Elijah Warden; phony Green Beret, phony Vietnam Vet

| October 21, 2017 | 83 Comments

Our partners at the Guardians of the Green Beret share their work on this Elijah “Eli” Warden fellow who claims that he’s a Sergeant Major, a Special Forces soldier who was wounded and served in Vietnam.

You just know he’s legit because he plays in a band and he wears his Green Beret on stage – and, oh, there’s a vest involved. What kind of jerk would do all of that if he wasn’t legitimate;

Well, a jerk like Eli would, I guess. He spent about seven months in the Army during Vietnam, but he never left the US. His only award is the National Defense Service Medal. His rank when he left was Private not CSMAJ, whatever that is.

Category: Phony soldiers

Comments (83)

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  1. RM3(SS) says:

    Those pictures just scream Peter Puffer. Real steely eyed killer of manmeat sandwiches there.

  2. O-4E says:

    He’s been at this phoniness a long time

  3. Mason says:

    Love the thousand yard stare in that last pic. Lol

    Nobody ever wants to play dress up as a Spec4.

    • rgr769 says:

      Well when you only made it to E-1 in the real world, you might as well go big when you are making up shit for your world of make believe. Besides we all know no one wants to cross the E-4 mafia. They are the ones who control what goes on paper or into the computer about you.

    • E4 Mafia For Life. says:

      I wear my sham shield proudly. But really, E4 is the most awesome rank in the ARMY.
      I passed on my set – not my nads, those are kept in my wife’s purse – of shields to my daughter.
      They protect her from soldiers that want more than Motrin and hydration.
      On the back side of her shields are the rubber letters, “RTD.” Which she stamps on all sick call slips.

  4. RGR 4-78 says:

    Yup, someone watched “The Deer Hunter” one too many times.

    • rgr769 says:

      I suspect he watched his VHS version so many times he wore out the video tape in the cassette. Too bad he hasn’t practiced the Viet of the Nam national sport, according to that fabulist movie. His brain-pan definitely needs more air.

  5. Claw says:

    But, But, he qualified Expert on the P-38 his last trip out to the 25 meter rifle range.

    I’m calling totally legit./s

    • Actually, there really is a P-38 that can be fired.

      It was German pistol during the Second World War.

      But, I doubt he’d know that.

      I remember our drill sergeant instructing us to always keep our P-38 on our dog tag chain, and so, I always did.

      But, nowadays, my Leatherman multi-tool makes the P-38 unnecessary.

      • mr. sharkman says:

        Strangely enough, some Army SF guys carried German P-38s in Vietnam.

        MSG Jerry ‘mad dog’ Shriver is one example.

        • rgr769 says:

          Several members of the 22nd SAS Regiment of the British Army also carried them back in the 70’s when I went through their Close Quarter Battle Course.

        • just some feller says:

          I have a photo of my father (Det B-33) carrying an MP-40. He got some 9mm rounds from some OGA fellers living just outside Camp Widder. In his first ambush using the MP-40 one round went off and the “Schmeisser” jammed. He found out he was given 9mm shorts instead of 9x19s. He traded the MP-40 for some sheets of plywood for the club roof.

          ARVN later attacked his Ruff-Puffs and demolished the club!

          JSF

          • RCAF-CHAIRBORNE says:

            Im suprised the significant gap in the double stack single feed MP40 mag. Must have had a hell of a time loading it too, as the 2mm shorter cartridge would up-end against the follower.
            However, Im sure that metric cartridges were not that popular in the US at that time.
            .45acp is much better anyway!

      • Graybeard says:

        Dad preferred the Walther P38 he captured from a German officer to the Colt 1911 they had in WWII. He said he shot better with the P38 than he could with the 1911, and he was rated Expert on the 1911.

        Its still a sweet pistol.

    • FuzeVT says:

      The Australians have a modern day P38 they get in their chows. It is somewhat larger than the P38 and has something that could be used as a spoon on one end (in extremis only, no doubt).

      They call it the FRED. Fucking ridiculous Eating Device.

  6. His FACEBOOK page has all photographs and references to Special Forces or military service deleted.

    • OOPS ! ! !

      I just found this on his FACEBOOK page:

      “I have been riding Harleys since I got home from Nam!For 35yrs.Fell on some hard times,and currently needing back up.I have dreamed of finally going to Sturgis.I hope I make it while still above ground!ELI”

    • Here’s another undeleted FACEBOOK post:

      “I 0700 here in the Republic of Texas,Memorial Day.To many in America this day it is a continuation of a partying,and a drunken bliss! To me it is a time of rememberance! I reflect on my anscestors who gave all in the civil War,My grandfathers who fought in WW1.My uncles,and my father who voluntered to fight in every War thereafter.My youngest Uncle who fought in NAM.Then myself in NAM.I gave some,but but many gave all!As I raise my glass,filled with the hair of the dog.I look into the flame of the candle,and I can still see their faces.All my dear Brothers who have gone on before me. Then the pain comes!Followed by the courage,and strength that they give me that surpasses this life.The best thing they would have me do is continue to march on!Their Courage and HONOR keep me going!”De Oppresso Libre”Let Dear Lord this fire inside of me define the Airborne Slogan”ALL THE WAY”Untill we meet again my Brothers!CSMJ.Eli Warden.”

      • NotaLeg says:

        What an unbelievable load of horse shit. I don’t know any actual veterans that talk that way. Why do phonies always talk and act like they are the star of some cheesy melodrama on Lifetime?

        • FuzeVT says:

          He also had a guy in his platoon from Greenbow, Alabama. Of Elijah he said the following:

          “Somebody in his family had fought and died in every single American war. I guess you could say he had a lot to live up to.”

    • I found some more references to Special Forces, Viet Nam, and the rank of Command Sergeant Major.

      I’m guessing he’s attempting to delete everything, but with so much posted, he’s forgotten about some of it, and that’s probably why it’s still there.

    • The Al says:

      Nope, pictures are still there- not his timeline that I saw, but they’re still under the photos tab

  7. A Proud Infidel®™ says:

    Cocksucker.

  8. Deplorable B Woodman says:

    Texas, eh? There oughta be someone close by that can pick him up and make him disappear into the bottom of a deep backhoe dug hole in the back 40 somewhere desolate.

  9. Tony180A says:

    Never ceases to amaze me. There is no doubt in my mind the other two guys wearing berets are phony as well. Blue Infantry cord and disc….they never learn. I have some former Company SGM’s that would beat the chevrons off this mutt!

  10. 26Limabeans says:

    Martial arts again.

  11. MCPO NYC USN Ret. says:

    Mustache’ and flag position.

    LEGIT!

    Correction: Multiple’ Mustaches’.

    Most LEGIT!

  12. 3/17 Air Cav says:

    Nice dress greens, it looks like he’s been living the lie for decades! If he wants to continue with “dress up, one of two things need to happen. Either lose some weight, or get a new blouse. Those buttons are about to explode and hit someone in the eye!

  13. Rosalee says:

    Phony Vietnam vet?…You mean like Blumenthal who can’t tell the difference between in country and served during the war?
    “We have learned something important since the days that I served in Vietnam”….
    and his in country service?
    USMC(R) units in Washington, D.C., and Connecticut from 1970 to 1976

  14. Defender says:

    My neighbor is (ret) Sgt Maj Herman”Snake”Spencer. A real Sergeant Major SF
    “Green Beret”. From the Nov 1969-70 Son Tay raid. He’s no bragadocious fellow. Just the real deal operator. He’s 83 yrs old and I’m quite confident he’d pound this turd burglar into a bloody pulp. What a jerk off. Should be kicked in his vag.

  15. Ex-PH2 says:

    Oh, you guys really missed a good one. Remember when someone (Radar?) was a Colonel Corporal on MASH?

    Well, this guy was a CSMAJ – a Colonel Seargent Major. That’s one step higher on the bloviation rank ladder.

  16. Ret_25X says:

    ffffffffuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck….

    a Cuck Sergeant Major……….

    You usually have to go to the Pentagon to find one of those….

  17. 1610desig says:

    That beret is rather outsized…is he Chef Boyardee?

  18. Jeff LPH 3, 63-66 says:

    At least Florida is out of the loop on this one.

  19. 3/17 Air Cav says:

    Nothing spells success more than having your picture taken in front of your beat up 1980’s Chrysler 4 door with black reversed rims!

    With that Chrysler, he’s most definitely high speed, low drag!

  20. Combat Historian says:

    Any chance our CSMAJ here was an AIT trainee discharge? Only 6 months and 12 days of service makes me think that’s a possibility….

    • rgr769 says:

      Basic was 8 weeks back then and AIT at Polk was I believe another four, so I’m thinking he likely broke his taint and the medical people decided it was permanently broke and sent him home. Or, he could have stepped on his crank and received a General Discharge for the good of the service. The fact he left as an E-1 is indicative of that.

  21. Sj says:

    No dog? No doo rag? No bike? Not from Fla?

    Not even trying.

    • rgr769 says:

      But, but he says he has been riding Harleys for over 35 years. Maybe he has had some boyfriends named Harley.

      • He has a sheep named Harley and a pair of wellies to stick the animals hind legs into so it won’t runaway.
        “SQUEAL>>>BA,ba Bah little sheep
        As a veteran and a guitar player he disgusts me, I never wore any USAF clothing to a gig, in fact I haven’t worn any uniform bits since I discharged , oh so long ago, now every time I see some old guy dressing up in a uniform I become suspicious that it must be Halloween and some how I have lost track of time

  22. Mick says:

    ‘…and, oh, there’s a vest involved.’

    There’s always a vest involved.

    Always.

  23. Tomorrow, there will be a Medal of Honor ceremony at the White House, which I’m certain will be televised live.

    But, I don’t know what time the broadcast is.

    Do any of you know?

    CAPTAIN GARY MICHAEL “MIKE” ROSE, UNITED STATES ARMY (RETIRED) is the REAL deal!

    In September of 1970, he was a Special Forces medic on a classified mission, and was not allowed to talk about it until 1998.

    He just told everybody that he was a mail clerk when he was in Viet Nam.

    All those phonies who claim there’s no records of their heroics because everything was secret (but, which they repeatedly tell everybody about!) can now see proof that there ARE records kept of highly classified missions, and the guys who are really performing those missions never say a word about it to anyone.

    Gosh, gee whillikers, 1970 is when I was in the old Republic of Viet Nam, so this really has my interest.

  24. Pineywoods NCO says:

    He claims to be from Texas??

    What part is he at?

    And Elijah, read carefully….you are a disgrace to my state of Texas. GET THE FUCK OUT!

  25. ChipNASA says:

    Donkey Turd.
    I’m not even working up a sweat for this knob

  26. Green Thumb says:

    I love the “A-Team” era photos up top.

    Just waiting for the Black Van to roll up and BA gets out a tosses this turd.

    Mr.T!

  27. Cris says:

    “I have been riding Harleys since I got home from Nam! For 35 years.” That would be 1978…didn’t know we had folks there during that time. Qh, wait, SF…that explains it, super secret.

  28. Green Thumb says:

    “He is an old hippie and he don’t know what to do, should he hang on to the old or grab on to the new”.

    Dude looks a lot “Hacksaw” Jim Duggan in that last picture.

  29. A Proud Infidel®™ says:

    Maybe his claimed rank of CSMAJ” stands for “Cock Sucking Major Ass-Jackoff”?

  30. smoke-check says:

    Always with the n’th degree black belt BS with these turds. Is it a generational thing? Exposed to too many Chuck Norris movies in their formative years? oi

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