Michael Moore’s New Years Resolution
December 31st, 2012
Is apparently to continue being a total douche.
Stop saying “I support the troops.” I don’t. I used to. I understand why so many enlisted after 9/11. Sadly, many of them were then trapped and sent off to invade Iraq. I felt for all of them. I understood those who joined because of a lousy economy. But at some point all individuals must answer for their actions, and now that we know our military leaders do things that have nothing to do with defending our lives, why would anyone sign up for this rogue organization?
Yes, I shit you not that was his actual New Years Resolution just emailed to me.
December 31st, 2012 at 7:35 pm
Fuck his fat ass.
December 31st, 2012 at 7:35 pm
What, did you really think he’d do something like lose weight?
December 31st, 2012 at 7:36 pm
What a douche canoe. Then again, we all knew that.
December 31st, 2012 at 7:44 pm
Fuck him with a pinapple
December 31st, 2012 at 7:44 pm
Michael Moore is done feeling sorry for the poor saps who enlisted in the Armed Forces of the United States. He has withdrawn his support.
Bwahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah. You couldn’t possibly make this stuff up.
December 31st, 2012 at 7:48 pm
You know there are times I really have to wonder if he’s stupid enough to actually believe what he says
December 31st, 2012 at 7:52 pm
I’m sure we are all shocked by this statement.
December 31st, 2012 at 7:54 pm
Like we cared what his cheeseburger-laden ass thought anyway. There’s a heart attack in his imminent future and, just like when George Carlin died, I’m gonna have a sip of the top shelf stuff to celebrate.
December 31st, 2012 at 7:56 pm
I hereby resolve never to watch a Michael Moore movie. I anticipate no problems in keeping this resolution as I have faithfully kept it for my entire life up until now.
December 31st, 2012 at 7:59 pm
Notice how he never uses the name “Obama” anywhere is his rant? The “military leaders” are just a “rogue organization” and not carrying out the orders of the President (PBUH) in any way.
December 31st, 2012 at 8:00 pm
His movies had reached the level of Jane Fonda movies long ago, they are not allowed in my house.
December 31st, 2012 at 8:03 pm
@11. Admit it Twist, you watched Barbarella. Come on.
December 31st, 2012 at 8:04 pm
Go eat more pork rinds, Michael Moore. MAYBE,just maybe you’ll choke on ‘em and I meant it in a totally *sincere way*.
December 31st, 2012 at 8:06 pm
“why would anyone sign up for this rogue organization?”
Does porky mean the Obumba regime?
December 31st, 2012 at 8:06 pm
@12, Bite your tounge, but I am sure you watched Monster-in-law.
December 31st, 2012 at 8:09 pm
Funny how you left out the rest of it, you bloated pigmeleon.
December 31st, 2012 at 8:09 pm
For someone who owes all of his success to capitalism, he’s really pretty big on socialism.
December 31st, 2012 at 8:11 pm
Michael Moore learned everything he knows growing up poor on the mean streets of Flint, Michigan. Except that he never lived in Flint. He grew up in a wealthy suburb an hour outside of Flint and couldn’t even see it on the horizon from where he lived. Oh, and he was never poor. His daddy was a manager at GM (as in “skyscraper office manager,” not “dealership manager”) who made enough money that their new house was paid off, mom could stay home and be a housewife, and little Mikey and the rest of the kids didn’t need to bother with trivial things like scholarships and financial aid to attend the major university of their choice. Seriously, he has been a lying poser piece of shit for so long, he probably can’t remember a time when he wasn’t making false claims. The fact that anybody anywhere actually pays any attention whatsoever to anything that gelatinous assdouche says makes me lose hope in humanity sometimes.
On a brighter note, it is funny to see other liberals cringe when that lardass endorses their platforms.
December 31st, 2012 at 8:11 pm
There was only one time that I actually was looking forward to seeing her, but she was afraid to come out of her trailer. Seems that the sight of real patriots on motorcycles shut her up, for once!
December 31st, 2012 at 8:12 pm
jabba the hut,,,what a piece of fat shit
December 31st, 2012 at 8:23 pm
#18 so he’s the original butthurt basement dweller? Not surprising. At all.
December 31st, 2012 at 8:25 pm
“…all individuals must answer for their actions.” Soldiers must answer up. People using to kill kids? Nope. The gun did it.
December 31st, 2012 at 8:38 pm
To quote a fellow from Jersey, “Fuck you, you fucking fuck!”
December 31st, 2012 at 8:42 pm
Thumb sucking fat sack of shit !
i can’t say what i’d like to do to the S of a B…..don’t wanna get this blog in trouble.
December 31st, 2012 at 8:46 pm
Oh, and he can kiss my straight-leg ass!
December 31st, 2012 at 8:46 pm
@16. That is the entire Moore resolution #4. Not a single word was omitted or added. In resolution #5, Moore resolved to apologize for #4. Is that what you are referring to? If so, are you so stupid to think that Moore actually meant #5, when he could have simply omitted #4 if he did not mean it?
December 31st, 2012 at 8:50 pm
He’s just a fat pile of nasty shit that eats way too much shit because his mother was shit and had shit for a baby. I hope he dies by drowning in his own shit.
December 31st, 2012 at 8:53 pm
what I found most entertaining was resolution #2: “Learn how to cook dinner.”
really? he’s awfully well fed for someone who doesn’t know how to cook.
December 31st, 2012 at 9:01 pm
Handy translation for everything Moore has said in the last 6 or so years “Please, please, please, please, pleeeeeeease, pay attention to me.
Happy New Years!
December 31st, 2012 at 9:03 pm
I hope that MM and Fonda are buried next to each other, so at least I won’t have to go far to piss on both their graves.
First keg’s on me.
December 31st, 2012 at 9:09 pm
@27. I hate it commenters mince their words.
December 31st, 2012 at 9:11 pm
Sorry, I ran out of whens but I have now restocked. Put one between “it” and “commenters” in cmt 31. Thanks.
December 31st, 2012 at 9:18 pm
@16–awwwww…someone’s a little butthurt, are they?
And how’s the weather in the Metroplex today, scooter? Are you getting all the services from CoreSpace that you have come to expect?
December 31st, 2012 at 9:33 pm
Could we make an attempt to apply a bit of, albeit, weak logic to this situation? For MM to make a resolution wouldn’t it necessitate his having some sort of resolve? Oh, wait. Forgot myself there for a moment – libtards only require talking about something. In their feeble brain matter that is better than doing something. Talk, talk, talk. Pass laws, laws, and more laws. Nevermind consequences or common sense, and certainly never consider results or whethrer anything they talk about actually works.
No, no, no! Don’t try to introduce facts into the altered reality of a libtard!
December 31st, 2012 at 9:41 pm
The weather could be warmer but it’s probably not as cold as it is up on Cross Road, you know roundabout Rochester, boy?
December 31st, 2012 at 9:45 pm
I honestly thought michael more “or less” (emphasis on the less)’s resolution would be to pull his head out his A$$ and have a lucent thought for once in his pathetic, wasted, worth a $h1t, limp d1ck life and maybe contribute something meaningful to our country.
December 31st, 2012 at 9:57 pm
Who is Michael Moore and why should I care?
December 31st, 2012 at 10:25 pm
God I long for the day it’s announced the fat fucktard has eaten himself to death.
December 31st, 2012 at 10:45 pm
I was just thinking…
If the “Red Dawn” scenario ever actually happens, you know his sorry ass would jump (figuratively speaking) at the chance to be a collaborator and check the final box on his traitor résumé. Soooooo, could there be a bright side to that nightmare?
Guess I’d better stop there before the free excercise of my First Amendment rights gets me in trouble with the libtards for “hate speech” even though they make far more explicit threats all the time, but it’s okay because they’re “progressive.” Funny how they openly claim to cherish the First Amendment, but consistently act like they hate it as much as they hate the Second.
December 31st, 2012 at 10:59 pm
At least he’s being honest regarding his feelings towards the military and the troops. This is what Libtards think yet most of them won’t publicly admit it. He’s actually doing everyone a favoring by showing how hateful and disgusting Libtards truly are.
December 31st, 2012 at 11:17 pm
What a piece of disgusting shit. He needs to be lit up and pissed out.
December 31st, 2012 at 11:24 pm
Well, he should say he doesn’t support his Lord and Savior Baracky-Poo, either. ….Baracky-Poo is the one in charge for the last 4 years…
December 31st, 2012 at 11:47 pm
In a perfect world, this fat fuck would choke to death on a Weight Watchers brownie. But then again, in a perfect world, Yoko would’ve taken the bullet instead of John…
January 1st, 2013 at 12:19 am
He needs to be tied up in a chair and force fed McRib sammiches until his heart pops.
January 1st, 2013 at 12:36 am
Turd.
January 1st, 2013 at 12:39 am
Oh, how cute–he knows how to use Google and Twitter.
Hey shitbag, at least I don’t need to hide behind someone else’s ISP, right?
January 1st, 2013 at 12:47 am
POS, is that you Dallas failingfield?
January 1st, 2013 at 12:53 am
Nah, DullASS ain’t that smart. DeWald is about the only stalker I have that hates me enough to actually give a shit and look up my address.
Yeah, you can tell I’m shaking…or not.
January 1st, 2013 at 1:35 am
Well, all in all, he kind of apologized for the above statement (#4 of his resolution) with the next statement:
5. Apologize for No. 4. I have enormous respect for anyone who would offer to sacrifice their life to defend my right to live. Is there any greater gift one can give another? It’s not the troops’ fault they’re sent to invade other countries for dubious reasons and outright lies. It’s OUR responsibility to prevent this, to elect representatives who believe in peace, and to only put our troops in harm’s way when it’s absolutely necessary. My uncle was killed in World War II. Today would have been his 90th birthday. My dad still misses him. Our family has served this country in the military since the Revolutionary War. None of them watch Fox News.
January 1st, 2013 at 1:46 am
i hear that mantra from people occasionally. it is almost like a desperate plea to get people to take anything they have done with their lives seriously. of course, those who say these kind of things understand that anything they have done in their life lacks any sort of real conviction or sacrafice (making movies and complaining about things are not particularly difficult activities). so they belittle others and try to make people who are actually able to back up their beliefs with action and commitment into the bad guy. and moore says this stuff as if anyone actually joins because they want to support political leaders. everyone has their own reasons for joining, and i do not want to speak for everyone, but i would hope their reasons were for something more important than political stances.
January 1st, 2013 at 1:46 am
Blanka,
That is a cover his ass apology, if he meant it he wouldn’t have said the first. He is a turd who is trying to stay relevant…
January 1st, 2013 at 1:54 am
Our family has served this country in the military since the Revolutionary War.
A tradition that died with you, lardass. Thank God for small favors. So I wonder how MM feels about LBJ “lying” us into war? Or Truman? Or FDR? Or Wilson’s laughable “neutrality”?
Better yet, hell, let’s get old Mikey to lecture us on how Buchanan was such an incompetent prick he basically dumped the Civil War into Lincoln’s lap–oh wait. Buchanan was a Democrat. Can’t be blaming Democrats, now.
Go choke on a chicken leg already, Mikey. Seriously. You were almost funny for a while, but you’ve jumped the shark–or eaten it.
January 1st, 2013 at 2:15 am
every time i pinch off a loaf i think of this botched abortion named m moore
January 1st, 2013 at 5:05 am
@48 LOL. Yeah, I hear he’s lacking in the smarts department.
January 1st, 2013 at 9:15 am
Moore is truly a despicable slob. How Twinkies went out of business with him around is beyond me. He says his uncle was killed in WWII. Given that Moore is the sole source, I don’t believe it. If pressed, Moore would probably change that statement to say that his uncle was killed DURING the war. That would most likely turn out to mean that his uncle died in a car accident somewhere in the US during the war years. He also says his family has served this country in the military since the Revolutionary War. I don’t believe that either. If pressed, Moore would probably change that statement to say that his family SERVED THE MILITARY by operating an inn which catered exclusively to Redcoats and Englist loyalists.
January 1st, 2013 at 9:33 am
Moore is a Communist asshole. Communist assholes always hate the US Military.
He’s just a refreshingly honest Communist asshole, unlike the knobs pushing the “got your six” campaign, after 8 years of backstabbing us when W was CINC.
January 1st, 2013 at 9:40 am
Notice how he think that because other people he happens to be related to have served in the past, he has the moral authority to shit on people actually serving.
January 1st, 2013 at 9:43 am
@57. I agree but would stress that Moore’s unsubstantiated CLAIMS of having UNNAMED blood relatives that served in some unspecified capacity in the military are just that: bald claims lacking any factual support.
January 1st, 2013 at 9:52 am
Wait a minute; he says in one part “screw you” to the military and then in the next part “sorry for saying that”? It was written! If he didn’t mean it, he could have just deleted it before continuing on with his list. He’s full of shit and anyone that defends his bullshit is as much of a loser as he is.
January 1st, 2013 at 10:37 am
Brilliant. Guess what – most of my ancestors who served in the military also didn’t watch Fox News. You know, because, like almost nobody, military or otherwise, prior to 1950 watched or had access to a TV even if there had been such a thing as Fox News then.
Every time this clown opens his mouth he again proves his lack of intellect, ability to put together a cogent thought, or anything that matters. Simply must agree with those who wonder why I should waste any time on him at all.
January 1st, 2013 at 11:00 am
I’m going to sing a hymn to Mikey. Him. Him. Fuck him
January 1st, 2013 at 11:58 am
@61 – Up North, Mikey the Large and In Charge has politely asked me to ask you to not take his name in vain. He is NOT related in any way to Mr. Moore and is, well, a bit whisker-hurt that anyone might think there is a connection, however tenuous it may be.
I would like to welcome the New Year by noting that Green Thumb is consistent with his comments, which I echo sincerely.
Every time Moore shows up some place, it’s to get attention and nothing else. He is the only person in the world who thinks he’s interesting. So good at pointing out what’s wrong with everyone else, but never takes a look at himself in the mirror. The words obnoxious, inflated ego, self-serving and tunnel vision describe him pretty well for him.
On top of that, hogs fear him.
January 1st, 2013 at 12:10 pm
Wherever Moore goes, feral hogs fear to tread.
January 1st, 2013 at 1:13 pm
@ #63- Because feral hogs know its open season
January 1st, 2013 at 1:19 pm
Asshole is “withdrawing” his support…. when the hell has he honestly supported the military? Beneath contempt, like most of his mocumovies.
January 1st, 2013 at 1:21 pm
So, can we label Moore the least interesting man in the world?
January 1st, 2013 at 1:23 pm
@66 was me. Sorry. My computer is having hissy fits.
January 1st, 2013 at 7:36 pm
Michael Moore can eat a bowl of dicks. Screw that fat mother-fucker.
January 2nd, 2013 at 8:02 am
Does it really count as a New Year’s resolution when you’ve already been doing it for at least 12 years?
But hey, maybe he’s right. After all, members of the military put themselves in life-and-death situations all the time. That’s nothing compared to being a lazy fat ass inhaling donut shops and making “documentaries.” Eesh, the only brave thing Moore ever did was visit an Occupy rally… though it’s not like he would’ve had much to worry about from passing through the rape fields.
January 2nd, 2013 at 9:34 am
I’ll tell you what bravery is–getting between Moore and the buffet line.
Just say “NO”, Mikey.
January 2nd, 2013 at 10:40 am
Ex-PH2: dunno about the least interesting man in the world – but he’s a lock for the title of “biggest asshole in Hollywood”.
Literally.
January 2nd, 2013 at 11:15 am
Typical Moore horsesh1t….make an outrageous statement, and then attempt to cover it with a lame ass explanation/apology….the only thing this cynical, lazy self aggrandizing pr1ck is passionate about is fatty foods….he is a disgusting fat body parasite.
Here’s hoping that you continue to stay irrelevant in the future Michael Moore, and that no one ever takes anything you say seriously as long as you live, which if you don’t follow number 10 on your list and walk some of that protective blubber off probably won’t be too much longer.
January 2nd, 2013 at 4:57 pm
@62 you beat me to it, although I would say he can eat a bag full of dicks and choke on the leftovers.
January 2nd, 2013 at 4:58 pm
err I meant @68 I fatfingered my phone.
January 3rd, 2013 at 2:24 pm
[...] Our buddy, Blanka sends us a link from the Huffington Post in which our favorite Orcan American, Michael Moore tries to explain what he meant the other night when he resolved in the New Year to “not support the troops”. [...]