Andrew Chadbourne; phony Ranger

| November 22, 2016

Andew Chadbourne (1)

Someone told us about this Andrew Chadbourne fellow who made the mistake of telling his jump school stories to a former Blackhat (Blackhats instruct that particular course of endeavor). The BS flag went up.

Chadbourne Facebook

He’d have you believe that he’s one of these two steely-eyed killers;

Chadbourne Facebook picture

That these are pictures of him at Ranger School;

Chadbourne Ranger claims (1)

Chadbourne Ranger claims (3)

Not according to the National Personnel Records Center;

Andrew Chadbourne FOIA

HRC couldn’t find even one moment of active duty service.

Category: Phony soldiers

Comments (104)

Trackback URL | Comments RSS Feed

  1. Veritas Omnia Vincit says:

    Poor little twatwaffle….he wanted to be a tough guy until he found out you actually had to be tough to get through….so now he just tells lies to people hoping to impress someone for some reason…how much does your existence have to suck for you to make shit up to tell people?

    Dull eyed slackjawed dipshit with a meaningless existence trying to matter somehow….

    • rgr769 says:

      Dull eyed slack jawed dipshit with a mouth full of chew or shit. His photo makes him look like he just too a bite out of that shit sammich he made himself. Which one is supposed to be him in the Ranger School photos. I’m not seeing it. Anyone ask him what is his ranger class number?

    • desert says:

      He watched the commercial, put Two pinches twixt his lip and gums and “viola” he thinks he is a Ranger lol

  2. MCPO NYC USN Ret. ain't goin' no where says:

    Nuff said!

  3. rb325th says:

    Rump ranger more like it. Guess you need to make up stories about your life, when your greatest accomplishment to date has been floor mopper at the local glory hole. heard he used his tongue as the mop though, so he has that going for him.

    • Instinct says:

      Well, it looks like he’s holding a mouth load in the top picture so I guess he’s good for something.

  4. Ex-PH2 says:

    Delusions of epic something or other! Seems to hit all these guys at one time or another, does it not?

  5. 2/17 Air Cav says:

    He’s a stoner. Check out his FB page through his name link.

    • Silentium Est Aureum says:

      I was wondering what got him kicked off the med deck at MEPS, assuming he even got that far.

  6. sj says:

    Florida. Again.

    • Green Thumb says:

      If only Phil Monkress had a son…

      Looks like this turd will be parking cars at All-Points Logistics while “servicing” Phildo.

      • "An Honest Navy Dude" says:

        Phildo has extraordinary experience pumping out BS about his SEAL experience in Columbia and Somalia. He serves as a fine role model for phony rangers and employees at APL.

        • Hack Stone says:

          Phil is an inspirational leader. He must be, in order for him to get such loyalty from an All Points Logistics executive that the man would commit career suicide on the internet in order to protect Phil’s lies.

  7. He posted, “After R.I.P. 30 days B4 first deployment”. That is a good one, when after R.I.P, there is a 62 day block of instruction to take the course. Pure phony assed dummy.

  8. Claw says:

    Jarrett Gimbl style cum load mouth and a bedroom selfie.

    100% legit.

  9. Graybeard says:

    Andrew Chadbourne is not a Ranger.
    Andrew Chadbourne has not served.
    Andrew Chadbourne is a liar.
    Andrew Chadbourne couldn’t jump out of a treehouse.
    Andrew Chadbourne is a phony.
    Andrew Chadbourne is a wannabe.
    Andrew Chadbourne is full of BS.

    • Instinct says:

      Graybeard, are you trying to say that

      Andrew Chadbourne is not a Ranger.
      Andrew Chadbourne has not served.
      Andrew Chadbourne is a liar.
      Andrew Chadbourne couldn’t jump out of a treehouse.
      Andrew Chadbourne is a phony.
      Andrew Chadbourne is a wannabe.
      Andrew Chadbourne is full of BS

      I’m just wondering

      • HMCS(FMF) ret says:

        I’m pretty sure that Graybeard is trying to say that:

        Andrew Chadbourne is not a Ranger.
        Andrew Chadbourne has not served.
        Andrew Chadbourne is a liar.
        Andrew Chadbourne couldn’t jump out of a treehouse.
        Andrew Chadbourne is a phony.
        Andrew Chadbourne is a wannabe.
        Andrew Chadbourne is full of BS

    • AW1Ed says:

      Sorry guys, dropped sync there. Please repeat all after:

      Andrew Chadbourne is not a Ranger.

      Thx.

      • Graybeard says:

        Repeating all after Andrew Chadbourne is not a Ranger:

        Andrew Chadbourne has not served.
        Andrew Chadbourne is a liar.
        Andrew Chadbourne couldn’t jump out of a treehouse.
        Andrew Chadbourne is a phony.
        Andrew Chadbourne is a wannabe.
        Andrew Chadbourne is full of BS

        I repeat:
        Andrew Chadbourne has not served.
        Andrew Chadbourne is a liar.
        Andrew Chadbourne couldn’t jump out of a treehouse.
        Andrew Chadbourne is a phony.
        Andrew Chadbourne is a wannabe.
        Andrew Chadbourne is full of BS.

        Copy? Over.

        • Sarge says:

          Didn’t have the batteries in my hearing aide, did you say:

          Andrew Chadbourne has not served.
          Andrew Chadbourne is a liar.
          Andrew Chadbourne couldn’t jump out of a treehouse.
          Andrew Chadbourne is a phony.
          Andrew Chadbourne is a wannabe.
          Andrew Chadbourne is full of BS

          I repeat:
          Andrew Chadbourne has not served.
          Andrew Chadbourne is a liar.
          Andrew Chadbourne couldn’t jump out of a treehouse.
          Andrew Chadbourne is a phony.
          Andrew Chadbourne is a secret squirrel buttsex warrior.
          Andrew Chadbourne is full of BS.

        • AW1Ed says:

          Good copy GB! AW1Ed reads back:
          Andrew Chadbourne has not served.
          Andrew Chadbourne is a liar.
          Andrew Chadbourne couldn’t jump out of a treehouse.
          Andrew Chadbourne is a phony.
          Andrew Chadbourne is a wannabe.
          Andrew Chadbourne is full of BS.

          I say again:

          Andrew Chadbourne has not served.
          Andrew Chadbourne is a liar.
          Andrew Chadbourne couldn’t jump out of a treehouse.
          Andrew Chadbourne is a phony.
          Andrew Chadbourne is a wannabe.
          Andrew Chadbourne is full of BS
          Aw1Ed out.

          • ex-OS2 says:

            Andrew Chadbourne has not served.
            Andrew Chadbourne is a liar.
            Andrew Chadbourne couldn’t jump out of a treehouse.
            Andrew Chadbourne is a phony.
            Andrew Chadbourne is a wannabe.
            Andrew Chadbourne is full of BS.

            I say again:

            Andrew Chadbourne has not served.
            Andrew Chadbourne is a liar.
            Andrew Chadbourne couldn’t jump out of a treehouse.
            Andrew Chadbourne is a phony.
            Andrew Chadbourne is a wannabe.
            Andrew Chadbourne is full of BS.

            Did I read that right?

        • Eden says:

          Copy 5×5. I read back:

          Andrew Chadbourne has not served.
          Andrew Chadbourne is a liar.
          Andrew Chadbourne couldn’t jump out of a treehouse.
          Andrew Chadbourne is a phony.
          Andrew Chadbourne is a wannabe.
          Andrew Chadbourne is full of BS.

          How copy, over?

  10. Deplorable B Woodman says:

    One has to wonder what else of an unsavory nature is lurking in the “bushes” (pun intentional).
    As we all know, Stolen Valor is just the Rancid Cherry topping the Shit Sundae.

  11. HT3 '83-'87 says:

    B.S. detector pegged at 100%. Used a little Google Image search and found the picture that he claims as himself on the site ‘MMA Fighter vs Navy SEAL’. Second picture down its the same photo as ‘Average Navy SEAL’…unless of course he’s the ultimate badass…SEAL/Ranger

    Link is shown below:
    http://comicvine.gamespot.com/forums/battles-7/mma-fighter-vs-navy-seal-1678287/

    • AverageNCO says:

      Yeah reverse image search gets them every time. My search pulled up this page which credits the photo to the DoD as a stock photo of a SEAL.
      You gotta love a guy who tries to prove he’s a Ranger by posting a picture of a SEAL.

      • jonp says:

        I wondered why he claimed to be a Ranger but had a SEAL picture up. Seemed odd to me but then again you never know what shit someone is coming up with.

        That must be the ultimate Tower Of Power

    • rgr769 says:

      Thanks for finding that. I thought it was SEAL gear in the photo. My later comment is now irrelevant. This phucker isn’t even trying at posing.

      • HT3 '83-'87 says:

        Yes…very weak effort. No cammo costumes, no ‘fruit salad’, no bikers vest/patches…just some stank-ass hat and a pack of lies.

        If you’re gonna pose…go big or go home!

    • M1Hound says:

      I have seen that same “SEAL” photo elsewhere. It is a stock Navy promo piece.

  12. Sparks says:

    Shitbag! If you’re gonna bullshit, at least make it plausible. You ain’t even trying hard Andy.

    Queef!

    • Graybeard says:

      Too ignorant to know what is plausible.

    • Andrew Chadbourne says:

      PLEASE DO YOUR HOMEWORK ON DSS/S.A.DIVISION, and you’ll see why I had to just use army as the b.s.
      S.A.D. Required to put Army/Airforce/Marine training schools I had attended.

      • ex-OS2 says:

        Sure thing Drew.

        Way to go reviving a dead thread.

      • Silentium Est Aureum says:

        Uh, dude?

        Or is that, “Dud?”

        Many folks in here (not me) have been involved with the Spec Ops community across all branches of services.

        You REALLY don’t want the attention you’re bringing upon yourself.

        And way to bring up a zombie thread that had been dead for 3 months. Again, this is not the kind of attention you want, but if you insist upon bringing it on yourself, who am I to stop you?

        Fuckstick.

  13. Corndog Charles says:

    I turned him in, so big thanks to POW network. I emailed a bunch of other groups and no one took interest. This guy is a total turd and it was quite obvious he had never served.

    • Andrew Chadbourne says:

      No-One is interested because my S/C is has has been from beginning of my 7yrs.In. I tend to not have time to deal with b.s. online slander. VERY ENTERTAINING COMING FROM ARMCHAIR FORMER SERVICE MEMBERS. LOL

  14. Carlton G. Long says:

    I actually defended this fellow the other day. Someone told me he saw Andy eating a peanut butter and c0ckmeat sandwich and I said, “That’s bull…Andy doesn’t even like peanut butter.”

  15. HMCS(FMF) ret says:

    Another ghey whey slurping, two-hole inspecting, peter puffing and fluffling, taint tickling, “Call of Booty – Anal Buttsekks Warrior” playing rump riding ranger.

    ANDREW CHADBOURNE, your Google famous now, BYTCH!

  16. Combat Historian says:

    A phony little dickless balless pansy…

  17. A Proud Infidel®™ says:

    Another meat-gazing booger-eating thumbsucking dildoheaded no-load pus-nuts fungus-faced DINGLEBERRY of a sniveling toad turd-brained WANNABE! I’m sure it’s only a matter of time until he runs his mouth like that to a REAL Ranger and he gets some wall to wall counseling.

    • Bernie Hackett says:

      Proud, excellent work, as usual. Master of Invective major, with you as instructor. Required for all NCOs, postgraduate.

    • Sarge says:

      Can’t find the like button on this 🙂

    • Andrew Chadbourne says:

      Emil me your address. I WOULD LOVE TO MEET YOU AND TWO OF YOUR FRIENDS UP CLOSE AND PERSONAL. AND I HAVE BLADDER CANCER FROM THE D.U. ROUNDS MY TEAM PUT IN THE SOIL FROM DUTIES IN AFGHAN’s NEIGHBORS TO THE EAST.

      • ex-OS2 says:

        Your sentence structure is horrific. When you screw up sentence structure, there are consequences cocksucker.

        “Emil me your address. I WOULD LOVE TO MEET YOU AND TWO OF YOUR FRIENDS UP CLOSE AND PERSONAL”

        Really, what for cupcake?

        • Andrew Chadbourne says:

          Bring amyone you like choad blower how about getting up close and peraonal with a 7.62 lupua…Cockmuncher

          • Silentium Est Aureum says:

            7.62 Lapua?

            That’s interesting. I know Lapua ammo comes in 7.62mm, but I was always under the impression the most popular caliber for a Lapua rifle was .338, or perhaps a REAL sniper could clarify?

            • Jonn Lilyea says:

              Yeah, he’s an idiot. I happen to have a few hundred rounds of .338 Lapua Mag in my gun safe for my Remington. None of them have depleted uranium in the 250 grain bullets.

              • Silentium Est Aureum says:

                And to go a little further, the only COMMERCIALLY available Lapua Magnum ammo is the .338 and the .300.

                Reading up, the 7.62 (.308) UKM cartridge was never put into production, although a few casings exist where gunsmiths will neck it down and put .30 cal bullets into it.

                So yeah, there’s that.

              • Silentium Est Aureum says:

                Another thought, Jonn–this guy reminds me of a certain idiot who claimed a certain member of the DRG got his house all shot up with “.222 Ruger” ammo.

                That would be funny, if it existed, although I found this:

                http://www.ruger.com/micros/ammo/index.html

                I might like to try a box of the .45 sometime. 1307 fps muzzle velocity? That should pack a punch, even if the round is only 118 grains.

      • A Proud Infidel®™ says:

        OOOOOH, so NOW we have a case of butthurt, o pisspants twinkle-toed thumbsucking bedwetting booger-munching pus-nuts little no-load sugarcakes cupcake of a Sparkle Pony? You’re resurrecting a dormant thread which will steer more searches this way, don’t believe me? Just pull the cocklebur out of the pantyhose you’re wearing and GO GOOGLE YOURSELF!!

      • Green Thumb says:

        Andrew Chadbourne = Whiny Loser.

    • Andrew Chadbourne says:

      Caleb and I’d like to challenge you, and your best spotter to a 10 round comp w/my smallest m-24 hybrid with floating barrel… Like U.S.M.C. Snipers use here in Fl. Your safety IS A GUARANTEE

  18. Friend S. Wilkins says:

    He works out at Planet Fitness, too. Imagine that.

    Here’s a sick video I just found. And I mean sick. NSFW

  19. JimV says:

    It’s top secret AD time.

  20. NotaLeg says:

    Congrats Andrew Chadbourne, your famous! You got what you asked for- attention. Now reap what you sow.

  21. Skyjumper says:

    “Andrew Chadbourne” (Pronounced: AN-droo CHAD-born)
    is a “stank ass Army Ranger poser” (Pronounced: STANK Azz ARM-ee RAIN-jar POSE-er) from “Florida” (Pronounced: FLOOR-eh-dah).

    Enjoy your newly founded Internet fame, RAIN-jar.

  22. ex-OS2 says:

    Cocksucker.

  23. A Proud Infidel®™ says:

    Andrew Chadbourne and Otto Gimbl work wino ballsacks behind bus stops as Dutch Rudder Gang “Prospects”.

  24. CA_SGT says:

    Once again, friends list left public. Messaged almost EVERYONE. Even think I sent his girlfriend a link here. Maybe this one will respond.

    • ChipNASA says:

      Good jerb CA_SGT

      LOL and his shit went POOF just like his “military career”
      HAHAHAHAHAHAH *gasp* HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
      /Fuckstick

  25. CW says:

    The douchebaggery is strong with this one.

  26. rgr769 says:

    If that is him on the right, in camo paint behind that Airsoft H&K MP-5 look alike, I have the following observations: First, he appears to be wearing SEAL gear with some type of SCUBA equipment. He is wearing the old forest pattern BDUs and a forest camo booney hat the Army hasn’t issued for the last 20 years or more. Second, he attributes the photo to service in Afghanistan; I doubt any US Army personnel have been issued & worn forest camo BDUs in the Afghanistan AO. Anyway not after 2004. But someone who has actually been there can correct me, if I’m wrong about those BDUs in the photo being in use in the A-stan in the past 12 years. But I guess he is claiming a seckrit squirrel mission in some lake in Pakistan, a land locked nation.

    • BigHead Tom says:

      I was just remembering the shit filled Konar River running by our firebase near A’bad in 2002. I wouldn’t want to wade it much less immerse my head.

  27. Corndog Charles says:

    Isnt it obvious what happened here. It’s just like all the “Seals” around here in Florida. It was wartime and cock strong dudes like him are needed at the frontlines and no time for things like BUDS, Ranger School, hell even MEPS.

    • Green Thumb says:

      That’s why when it came time to step up, they all stepped into the line for the All-Points Logistics job fair.

  28. Green Thumb says:

    And the more that I look at his picture above, the more and more I am convinced that his mouth was just filled with semen before the picture was taken.

    I wonder if he just “felched” his way to stardom?

  29. Dash Riprock says:

    Holy shit is he cross-eyed? Likely a sniper or a decorated marksman for sure.

  30. Andrew Chadbourne, non RANGER, phony piece of shit, has blocked me from his facebook page, or shut it down completely. So, he knows about this post, but can’t find the guts to stop by to leave a comment. This loser surely squats to pee. What a puss.
    Andrew Chadbourne has not served.
    Andrew Chadbourne is a liar.
    Andrew Chadbourne couldn’t jump out of a treehouse.
    Andrew Chadbourne is a phony.
    Andrew Chadbourne is a wannabe.
    Andrew Chadbourne is full of BS.
    Andrew Chadbourne is as dumb as a stump.

  31. HT3 '83-'87 says:

    I see that his FB page is now like his military service…non-existent. I bet these guys hatch some story about how ‘foreign operatives’ hacked their account, and they had to shut it down in the ‘interest of national security’. Of course, the intrepid readers that send these articles to everybody on their friends list make it hard for guys like him to continue the lies. BZ to the team here and all the readers that take these chumps to task.

    • HMCS(FMF) ret says:

      He’s one of those “sekrit skwirrl” rangers… CIA/NSA/EIEIO trained types. All his missions are classified as “TRIPLE TOP SEKRIT – CLASSIFICATION FELCHING MONGOOSE”. Shit’s so sekrit that he has to use flash paper to wipe his ass when he takes a dump…

      To reiterate what Graybeard broadcasted on TAHnet:

      Andrew Chadbourne is not a Ranger.
      Andrew Chadbourne has not served.
      Andrew Chadbourne is a liar.
      Andrew Chadbourne couldn’t jump out of a treehouse.
      Andrew Chadbourne is a phony.
      Andrew Chadbourne is a wannabe.
      Andrew Chadbourne is full of BS

      I repeat:
      Andrew Chadbourne has not served.
      Andrew Chadbourne is a liar.
      Andrew Chadbourne couldn’t jump out of a treehouse.
      Andrew Chadbourne is a phony.
      Andrew Chadbourne is a wannabe.
      Andrew Chadbourne is full of BS.

      OUT!

  32. I will be spending around 8 hours with the Ranger Instructors and leadership at the Florida Ranger Camp today, seeing Blackhawk jumps, a party in the World Famous Gator Lounge, and then the Battalion Thanksgiving Dinner in the DFAC. If, during that time, we run out of meaningful conversation, I will be sure to enlighten them all on this turd by telling them:
    Andrew Chadbourne has not served.
    Andrew Chadbourne is a liar.
    Andrew Chadbourne couldn’t jump out of a treehouse.
    Andrew Chadbourne is a phony.
    Andrew Chadbourne is a wannabe.
    Andrew Chadbourne is full of BS.
    Andrew Chadbourne is as dumb as a stump.

    He is far to insignificant to bring up unless there is nothing else to say, such as:
    ” While I was in the bathroom this morning shaving, I looked at the toilet bowl, that I had neglected to flush, and saw an Andrew Chadbourne floating there.”

    • BigHead Tom says:

      The Gator Lounge…where my good cracker friend Adam (now deceased) said “…a beers a beer…” as he ordered a “Genius” (Guinness) beer. Good Times.

  33. Carlton G. Long says:

    This guy’s heart broke when Radio Shack went belly-up because the people who worked there were the only ones gullible enough to be deceived by his tomfoolery.

  34. robert says:

    where is this pecker-snot? south florida I hope. Bo was 3/75, I was 1/75…would love to meet him…

  35. Andrew Chadbourne says:

    Seriously LOL. I’M IN CHEMO FROM MY DUTIES. SO HOW BOUT YOU AND YOUR BEST SPOTTER MEET UP WITH ME AND MINE…
    WE’LL SEE WHOSE FULL OF SHIT. SORRY IF YOUR UNEDUCATED ASS CAN’T FOLLOW. MY FORMER COMPANY Had us traing with the best of EVERYONE and MY FORMER SAS BUDDY WILL BE MINE. I’LL EVEN LET U USE OUR EQUIPMENTAFTER

    • ex-OS2 says:

      As I stated before, your sentence structure is horrific. I highly encourage you to enroll in a remedial grammar class immediately.

      You are incoherent and digging up a three month old post.

      You may just wanted to take a deep breath, step back, grab your Barbie dolls out of your toy box and go drool in the corner.

      When you wake up tomorrow, contact your former company and maybe you guys can have a reunion circle jerk.

      • Mick says:

        He’s talking about USMC snipers up above, and now he brings in the SAS. Hopefully the Polish GROM, German GSG-9, and the French Foreign Legion will also make an appearance in here today.

        The depth of this revived assclownery is astounding. WTF?

        As Nancy Kerrigan would say:

        ‘Why? Whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy?’

    • ex-OS2 says:

      “I’M IN CHEMO FROM MY DUTIES”

      From exposure to DU? You are a moron.

    • MONGO says:

      EVEN MONGO TALK SMARTER THAN YOU, SPELL BETTER TOO!

  36. Silentium Est Aureum says:

    Jesus regrets dying for you, Andrew.

  37. OIF '06-'07-'08 says:

    Well, what do we have here Andrew,
    http://florida.arrests.org/Arrests/Andrew_Chadbourne_29581893/
    Or here,
    http://florida.arrests.org/Arrests/Andrew_Chadbourne_23986135/
    Or here,
    http://florida.arrests.org/Arrests/Andrew_Chadbourne_23083111/
    Or here,
    http://florida.arrests.org/Arrests/Andrew_Chadbourne_5711406/
    Or here,
    http://florida.arrests.org/Arrests/Andrew_Chadbourne_5461358/
    Or here,
    http://florida.arrests.org/Arrests/Andrew_Chadbourne_23055187/
    And here,
    http://florida.arrests.org/Arrests/Andrew_Chadbourne_5247630/

    Damn dude, you must enjoy those cock meat sammiches to keep going back to jail, and your latest arrest is over a felony. Why do you come here bragging about possessing firearms when you legally can’t? It seems your brain is a 1 watt light bulb.

  38. Silentium Est Aureum says:

    And once again, he disappears. Maybe he only gets a couple of hours of Internet access at “the home.”

    • ex-OS2 says:

      Drew must have picked up a few more shifts sucking cock behind Flying J dumpsters to cover the cost of chemotherapy treatments for his exposure to depleted uranium.