Timothy Bean, phony SEAL

| August 31, 2017 | 74 Comments

Our partners at Military Phonies send us their work on yet another phony SEAL, Timothy Bean. He doesn’t like talking about being a SEAL, well, except on Facebook;

But, then when he was busted, turns out that he was wearing a Trident and advising people on how to train to be a SEAL to honor a friend;

He was a SEABEE, a Steelworker Second Class;

Eight years of service, three years at sea, but I guess that wasn’t good enough for Facebook. His Facebook profile disappeared last night.

Category: Phony soldiers

Comments (74)

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  1. sj says:

    Florida. Vest. Doo rag. Bike. No dog???

  2. 1610desig says:

    “10 percent of BUDS is physical”. Now that’s some mentoring for success! You just use telekinesis to get that huge fucking log over your head

  3. QM1 says:

    Looks like he started out as a SM and cross-rated to SW when the Signalman rating went the way of the dinosaur in ’04/05.

    Then he cross-rated to assclown soon after getting out of service all together.

  4. Combat Historian says:

    He needs to be taken to the woodshed and whupped by a bunch of SEALs for lying, then again be taken to the woodshed to be whupped by a bunch of Seabees for dishonoring the Seabees…

  5. CB Senior says:

    Bootlicking D-bag.
    So few of us Bee’s to start with, he was already a select few. Maybe not always Guts and Glory work but Honorable and sometimes legendary.
    Threw it all away for what?
    Definitely singing the hymn for him.

  6. Ex-PH2 says:


    He’s got ape-hangers on that hog!!!!

    Has he run into any real biker gangs yet?

    What an ASSHOLIO!

  7. Former EM1/SS says:

    You know, he kind of looks like the type to show up here and start making threats and excuses. I kind of hope so, and have popcorn at the ready.

  8. Graybeard says:

    I’m getting to the point that unless Marcus Luttrell tells me personally that so-n-so is a SEAL, my BS meter pegs.

  9. Daisy Cutter says:

    The fact that he was a Police Officer for three years does not instill confidence. Seems he missed the class on “Code of Honor.”

    I wonder how many of his fellow officers he told that he was a Navy SEAL?

  10. STGCS Ret says:

    Notice the BACA patch on his vest – If he is a member of BACA (Bikers Against Child Abuse) I am sure they would have a problem with anyone in their group misrepresenting themselves. Especially since a large number of them are veterans.

  11. Silentium Est Aureum says:

    Why the fuck don’t some of these assclowns put on a 1% patch and go hang out with some Mongols, Vagos, Banditos, etc?

    Self-curing problem.

  12. Rick says:

    What a dickbag. I would to throat punch that cocksucker for bringing shame to the Bees.

  13. Chaos says:

    I served with Bean in Iraq making cages for “detainees” who later turned into ISIS.
    Its too bad he’s lying about being a SEAL but at least he isn’t some loser in academia protesting against troops.

  14. MCPO Ret. in TN says:

    He could be in the same biker club with another phony SEAL – Phil Monkress

  15. Skippy says:

    Honorable service record and he flushed it down the crapper


  16. CM2 non-SCW says:

    I was over in Iraq with this assclown! Biggest piece of shit I’ve ever served with! He was an SW who couldn’t weld for shit! I wanted to kick his ass then and now I really want to fucking throttle him!!!!

  17. W2 says:

    Hey, you guys get off his nuts, at least he’s trying. Old Steve isn’t trying at all with his 120 kills and that’s it. Steverino doesn’t have a doo rag, doesn’t have a vest and no HD. At least old Beanie boi here is trying and he deserves some respect for being a total douchebag and properly collecting all the necessary douchebag bling. And you guys know there is a dog involved somehow. Hat’s off to you Beanie boi for the enviable effort in becoming a total douchebag, now ESABATM.

  18. A Proud Infidel®™ says:

    A Prospect Member of the DRG?

  19. TF-BA says:

    His sleeve roll in that photo basically screams “I’m a dirtbag, kick my ass”.

  20. Ex-PH2 says:

    I keep wanting to post a Mr. Bean video here and call him ‘Timmy’.

  21. OWB says:

    Sock puppet on aisle 4.

  22. Keepin' It Real says:

    I heard that Timothy Bean, the fake Navy SEAL, can drink anyone under the table…

    … that’s is, if we are talking about jizz, not alcohol.

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