riders got one of your own to screw with, LOL! Loving this!
December 7th, 2012 at 8:49 pm
@47, fee waived, and bonus paid for a kill. A case of beer, or a quart of liquor, winner’s choice.
December 7th, 2012 at 9:05 pm
Yeah, dude was a rider. Unfortunately, he apparently was pretty good at his job, but had a lot of issues when it comes to his family. I personally don’t think I ever rode with him, but the T-bird names and faces run together sometimes. I hope they got him at the start because the stuff he knows could go a long way for the enemy.
December 7th, 2012 at 9:09 pm
He was picked up at a cockfight. Probably goes to dog fights, too. Probably has gambling debts up the wazoo.
I’d like to see someone stick something nasty up his wazoo.
December 8th, 2012 at 9:02 am
Well, considering he’s retired, he’s also still subject to the UCMJ. Goody!
And GF, don’t bullshit me. You’d be curled up in a ball in the valve station crying for your momma before the brow ever came off.