Re-Bateman on guns

| December 22, 2013 | 45 Comments

Earlier this month, we responded to LTC Robert Bateman when he wrote in Esquire magazine about taking guns from law-abiding citizens to stop Alabama fans from killing each other. In case you forgot, here was his solution;

The only guns permitted will be the following:

a. Smoothbore or Rifled muzzle-loading blackpowder muskets. No 7-11 in history has ever been held up with one of these.

b. Double-barrel breech-loading shotguns. Hunting with these is valid.

c. Bolt-action rifles with a magazine capacity no greater than five rounds. Like I said, hunting is valid. But if you cannot bring down a defenseless deer in under five rounds, then you have no fking reason to be holding a killing tool in the first place.

We will pry your gun from your cold, dead, fingers. That is because I am willing to wait until you die, hopefully of natural causes. Guns, except for the three approved categories, cannot be inherited. When you die your weapons must be turned into the local police department, which will then destroy them. (Weapons of historical significance will be de-milled, but may be preserved.)

Well, apparently, Lieutenant Colonel Bateman got some email that didn’t make him happy, according to his latest piece at Esquire (yes, they didn’t learn their lesson the first time);

OK, so let us start with the facts. A total of 2,324 emails came in following my post about guns, so far. I responded to every single one of them. This was in the wake of my essay about developing some sort of rational, peaceful, non-confiscatory way of removing guns from the hands of criminals and reducing the drain on our national resources. And, as one concerned about national defense, that is how I think about the issue. I cannot avoid contemplating the drain on our national resources of the 100,000+ Americans who are shot every year as anything but a national defense issue. We are a weakened nation because of this, and I want us to be stronger.

Unfortunately, a lot of people just want to shoot guns.

Yeah his essay was totally rational – restricting private owners to 19th century weapons and assuming that we only use guns for hunting. And, oh, yeah, we’ll dismantle your collection for your inability to continue breathing. That’s his idea of being rational. Of course, this infantry officer who hasn’t served in an infantry unit for the last couple of decades, blames the NRA for the threats against him (most of them aren’t really threats, anyway; the emailers claim that “if” Bateman tries to take their guns, they’ll defend themselves – not a threat unless he comes for their guns, actually).

But you know, what does he expect, really? He makes myopic and stereotypical accusations about gun owners, and we’re supposed to sit here and take it, because, you know he’s our social and moral superior who is concerned about an Alabama fan, and we’re not willing to take draconian measures as a result to avenge the death by one nutcase who will probably be punished by society for the murder.

Apparently, the non-infantry officer wearing crossed rifles hasn’t learned his lesson about controversy. And how very Leftist Liberal of him to blame the NRA for his hate mail, instead of his own stupid yammering.

Thanks to PavePusher for the latest link.

Category: Dumbass Bullshit

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  1. Dragoon 45 says:

    The tragic thing is that not one Senior Officer in the US Army has jerked a knot in his ass and muzzled him. To me, it really shows the moral character of Senior Officers in the Army today.

  2. Eric says:

    Sounds like he’s looking for his next job, to be a consultant in the MSM somewhere so he can spew their garbage and proclaim he’s military so he can speak to it intelligently.

    I need my HK .40 USP because Fuck you. That’s why.

  3. Eric says:

    @1 these are the same cowardly officers who said nothing when SECDEF Pinetta let service members march in a Political Gay Pride parade in their uniforms.

    Far too many who think they can make O-11 and one in particular who thinks he can make E-10 after being SMA…

  4. DrumGrunt says:

    Fine, my Bateman-style rational solution is rewriting the 1st Amendment to exclude LTC Robert Bateman.

  5. E-6 type, 1 ea says:

    People like this Bateman fucktard are the reason cops on the street have a more lenient ROE than troops in Afghanistan. Fuck you, Bateman.

  6. Old Trooper says:

    He’s definitely stuck on stupid.

  7. Sparks says:

    @3 Eric are you serious! I had to have missed that news item. Panetta really let uniformed, active duty military personnel march in a Gay Pride Parade. WTF is coming of the DoD! I wonder if he would have said yes if it had been a pro-life or pro-gun or pro anything conservative parade?

  8. Ex-PH2 says:

    So Bateman doesn’t like mail unless the writers pat him on the back? Isn’t that sad? What is the percentage of rabid antigun mugwumps in the general population?

    Remember, this is the same magazine that wrote a sob story last summer about a guy who claimed to have severe PTSD, but didn’t do the background research to confirm it, and made a fool of itself in one issue over what turned out to be a complete fabrication.

  9. OWB says:

    So, he has redefined the word “threat.” No surprise. Libbies use words and redefine them however they want, whenever they want.

    Unlike the rest of us, he defines a threat as anything which is not in lockstep with his views. Meanwhile, people who declare that they will kill him, have the means to do so, he gladly gives the opportunity but does not consider that a threat.

    Yeah, they prove every day that they are willfully ignorant.

  10. Sparks says:

    @9 Thank you OWB. You stated my thoughts better than I could have.

  11. OWB says:

    You are entirely welcome, Sparks.

  12. Eric says:

    @7 Sparks. Yes it happened shortly after DADT was repealed. The attached link is one of many stories about it.

    Even Senators asked him “WTF?” and just like the rest of the Obama administration, it was a “Go fuck yourself Senator” kind of thing.

  13. TSO says:

    Jesus he is a whiney little bitch.

  14. Mandrax says:

    1. Impose a mandatory minimum 25 year prison sentence for any violent felony, with NO possibilty of parole and NO possibilty of time off. Violent crime is a young man’s hustle and 25 years is long enough to take the piss out of his rope.

    2. Sterilize these people so they cannot pass their genes on and create more felons.

    Since #2 doesn’t remotely have a hope in hell of ever being instituted, for all intents and purposes let’s just consider option #1.

    Does this dickhead or any of the people who espouse the same thing he does, have ANY idea how much THAT would reduce violent crime? But I never, ever EVER hear them advocate CRIMINAL control. All they ever do is bitch about the GUNS.

  15. Sparks says:

    @12 Thanks Eric.

  16. Ex-PH2 says:

    I’d love to spend a half hour with each of his two ex-wives and get the REAL inside story on what kind of a control freak Bateman really is, among other things.

    These two articles of his say more about him than a simple anti-gun mindset. His reasons for mentioning national defense and the number of people shot every year appear to be obscure, but that acts as a deflection. He was not discussing removing guns from the hands of criminals in his first article: he meant to remove them from the control of everyone who had them. I do not recall his using the word ‘criminals’ in that first article. He then unconsciously contradicts himself in the 2nd article by saying he wants a ‘strong national defense’, which implies arming all citizens, NOT taking away their arms, and yet he refers to disarming criminals.

    Well, you can’t have it both ways. Either all citizens are armed, presenting a strong national defense, or all citizens are criminals if they want to be armed, and must therefore be disarmed, because they can’t otherwise be controlled.

    I’m not sure, but I think there is a distinct psychological slip in that, which may have something to do with his twice-failed attempts at marriage more than anything else.

    For that reason, I’d love to have a half hour with each of those two women who showed him the door.

  17. TMB says:

    “non-confiscatory way of removing guns from the hands of criminals ”

    Um, no dude. You said you wanted EVERYONE’S guns and were going to take them from our estate after we died. Whether we’re alive or not, if you take them from us or our survivors without our consent it’s still a confiscation.

  18. Just An Old Dog says:

    This guy needs to take the crossed rifles off his uniform and replace them with crossed vaginas.

  19. UpNorth says:

    @17, you beat me to it. I’ll bet that Bateman, and those like him, don’t even see the hypocrisy there.

  20. Ex-PH2 says:

    Talk to the women. They’ll tell you what’s really wrong with him.

  21. Nicki says:

    #18 wins the Internets!

  22. Green Thumb says:

    When was the last time this clown was in Alabama, Phenix City? Maybe Auburn/Opelika? Probably looking for some trim.


    I have an odd feeling that he does not “get” Bama.

    Hell, count the casualties over the years from the Iron Bowl.


  23. Eagle Keeper says:

    “Sterilize these people so they cannot pass their genes on and create more felons.”

    I’m all for SERIOUS penalties for violent crimes. But news flash, sterilizing violent felons won’t halt the appearance of more violent felons 20 years hence.

    It’s a sin thing.

  24. NHSparky says:

    Sounds like our boy here didn’t stop to realize the hole he’d dug for himself was more than deep enough already.

  25. Ex-PH2 says:

    He has a child?

    Oh, dear God, please turn her into one of the mouthiest, snottiest, brattiest little brats on the planet, someone who goes into screaming temper tantrums at her garrulous old fart of a father in some public place like a big shopping mall and calls him a stupid, fat, douchebag right to his face.

    After which, she takes all of her allowance out of her piggy bank, gets a bus ticket, boards the Greyhound, and goes out to Wyoming to live in a yurt with dairy goats.

  26. kracken says:

    You will never take my guns. Once all the criminals are disarmed. … I still will stick to my second amendment. .. Our for fathers gave us the right to bear arms…. I cant fathom some peoples thoughts. Of taking our rights away. What gives u the right u turds of life. Fire arms protect this great country.
    What kind of a world do u want to live in.. really.

  27. Just An Old Dog says:

    The guy is a NATO staff weenie on a long ( and for the Army’s sake, hopefully) his twilight tour. He did have his Battalion Commander counsel his ass as a young Lt about his penchant for writing long obnoxious articles. Of course an egotistical shit-sack like him totally misread it as “encouragement”. After his brief tour in the infantry he was made a permanent staff member and had his MOS changed, thank God. No command just tours as history prof at West Point and given a chance to further his education at Georgetown.
    Scariest thing about him is he writes his opinion pieces like he thinks he is writing an operations order that will be put into place. He admits having a problem and times with drinking and hates guns and southerners, which leads me to believe his wives both left him for a gun-totin’ good old boy.
    As for him reading and responding to 2,324 emails,,, he probably did a cut and paste or auto response at the most. Just think about the sheer volume of that many emails and the time it would take to read and respond to each one, taking just 15 minutes apiece it would take over 70 days, around the clock. A full out liar too.

  28. Flagwaver says:

    This guy is as much of an Infantry Officer as I am an Expert Infantryman. I was mistakenly assigned to take the tests and whatnot with the rest of my unit (I was attached as Supply to an Infantry unit). I passed all the tests, but was told by my CO that they couldn’t award the the badge because I had to be 11-series qualified… There were some Infantrymen who didn’t pass, for crying out loud.

    My point is, this guy may have gone to all the classes, but that means little to me. If he didn’t hold any kind of Infantry command during war, then he is just talking out of his fourth point of contact. He is nothing more than an over-promoted 2LT saying, “in my experience…”

  29. The Other Whitey says:

    I won’t comment on Bateman’s marital misadventures, as I know some great guys who are currently on wife # 4, 5, or 6. Nor will I speculate on his phallic deficiencies, since I myself will never be mistaken for a black dude in the dark (that’s why I married an Asian chick–she’s easily impressed! Just kidding, Honey, I love you!). These in and of themselves do not necessarily make him an asswipe.

    His conduct makes him a complete asswipe, as does his self-righteous attitude about it. Like most everybody else here (VWPussy notwithstanding), I strongly disagree with the bastard and have not been shy about expressing it. But since I’ve never been in the military, I have been reluctant to cast aspersions on his service until now, asswipe or otherwise. At this point, however, fuck it. If Bateman is the hardcore badass warrior poet that he claims to be, then I’m a Chinese jet pilot with a side job as a porn star. I have a strong feeling that I’ve fired more rounds this month than he has in his whole wasted life. I also feel like I’ve probably been a lot closer to mortal danger, and on more occasions than he has. Maybe I’m wrong about that, and somebody please correct me if I am, but that’s the feeling I get.

    I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again to Bateman and his ilk: Nut up or shut up. Put your money where your mouth is. If you want my guns so badly, come try and take them YOURSELF. Don’t try to send somebody else to do it for you like a coward. You man the fuck up and show up in person. MOLON LABE, motherfucker. Come get some. See how that works out for ya.

  30. TMB says:

    @26 It’s simple math. Even if only in his off hours he spent a couple minutes on each email it would require every free moment of his life from the time the article was published to now for his statement to be true.

  31. Nicki says:

    What gets me is this douche’s complete lack of respect for property rights. He thinks confiscating property after someone dies from his living descendants is not confiscatory? Seriously, what kind of Orwellian double-speak is that?

  32. Hondo says:

    Nicki: it’s the same Orwellian double-speak used to justify the estate tax that the Federal government and many states have. And it’s just as f**king morally wrong.

    Privately held legal property is just that – privately held legal property. If someone dies and has legal heirs, it is categorically morally wrong for the government to confiscate their property for no other reason than the rightful owner has died.

    This jackass Bateman probably never met a tax he didn’t like – so long as he wasn’t the one paying it, of course.

  33. Nicki says:

    Hondo, I bet you’re right. It’s just amazing to me that he actually thinks confiscating private property is “rational, peaceful and non-confiscatory.” I don’t see how it’s any of those things.

    And the whole “Oh, look! Poor me! NRA published a piece critical of me, so it’s their fault I’m getting death threats.” Frankly, I have my doubts that these are real emails he’s publishing. Obviously, if death threats were sent, it’s absolutely repugnant. Nonetheless, let’s hold millions of peaceable gun owners and gun rights advocates responsible for the actions of a few? Never did like the mass punishment thing.

    He’s got a huge victim complex, and he doesn’t like reaping the consequences of his actions. Plus, I guess he never learned the first rule of holes.

  34. Veritas Omnia Vincit says:

    If guys like this ran the world there would be no spicy food, no activities more dangerous than ping pong, and everyone would be driving a f#cking Prius….

    The whole problem with freedom for these types of people is the freedom….the freedom to be stupid, the freedom to eat what you want, drive what you want, and own what you want scares the f@ck out of these limp wrist sissies….likewise he thinks he has the right to free speech, but he absolutely doesn’t like anyone else expressing their free speech if that speech runs counter to his version of Nirvana….

    The founding fathers were revolutionaries who were willing to risk their lives and their fortunes for the chance to live as free men without government interfering in every aspect of their lives. Bateman and his ilk fail to understand just what that means, these were not the kind of men who sat in their easy chairs hoping the government would fix everything, these were the kind of men who told you to your face what they thought of you good or bad and figured you were man enough to hear it and not be a giant swaddled pussy when you did.

    Live free or die is pretty bold statement, Mr. Bateman has no idea what that really means he just thinks it’s a quaint statement from the “olden” days that was put forth by kindly old white haired men….he has no idea it was a statement filled with venom and promise of violence to England should she try and continue to force her will on the colonies…Mr. Bateman should ask for his college money back because he clearly got f@cked out of a decent education.

  35. Nicki says:

    Oh, and the comments are PRICELESS! Small dick references, Bateman trying to castigate Tom Kratman, who chews him up and spits him out… it’s hilarious stuff!

  36. A Proud Infidel says:

    Bateman needs to replace the “U.S.” on his uniform with dots of chicken shit!! Hey, how about this, let’s outlaw firearms theft and murder? *OOPS!*, that’s already illegal, and it didn’t prevent Sandy Hook, did it? Placing bombs in trash cans is outlawed, but it didn’t prevent the Boston Marathon bombing, right? Bateman is the kind of TOCroach that could suck the glazing off of a jelly doughnut at 500 meters!

  37. PavePusher says:

    He’s been challenged to provide evidence of the “death threats”. So far, he’s suggested taking the “debate” to private email.

    Heh…. so much for good faith and transparency.

  38. Nicki says:

    Kratman is POUNDING THE SNOT out of him! It’s actually embarrassing.

  39. James Dunn says:

    Five bucks says this moron is looking to get promoted and writing this PC crap is one of his tickets up.God I’m glad I’m retired…

  40. Jacobite says:

    Kratman rocks.

    Bad bad bad decision to try and brace him in a war of words.

    10 will get ya 20 that Kratman could beat the snot out of him physically as well.


  41. CaS6 says:

    But, but, he was so well loved by his troops, and so good at managing violence, that they all called him “the Old Master.”

    (I stole that from a commenter on the Liberty Zone)

  42. Eagle Keeper says:

    No, that was “the Old MasterBATER …”

  43. A Proud Infidel says:

    I’m sure his subordinates’ favorite nickname for him was “Old Jack OFF”!

  44. butch says:

    This cockbite Bateman bragged about being very good at planning and executing violence. So we should tremble at and yield to his spewing.

    He fails to realize he does not have a monopoly on that skill. There are more than a few of us bitter clingers who are also adept at this, likely better than he is,and have spent much more time, much closer to the pointy end of the spear than he has.

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