CSM John Collier; Facebook commando

| January 2, 2013

Craig sent us another Facebook commando by the name of John Collier. I’m sure he has some time in the Army, but not enough to know what he’s doing when he puts together his phony finery;

John Collier

His profile says that he graduated from Purdue University in 1986, but he has hashmarks on his sleeve that add up to 30 years of service – that means he’d finish his service in 2016. Maybe the picture is from the future.

Collier also has a Special Forces tab and a Ranger tab on his left shoulder, but no jump wings. And it looks like he has foreign jump wings over his right breast pocket, but no US jump wings.

I have no idea what the white cord on his left shoulder is, maybe you know, but I don’t.

If the picture was more clear, I’m sure I’d find something else in there. Maybe this will piss off Detn8tr because of the EOD badge, and he can wait until I’m in the office tomorrow to complain. At least there’s no infantry cord or CIB, for a change.

Category: Phony soldiers

Comments (159)

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  1. IslandofMisfitToys says:

    The white cord is what space shuttle door gunners recieve after 6 missions…

  2. LostBoys says:

    In the “takes on to know one” category, on his FB page the “CSM” is sticking up for Sgt/Pvt. Pulsey:

    “So I salute you Sgt. Craig Pusley. Thank you!

    This is something I would like to see go viral. Let’s stand up and say Thank you to this man who didn’t think twice…he followed his heart and there is no crime in doing that.”

  3. NR Pax says:

    Good grief; the year isn’t even one week old and we already have entries in the next competition?

  4. Scrolling his friends list, he looks like a typical pervert. Also, noticed that he is “friended” with many VSOs. I wonder how many of them have looked at his Soup Sandwich photos. I think I will try to get him to pick up a friend request.

  5. Bam Bam says:

    The picture clearly IS from the future which explains the blurry nature of the photo. Inter-spatial photography is really still in its infancy… The glamor shots back ground has been around for ages though.

    I notice his pathfinder badge is SLIGHTLY angled… Does this indicate that he THOUGHT about serving in a pathfinder unit but never actually committed?

    Clearly a real American hero…. Yo Joe.

  6. Ex-PH2 says:

    That white cord is mine! That son of a nameless dawgwalker stole my aiguilette from my RTC(W) drill team locker!

    Where is he!?!?! I’ll yank that phony woollybear right off his flat face.

    I want my aiguillette back…now!!!

  7. NHSparky says:

    Jesus, it looks like Walt Disney puked on his chest.

  8. SJ says:

    No jump wings but he’s a pathfinder? Don’t think that is possible?

  9. NHSparky says:

    I also like his work experience at Meatball & Cooper’s Grill. Now I’m gonna go out on a limb here, but a person who (allegedly) has a degree from Purdue University, one of the most prestigious Engineering universities in the nation (hell, the world) might be just a wee bit overqualified to be a line cook in a choke-and-puke joint in Missouri.


  10. Veritas Omnia Vincit says:

    The white cord looks like our local high school marching band….he looks like a flute player…so probably that explains it.

  11. Checking his timeline, with a Highschool year of ’82, say he graduated at 18, wouldn’t that put him at just under 50 now? Does that photo not look like a 60+ person? Or would that 30 years of service as a “Leg” Pathfinder/Ranger/Special Forces/EOD, cause one to age prematurely?

  12. Twist says:

    @8, It is possible to be Pathfinder without jump wings. I was an alternate for a Pathfinder slot a while back and I am not jump qualified.

    No Infantry cord or CIB? Thank goodness for small miracles.

  13. 10th MTN NCO says:

    I checked AKO for any retired accounts and there isn’t a CSM listed by that name. I figured it was a long shot. He says his dates of service are from 74-05. I could be wrong but isn’t that the World War II Army of Occupation Service Medal he’s wearing? I love he listed the experience of line cook at Meatball & Cooper’s MKT. Who the hell lists that seriously? A 30 year CSM who is a graduate of Purdue University and he is a line cook. I got a feeling only half of that is true. Take a guess which half?

  14. NHSparky says:

    Not to mention he claims to have graduated high school in 1982, so we’re talking about him enlisting around the age of 10.

    I know the all-volunteer force was hard up sometimes, but jeez…

  15. Old Trooper says:

    As I said on FB to TSO about another phony, but needs repeating; they ain’t even trying, anymore.

  16. Chip@NASA says:


  17. PFDRbrendan says:

    Being in an active Pathfinder unit in Afghanistan, we do in fact have Pathfinder qualified Soldiers who are not jump qualified (you can thank the 101st Airborne’s Pathfinder school where the only prerequisite is Air-Assault). In fact a lot of dudes in the 101st get the school in without jump wings.

  18. Hondo says:

    10th MTN NCO: the Army of Occupation Medal was authorized for service in West Berlin until 2 Oct 1990. That one could could be legit.

  19. BamBam says:

    About a third of my pathfinder class wasn’t airborne. And this was 6 months ago. Just means they are the ones calling in the drops and manning the 34ft tower during pre-jump.

  20. Reaperman says:

    I thought I saw watermarks on the pic, but they were reflections. I probably shouldn’t look down on dreamcatchers, but hippies tend to have them.

  21. Copnkilt says:

    I see he has a Tomb Guard badge and the silver Schützenschnur also! Also lists the VFW Post 6722 in Lillington NC, anyone near that area to blast this phony!

  22. Nicki says:

    #20 – don’t you mean skidmarks?

    My god, this douche is a shitbag!!!!!

  23. 2-17 Air Cav says:

    Looks like he’s standing in front of a polished granite, tile wall. It also looks like the pic may have been taken through glass. That one reflected object looks like a Natve American something or other. What a mess.

  24. Seadog says:

    The white cord is a badge holder. Keeps all of his swipe cards together, for when he has to enter “secret squirrel” facilities. Not allowed to photograph them, so you tuck them into your tunic.

    And the picture was actually taken on an Indian Reservation. It’s a mugshot, from when he got arrested at the casino.

  25. Green Thumb says:

    This clown reminds me of Jon Candy’s get up from “Cannonball Run”.


  26. Green Thumb says:

    Its hard to tell, but one of those “pocket badges” look like a Tomb Guard Badge.

    Now that pisses me off.

  27. Twist says:

    No CSM would have a molestache that big.

  28. Twist says:

    Unless they are a tanker.

  29. Cacti35 says:

    I see that on his FB page he has the shared picture that is going around defending the phoney Marine Sgt. guarding the school in California. Kind of like “birds of a feather”.

  30. Mr. The Wolf says:

    Is there a chance this is NOT him at all?

    Due to some comments above, I looked a bit more closely at this- is this POSSIBLY a picture of a picture?

    Would that explain the reflections on the right side of the pic? And that he’s making stuff up about a fictional picture or something?

    A fraud inventing stuff about a fake or fraud.. now that’s got karma written all over it…

  31. martinjmpr says:

    Just to play devil’s advocate a bit – if he is wearing his jump wings centered on top of his ribbon stack, they might be under his lapel. AR-670-1 allows soldiers to “left justify” skill badges so they aren’t obscured by the lapel but it does not require them to do so IIRC.

    Also the Purdue graduation in 86 doesn’t mean he wasn’t in the army before that. I graduated from the University of Colorado in 2000 at the age of 38.

    The white cord looks like something a unit honor guard or flag detail would have used. Since this is a snapshot, not a DA photo, that might be legitimate as well.

    I’m not saying the guy’s not a faker, just that there could be legitimate explanations for the items Jonn focused in on. Without seeing his ribbon stack up close and/or more information on his biography, I wouldn’t call him out just yet.

  32. I asked for and was admitted to the Post 6722 group, and sent them a message asking for clarity on this guy. I wrote:
    Hello Post 6722. I asked to join the group, after finding a connection at a Facebook page, so that I could ask Y’all for your input on one John Collier. We who read at the Blog; “This Ain’t Hell”, are having trouble interpreting his ribbon rack, and finding inconsistencies in his timeline of service. A post has been made about him here: http://thisainthell.us/blog/?p=33452, and your input could well square it all away.
    We’ll see if the clouds can be cleared from this mess.

  33. Green Thumb says:

    This is real easy.

    Run the Tomb Badge number.

    Hardest badge to earn next to the Army Astronaut Badge.

    Real easy.

  34. Hondo says:

    For what it’s worth, here’s what I came up with for the guy’s ribbon rack. Guesses follow “cannot ID” when I could make one that seemed a reasonable possibility.

    Top Row: cannot ID (single ribbon, appears partially light blue, can’t see enough to fully ID)
    2nd Row: cannot ID (some blue, some white, can’t see enough to fully ID), MSM
    3rd Row: ARCOM, cannot ID (maybe AAM?)
    4th Row: GCM, AOM
    5th Row: cannot ID (no clue), cannot ID (maybe GWOTEM?)
    6th Row: cannot ID (maybe GWOTSM?)NDSM, ASR, OSR
    Bottom Row: cannot ID (NATO?), KLM (Saudi), KLM (Kuwait)

    Assuming the unidentified ribbons in the top two rows are (1) in correct order, and (2) have blue stripes as they appear, then they may be a significant issue. There aren’t too many ribbons of higher precedence than the MSM having blue stripes near their edges (or which are mostly blue) that aren’t decorations for valor.

    Hat tip to martinjmpr for ID of the NDSM (see comment 65 below).

  35. MCPO NYC USN (Ret.) says:

    Three Things:

    1. Looks like he wearing OSD and WH Staff Badges … only issued to those who are permanantly assigned and/or by letter designation. The photo is fuzzy, I could be wrong on the badges.

    2. The White Cord is authorized. The White Cord is authorized as appropriate wear, when the following criteria is met: you are a poser; have no idea about uniform regulations; and you have sufficient amount of white rope to fashion your own. The White Rope shall be brainded and tied using pull cords from all the inoperable Briggs & Stratton engines littering your front yard.

    3. This guy can’t even wear a neck tie properly!

  36. MCPO NYC USN (Ret.) says:

    Rope Colors:

    Best I could come up with:

    USAF: White – Chapel Assistant

    USA: White – Worn by Ceremonial Horses

    So, he was not in the USAF … therefore … he is a horse!

  37. martinjmpr says:

    Hondo: Not sure about the top row medal – could it be a Joint Services MSM? The one below and to the left of the MSM looks like maybe an AFEM. I can’t ID the one in between the MSM and the Army of Occupation medal, looks like it has a lot of brown in it (maybe an ARCAM?) The one at the bottom left looks like the NATO medal we got for Bosnia.

    To be honest, nothing jumps out at me that screams “fake” except for the Tomb Guard badge. As @31 says, this appears to be a snapshot of a framed photo – could be somebody snapped a photo of the current or previous CSM of the battalion/brigade and posted it to FB as “his” picture.

  38. Civilwarrior says:

    ANNNNd that is one dicked up Shutzenschnurr as we.. I know it was mentioned already, but DAMN.

  39. The White Cord is the Toudahang. It’s French for “When I get caught, I can use this cord to hang myself with”

  40. Twist says:

    @40, or it can be used to surrender with in a pinch case they are short of white flags. 🙂

  41. martinjmpr says:

    @40: Doesn’t look bad to me – that’s pretty much the way I wore mine.

    Of course, any good CSM would know that you can only wear one foreign badge at a time which means the foriegn jump wings + schuetzenschnur are a no-go anyway… 😉

  42. USMCE8Ret says:

    I’m no expert on Army uniforms, but isn’t he wearing the Schützenschnur incorrectly? (It’s on the right shoulder alright, but appears to be mounted inboard, not towards the outside of the shoulder tab as prescribed).

    I would think an Army SgtMaj with 30 or so years would know something like that.

  43. martinjmpr says:

    …and before someone says it, there may have been a time when you could wear more than one foreign award at a time but being as how the good CSM has a GWOT badge, this photo was definitely taken AFTER that time.

  44. martinjmpr says:

    @43: To be absolutely correct, yes, the Schutzenschnuer should be worn towards the outside but since the dress green jacket doesn’t have a button there, there isn’t any way to attach it (I guess you could use a safety pin?)

    FWIW I’ve seen a lot of folks wear their pretty much as shown in this pic, right or wrong. I think I’ve probably done it myself a time or two when the Shutzenschnuer was the only foreign award I had.

  45. MCPO NYC USN (Ret.) says:

    As # 24 Air Cav points out there is an Indian (Native American) Dream Catcher reflected in and on the glass of the photo. This may add credibility to his claim of being a Pathfinder or the Dream Catcher may be proof as # 5 Bam Bam noted that the photo was taken in the future.

    Either way …

  46. USMCE8Ret says:

    @45 – Got it… understood. Marines don’t wear the Schützenschnur, but soem are authorized to wear a version of the French fourragere if served with 5th Marines.

  47. Virtual Insanity says:

    Looks like Brit airborne wings:


  48. streetsweeper says:

    Checking Tomb Guards @ http://www.tombguards.org there is not a John Collier listed. Confirmed, that is a Tomb Guard badge, no blue infantry cord or discs. I forget but the white cords(?)on Right shoulder “looks” like the German Marksman(enlisted)and Left shoulder “looks” like an assignment as a W.H. Aide & Honor Guard (longer white cord designates him as W.H. aide), unit patch appears to be 101st ABN(Yea! the pukin’ buzzards get picked on this time)IF he is wearing CIB, it is hidden underneath the left lapel. Air assault, jump badges…think that is a Vietnam ribbon 2nd row, center.Not familiar with Pathfinders so…

    Background shadow (lower) is an entertainment center, square object directly over entertainment center is heater-A/C intake grille and two dream catchers. Individual taking picture is wearing brimmed hat, maybe Panama style, large frame picture on wall to subjects right, this was taken with cellphone camera (smudge outline of phone in hands, arm and elbow positions indicate held at chest high)