Valentine’s Day/Weekend Open thread

| February 14, 2014 | 180 Comments

Sparks wants a place to give you all some candy and flowers, so here you go for a slow news afternoon;

The Washington Times says that background checks don’t stop many firearms purchases. Well, yeah, because why would a criminal who knows he can’t buy a gun bother going through background checks?

The Washington Post reports that the Obama Administration will allow banks to do business with pot sellers.

Shotgun Joe Bite Me says that there is no longer a Republican Party. But, then, he’s been wrong on every other issue since the beginning of time.

The FAA blocked your flower deliveries by drone, says Fox News.

Pinto Nag sends a link to NBC News which reports that 70 people were murdered by thugs with machetes in the Congo.

ohio sends a link from the Daily Mail reporting the death of Ralph Waite, of The Waltons fame, who was also a Marine after WWII.

Ex-PH2 celebrates the NBC News link regarding pizza coming to MREs.

And finally, someone sent us a picture of Kenneth Boyle in an OIF cap – you know anther one of those wars he didn’t go to;

Boyles

Category: Administrative

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  1. Sparks says:

    @151 Enigma4you It’s all good. I made my rendezvous with agent “Bemis” I forgot to tell you guys the pass phrase for MI-6. It was “the goose is loose” repeat “the-goose-is-loose”. But it was a successful drop so I am safe back at headquarters now.

    @150 Twist it was the thread on Boyles at post # 189 where t started my humiliation. :D

  2. clamsgotlegs says:

    I have it on good authority that Sparks went to the dentist this morning.

  3. Enigma4you says:

    @152 , Glad everything came out ok.

    I need food, There may be a trip to waffle house in the near future.

    Thinking about getting the Henry out and killing some targets. But I will prob just sit in the recliner and watch old movies

  4. Sparks says:

    @150 Twist it went on through post #225 when I found…much to my embarrassment after calling OWB “sir”, that OWB…wait for it…is a woman too. :D I had done it to myself twice! :D So now, I never assume anything about gender unless it is known or very obvious.

    Like the time in the line at the grocery store around 1980 when I asked the lady in front of me, who was very thin but had a bulge in just the right position, “when is your baby due?”, happily thinking she would love talking about the forthcoming little blessing. To which she replied in a terse tone and angry expression, “I AM NOT PREGNANT!” So from that day till now I have a new philosophy on those situations. It is, even if I see their water break right before my eyes, I will assume they peed their pants before I will make ANY comment about pregnancy. If they say, hey I’m having a baby, then and only then, will I render assistance. Just a little protocol tip for all you guys who like me, have had occasion to jump to conclusions without knowing. Wow I do it to myself every time!

  5. Ex-PH2 says:

    Yes, Sparks, just remember that lovely woman making eyes at you across a crowded room might be a crossdresser.

  6. Sparks says:

    @153 clamsgotlegs Thank you for that video. Yes I have had many a little David moments. “Is this real life?” Laughed my head off. I really appreciate you guys here at TAH and of course you ladies as well. You endure or should I say, “suffer fools” such as I so often. Thank you all so very much from an actually pretty good and harmless guy like me. At least that is what others tell me. Self assessments can be sometimes…skewed, if you know what I mean.

  7. Sparks says:

    @156 Ex and yes that happened to me at Mardi Gras 1973. Three of us followed a beautiful backside and set of legs for two blocks until we caught up with it at the intersection. Then…we see the five o’clock shadow! The horror…the horror. So we drift, a little drunk, into a bar and as we order a round we get to looking and the only picture in the place is one of Mark Spitz in his swim suit with the 7 Olympic medals on over the bar. We began to look around and talk amongst ourselves and there at a table are four guys and ANOTHER “gal” dressed to the nines with a prominent chin and lots of makeup, with the “shadow”, again sticking through. Just young service guys us, so the bar keep comes over quickly and says, “hey, if you boys don’t like what you see here then get the hell out!” We did.

  8. Twist says:

    When I was deployed and my daughter was three years old her and my wifee were waiting in the hallway at the post hospital. Every time someone would walk by in uniform she would ask real loudly “is that my daddy”. I found it funny, but my wife was horrified.

  9. Sparks says:

    @159 Twist I have only one son. I am as proud as I can be of him. He is taller, way smarter and better looking than me. Big blessing there on all those counts for him! He was born after I served but when he was three and four and the wife would bring him to the airport to pick me up from work travels, he would often run and hug the leg of the wrong dude in his little sense of excitement that, “Daddy was home!”. I sure do miss those years with him. They were some of my proudest and finest moments and experiences. If I must say so myself, I really shined then and all because of a little fella I still love more than life itself.

  10. Sparks says:

    An interesting little thing I found. World’s biggest caliber rifle in action. A .905 Really looks like it’s kickin’ those guys around.

  11. Sparks says:

    And…an Anzio 20MM rifle. Pretty cool.

  12. Ex-PH2 says:

    Another joke forwarded to me by Shep, for those of you who are feeling sorry for yourselves:

    There was a man who lost one of his arms in an accident.
    He became very depressed because he loved to play golf. One day in his despair, he decided to commit suicide.

    He got on an elevator and went to the top of a building to jump off.

    He was standing on the ledge looking down and saw this man down on the sidewalk skipping along, whooping and kicking up his heels.

    He looked closer and saw that this man didn’t have any arms at all.

    He started thinking, “What am I doing up here feeling sorry for myself? I still have one good arm to do things with.”

    He thought “There goes a man with no arms skipping down the sidewalk so happy, and going on with his life.”

    He hurried down to the sidewalk and caught up with the man with no arms. He told him how glad he was to see him because he lost one of his arms and felt useless and was going to kill himself. He thanked him for saving his life and said he knew he could make it with one arm if the guy could go on with no arms.

    The man with no arms began dancing and whooping and kicking up his heels again.

    He asked, “Why are you so happy anyway?”

    He said, “I’m NOT happy. My balls itch.”

  13. Sparks says:

    @163 Now Ex…m’lady! That made me laugh my ass off!!! Again a big thanks to Shep for a great sense of humor!

  14. Green Thumb says:

    @163.

    “He said, “I’m NOT happy. My balls itch.”

    Then he should call Paul (of the Ballsack) for relief.

    A real pro in that area.

  15. Pineywoods NCO says:

    My weekend thought: There are too many asswipes up this year for the Stolen Valor Tourney….we might have to expand to 128 or even gasp…256 asswipes to vote for this year.

  16. Pineywoods NCO says:

    I forgot, I need to put a proposed solution…

    SMITE THE ASSWIPES, LORD GOD!! PLEASE!!

    Thank you.

  17. Pineywoods NCO says:

    Just great…

    http://www.katc.com/news/us-army-sergeant-arrested-for-possession-of-marijuana/

    A NCO arrested for trying to deliver APL’s daily supply of medication.

  18. Sparks says:

    If Jonn’s reading…can we keep the Open Weekend/Valantine’s thread through Monday? After all, it is a holiday and technically still part of the weekend. :D

  19. Sparks says:

    Good Morning America and all you TAH ladies and…dickweeds out there! Hope everyone is doing well. I know there is a lot of news today on brand spanking new posers so this thread won’t see much activity. Anyway, have a great Monday and a great day off if you get it off. Know I am thinking of all of you with my fondest (ladies) and kindest (dickweeds) thoughts! :D

  20. Ex-PH2 says:

    I meant to post this on Friday, but I forgot. Sorry.

  21. Army Medical says:

    [b] william derek church is a complete dildo[/b]

  22. Army Medical says:

    [b]William Derek Church and Kiaya Louise Church are morons[/b]

  23. Army Medical says:

    ok I got it. Eat my ass Derek Church

  24. A Proud Infidel says:

    [i]I heard a rumor that William Derek Church the roly-poly Round Ranger likes to sniff toilet seats at highway rest stops![/i]

  25. Sparks says:

    @171 Ex Thank you I have always loved that song. Happy Belated Valentine’s Day.

    @172 clamsgotlegs LMAO at the “cat curling”! Thank you and Happy Belated Valentine’s Day to you as well.

  26. Sparks says:

    Just for grins and giggles.

    The Lone Ranger and Tonto went camping in the desert. After they got their Tent all set up, both men fell sound asleep.

    Some hours later, Tonto wakes the Lone Ranger and says, ‘Kemo Sabe, look Towards sky, what you see?

    ‘The Lone Ranger replies, ‘I see millions of stars.’

    What that tell you?’ asked Tonto.

    The Lone Ranger ponders for a minute then says,’Astronomically speaking, it tells me there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Astrologically, it tells me that Saturn is in Leo. Time wise, it appears to be approximately a quarter Past three in the morning. Theologically, the Lord is all-powerful and we are small and insignificant. Meteorological, it seems we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. What’s it tell you, Tonto?’

    “You dumber than Obama voter. It means someone stole the tent.

  27. Ex-PH2 says:

    Heehee. Sparks, check your e-mail.

  28. Sparks says:

    @179 Thanks Ex!

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