Dennis Pasquale; phony SEAL

| February 18, 2018 | 145 Comments

Our partners at Military Phonies send us their work on this Dennis Pasquale fellow. I thought about just posting the above picture and leaving it at that. I mean, how much more proof do you need than that picture? But that wouldn’t be fair, I suppose. Besides, there are tattoos and motorcycle club vests involved. And illiteracy;

The Navy says “Who?”

I’m sure that if his Legion post checks, they’ll find a very illiterate forgery. He locked down his Facebook page.

Category: Phony soldiers

Comments (145)

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  1. HMCS(FMF) ret says:


  2. 11B-Mailclerk says:

    That sad inDUHvidual should avoid at all costs any Japanese flagged vessels.

    • A Proud Infidel®™ says:

      He still bears the scars of his last trip to the beach when some Greenpiss hippies dragged him so far out in the water he got harpooned three minutes later by a fishing boat full of Japanese Tourists!

    • Cheese Eater Mcblobfish says:

      Tell me about it! I can not take a nap on the beach without someone trying to drag me into the water! As if that was not enough, some Nigerian dude stole my blog name for use as his username:

      If he has made any money by claiming to be a prince, or someone working for someone working at the embassy, I am going to sue him!

  3. A Proud Infidel®™ says:


    Looks like another MEAL Team Six Buffet Assault Commando has been discovered, this one looks like a very highly experienced Day-Old Jelly Doughnut Assassin as well!

  4. 2/17 Air Cav says:

    Thank goodness there was more than one pic b/c the first one, alone, had me wondering which one was Pasquale.

  5. 1610desig says:

    Even sporting those signature ST6 shapeless fat boy jeans….convincing!

  6. Wilted Willy says:


  7. 2/17 Air Cav says:

    IF he had served, he would have joined the Navy and IF he had joined the Navy, he would have been a SEAL and IF he had been a SEAL, he would have gotten a UDT/SEAL ballcap. He just skipped the first couple of steps is all.

    • mr. sharkman says:

      90%+ of the ball/tactical (there’s a couple of important differences) ‘Teamguy’ caps actually worn by Teamguys are of types that only another Teamguy would ID it as a Teamguy cap based on imagery, symbols, inscriptions, etc.

      The remaining 10% I’ve seen worn have had ‘UDT’ and/or ‘SEAL’ and/or Team designation but they’ve been cases like a Vietnam or Korea era Teamguys having such a cap bought for them by their grandkids, etc. Even then they are rarely worn (from what I have seen, which is admittedly a very small sampling).

      So in short – and my judgement only – a younger guy wearing a ‘mainstream store/outlet purchased’ cap with ‘UDT/SEAL’ printing on it tends to make me suspicious and will usually result in a couple of immediate questions from me.

      It’s only happened a couple of times over the years and in every case the cap has been removed, mainly because I had neither the time nor inclination nor the situation to push the issue further.

  8. RetiredDevilDoc8404 says:

    Be nice now, he’s a celebrity – he was the inspiration for the Death Star AND was Pizza the Hutt in Spaceballs (keep saying bad things about his “service” he’s gonna send out for YOU).

    • Ex-PH2 says:

      Oh, bring it!! Please, bring it!!!

      What’s his excuse for having man boobs? Plastic surgeon mess up the job?

      • 26Limabeans says:

        His “friends” have been spiking his near beer with Estradiol.

      • mr. sharkman says:

        Another Teamguy I probably know in real life but only know ‘of’ online pointed out the ‘man boob’ rule and it seems a solid ‘go-to’ for detection of phony Teamguys.

        Plenty of older Teamguys pack on some pounds as they age, especially when they can’t keep up the training regimen they lived by in their youth.

        But even the heaviest, out of shape former Teamguys I’ve seen, no matter their age – NONE of them had serious ‘man boobs’. The online Teamguy was right in my opinion that the ‘serious man boob presence’ almost always was indicative of a phony (former) Teamguy.

  9. 26Limabeans says:

    I see this guy in Walmart all the time.
    He parks in a handi cap spot and waddles over to the powered cart bin. Has people load food into the cart and EBT’s his way out the door.
    Drives up to his vehicle and pops the trunk so people can help load the goods. Leaves the cart in the middle of the lane and drives off with his Viet of the Nam bumper stickers, Trident, SF patch and MACVSOG decal. /s

    • Mick says:

      You have a guy like that at your local Walmart, too?

      I thought that we were the only lucky ones to have heroes of such stature in our midst…

      • 2/17 Air Cav says:

        I hate stores. I really, really hate stores. I hate the fat people. I hate the skinny-as-a-rail meth freaks. I hate the coughers and sneezers. I hate the cell-phone users. I hate the people who knock stuff from shelves and pretend they didn’t see what everyone else did. I hate the crammed aisles and the people who leave their carts wherever the hell they want, just so long as they’re blocking others. I hate the store music. I hate the gazers who stare and stare at products for no apparent reason. I hate the lard asses in the fatty carts. I hate the piercing beeps of the carts backing up. I hate people who don’t know or don’t care that, in this country, we walk on the right side of an aisle. I hate people who pay by check and those who exclaim ‘Oh! I forgot X!’ while their stuff is being scanned, so they go get X and make everyone else wait. I hate erroneous self-checkout messages (“Please remove the last item…”) and people who have no clue how to use them. Really. I hate stores.

        • Frankie Cee says:

          2/17 Air Cav; I feel your pain. But, (in my Billy Mays voice), WAIT!!! There is more!!!. Go to Walmart’s boat aisle. Buy one of those 1lb Air Can horns. Pay for it, keep the receipt handy, then place the horn in that little basket near the handle. When you approach the turds, just give the horn a blast. Guaranteed it will bring you so much pleasure that it may test your bladder retention ability. I have broken up over a dozen family reunions, and block parties that I have found plugging up the aisle that I want to negotiate. Be indiscriminate with it, use it on all classes, races, and body shapes so you cannot be accused of discriminating.

          • 2/17 Air Cav says:

            Oh man, I love it!

          • AW1Ed says:

            That is absolutely evil, FC.


          • Hack Stone says:

            When Hack was a contractor at the Pentagon, he would frequently get robocalls that he his application has been reviewed, and wouldn’t you know that he qualifies for a loan. So Hack would press 1 to speak to a qualified loan officer, and when the answered, it was “Fire in the hole!!!” with a blast from the air can horn. It originally had it handy for any former Air Force personnel that used the word “basically” in Hack’s presence. When Hack was growing up in the Corps, that was known as the “B word”, and use of it was severely punished. Alas, much like other traditions, it has fallen by the wayside. When Hack worked down at Quantic, quite a few Marines, to include LtCol’s, used the dreaded “B word”.

            • 2/17 Air Cav says:

              Nice, Hack. I get the calls from India daily and will press 1 to speak with a representative just to say, “I eat your cows. Fuck you!”

              • A Proud Infidel®™ says:

                I get the call from India as well and as soon as I hear their accent I start preaching to them about the Great Flying Spaghetti Monster, I’ve gotten them to tell me to FO and go to hell in as little as thirty seconds before THEY hang up!

                • Dunklewitz says:

                  I’m kind of an American with German ancestry but whey the call I speak to them in their own accent and that really blows their mind, especially when they hear my dreamed up response. I only do two languages, but hell on wheels when it comes to accents.

        • rgr769 says:

          One of the things I hate is these morons at my gym that sit on a weight machine endlessly staring at their cell phones. I guess these people who apparently don’t have to work in the middle of a weekday have important emails they must immediately read.

      • HMC Ret says:

        People on those motorized carts are freaking damn near lethal. Don’t get in the way of some of them. They seem to believe that being handicapped affords them certain privilege not granted to us mere mortals. Those in WallyWorld are the worst. Those in Publix are the best.

        Speaking of grocery stores, I read yesterday that Winn Dixie’s holding company is considering bankruptcy and might close as many as 200 stores.

        Bankruptcy doesn’t necessarily mean they lock the door and go away forever. I could be they will try to reorganize their debt and stay in business. I had no idea Winn Dixie was in trouble. I never shop there. It seems to be a dirty place and reminds me of KMart, another place I never enter. We shop Publix and the Commissary. Can’t beat prices at the Commissary, especially on meats and fruits/veggies.

        We will travel further and pay more to shop in a clean environment and be treated well. By using Publix BOGOs, we save substantially each week. Winn Dixie also has BOGO, but I think it’s a shithole.

        • Daisy Cutter says:

          First time I encountered someone on a cart, I let them get ahead of me in the checkout line. I thought they were disabled. Then, I later realized they were just fat and lazy. I don’t let them ahead of me anymore. I’ve become a mean, unsympathic bastard.

          Full disclosure: I’d be lying if I said that there have’t been times I’ve thought about using one of those motorized carts.

        • Jeff LPH 3, 63-66 says:

          HMC Ret; Publix has the monopoly down here, but a little expensive for some of the over 70 retirees only on social security. Once in awhile I use Winn Dixie but mainly Publix which is in walking distance of my place.

        • Casey says:

          My mom used to shop at the local Kresge’s regularly. It was next door to a Krogers.

          They both vanished a long time ago. That mall is full of trendy stuff like American Eagle now.

          The lunch counter was especially nice.

    • Ex-PH2 says:

      I have yet to encounter anyone in a motor cart at my Walmart, but I did run into a young lady who was in a wheelchair trying to get something out of the freezer case. She was having difficulty with the door. She only wanted one thing, which was out of her reach, and was nice and polite about it.

      She’s the kind you don’t mind helping out.

      These others? Milking the “special needs” cow is a punishable sin, in my view.

      • 26Limabeans says:

        “She’s the kind you don’t mind helping out”
        You bet. You know the real deal when you see it. I have a special needs sister that has taught me well. The fakers are obvious and plentiful.

  10. HMC Ret says:

    Lately looks as if morbid obesity is a prerequisite for SEAL fakery.

    How often we see these turds in a MC group? Is no one in these groups equipped with the stones to at least question them? A few questions would have outed this lard bucket.

  11. HMC Ret says:

    Is he fondly gazing at male genitalia while softly caressing the hand of Winnie the Pooh?

    I would have been convinced of his SEAL status if he had a mutt, doo rag and thousand yard stare. I also see no POW patch.


  12. Dustoff says:

    Please Lord, just once. I want to open TAH and see “Stu Thorndyke…phony supply Sgt. “You lost your canteen cup?, that’s a statement of charges mofo”!

  13. Deckie says:

    We just had a 2nd Electrician on my last ship claim to be a SEAL…. in front of ACTUAL former SEALS aboard as our security detail for transit through high risk waters…. the thrashing he received provided me much amusement on an otherwise uneventful trip.


    • AW1Ed says:

      That is called a “Vivid Learning Experience” and is likely never forgotten.

    • Deplorable B Woodman says:

      Pictures? Pretty please?

    • A Proud Infidel®™ says:

      Oh Man, I bet he had a “Come to Jesus Moment “ times ten!

    • mr. sharkman says:

      Please elaborate on what you witnessed? I’m certain we could all use a good chuckle. 😉

      Also, do you know the name of the security company? I’ve got a lot of former Teamguy Brothers working similar contracts, maybe some of them were involved. Would love to chat them up if they were. 🙂

      • Deckie says:

        Trident Security is the company we use for the HRW detail, usually a four-man team each time we go through.

        I was asking the SEALS some questions out of curiosity, seeing as it isn’t very often in my career we get to hang out with them. This much is certain; they do NOT conform to what these jackasses pretending to be SEALS think a real deal Special Warfare operator is. Six of the eight that I saw in 5 months were dare I say kind of nerdy guys, well read on many subjects and fun to talk to about history and music (one was even a gardener with his own crops for sale.) No tattoos, no war stories and not what you expect to see in movies. Regular dudes you’d never suspect were in the teams or even in the military.

        Well anyway I was asking them some questions while the electrician was repairing (breaking) something on the bridge when he started butted in answering everything himself. The team leader on the bridge stopped and said, “what do you know about this stuff?” To which electro replied “I was in the teams myself… probably before you were even in.”

        Three of the four guys pretty much ignored the guy, thinking he was just completely retarded (which seems accurate.. he was a terrible electrician and did display symptoms of mental instability.) The older guy in the group, a retired Chief, exploded on him when after asking for his BUD/S class, the fool said, “I opted out of the special operations side of it when I finished schooling.” Most of the security detail said if this had been on dry land and (in the Chief’s case) twenty years ago they’d have kicked the shit out of him for making the claim.

        Even they said they own no shirts, hats, stickers, decals, license plate covers nor anything else that says they are/were SEALS. The Trident on the uniforms in their closets are all they have. And unless asked, they don’t bring it up. Heck, a Chief Engineer I sailed with on a naval transport was a SEAL back in the day, and unless you ask him directly all he tells people is that he “was in the Navy.”

        • mr. sharkman says:

          Thanks for the additional data and the account.

          I do indeed know some guys working for Trident (I’m fairly certain I know exactly whom your ‘gardener’ is). Seems like a good company, they get guys coming back for repeated contracts which is a good sign compared to some of the sketchier contracting companies out there.

          I’ll ask around re: the phony bust. And your description of the guys is spot-on. If there was a way to sticky your description of the former Teamguys and their responses it would be useful – but I don’t know if it’s feasible or possible on TAH.

          Again, thanks.

  14. Ex-PH2 says:

    It took a few minutes to investigate the alien language used by this person, but I think I finally got a handle on it.

    It’s Farspikkin’. He’s from the one-man per ship* space navy of planet Zibrodeia, and his rank was rilly luiteniente commodoor.

    *No Zibrodeian ship can lift off with more than one of him aboard.

    Luitenient = should be spelled luiteniente, and it’s the 3rd to last lowest rank in the Zibrodeian Commode.

    There are no SEAL teams in the Zibrodeian Commode, but there are beeyatched whales as well as giant squids that would make Earth’s giant squids look puny.

    That’s all for now, plus one of these: just once, I’d like to see a full squad of these lounge lizards run through the screening process. A female candidate recently made it to the 3rd week of screening. I doubt they’d make it past the first 24 hours. And that’s just the screening sessions.

  15. This guy is probably 1/2 my age and about 4 times larger !!
    check’s off on most of the fake valor criteria.
    What is with these wannabee “heroes” ?
    Too scared to go thru and accomplish BMT, but willing to spew BS about being some sort of “special ops Jelly Roll Rambo” ?
    I don’t get it ?
    Back in the 70’s a lot of civilians didn’t want anything to do with us wearing the uniform of the US armed forces, and now some of those same pinheaded dweebs wish they were really one of us and now make up stories of being “life takers & heartbreakers”
    I just SMH at this sort of idiocy

  16. sbalm says:

    Nothing says legit SEAL like an oversized Pooh bear gently resting his hand on your shoulder.

    It is sort of like the painting of Jesus holding his hand on the sailor trying to navigate rough seas.

  17. AW1Ed says:

    Over at Military Phonies they say his stomping grounds are Georgia and, yes, Florida.

  18. Green Thumb says:

    Dude looks creepy.

    I wonder if he “touched ” Pooh Bear?

  19. lily says:

    He looks like he could probably be mentally deficient. His mom probably told he’s a Navy SEAL, tattooed him, got him a biker’s vest and bike and told him to ride the wind.

  20. OldManchu says:

    Step… away… from the little children!

  21. Skyjumper says:

    I am so pissed at all of these lying posers!

    Two of my buddies (both retired Army) and I went to a local Gun Show yesterday. I thought they had been giving away free Veteran’s hats because of all of the guys sporting them.

    There was one seller, probably late 50’s early 60’s, that had a military clothing booth. He was wearing a Desert Storm cap (probably should have been wearing a “Dessert Storm hat on judging by the size of him) and decked out with a Army t-shirt, combat boots and chocolate chip drawers. Loud and boisterous talking about his “experiences”.

    Now, maybe he was a real vet, but my B.S. detector was going off like crazy. I had to push myself to move on before I approached him and asked him some questions about his service.

    Between the three of us (2 Viet,1 Afgan combat vets with a total 79 years of combined Army service) we were wearing a grand total of ZERO military patches, pins on our clothes.

    These embellishing individuals just truly piss me off!

    • 1610desig says:

      I haven’t been to a gun show in over a decade mostly because of the loud fakery and the dumbasses who could tell you a little about the 2nd Amendment but nothing about the others…but it was those really weird fucks selling German/Nazi shit that appeared to me to be the top of the poser pantheon…perhaps that’s changed though

    • SaraSnipe says:

      I was getting some propane bottles filled at a feed store, when the guy in line behind me (Wearing a Semper Fi hat) told the youngster filling the bottles that he had just retired that day. I asked him if there were a position available, and he asked me if I ever operated heavy equipment. I mentioned that I drove a Cat 950 front-end loader, and the M320 rocket launcher and M109 howitzer if any of that counts. The youngster filling the tanks asks me if the 320 is MLRS, and I assured him it was, whereupon we shot the shit a little about where we had been. No big deal. Retired Marine Hat thanks us for our service, and tells us VietNam was his war where he did two tours and was a POW for 11 months at the Hanoi Hilton. Awkward… If he was for real, I feel like shit thinking he was full of shit,but then I just got the vibe he was blowing smoke up our ass about the Hanoi Hilton. I just said,”damn, no shit? Glad you made it back allright blah blah blah…”. My point is, Liars make one doubt the legit troops that suffered, and endured whenever they would share an experience such as that. My experience with the legit warriors is that I am usually surprised to find out that ol Bob in the HVAC shop was one of the Frozen Chosen, or Bill up in Bag Fab was UDT back in the fifties. My GrandDad was a POW in Russia, but he never bragged about it other than to talk about how much shit can be edible if one is hungry enough.

    • desert says:

      WHY ? I wear my Navy hats, have a great one with a carrier, leaving a wake on the bill? I am proud of my service, privileged to have served and will be damned if I let a bunch of chicken shyt wannabee goat phuckers keep me from flying my colors!!

  22. AW1Ed says:

    What’s the tat on top, the one with the compass rose? I get the Trident and Navy Eagle.

  23. Jeff LPH 3, 63-66 says:

    Y’all said everything, so no use wearing out the ink ribbon on this key board. Oh yes, I type out my checks, etc. with a smith corona typewriter and use a Paymaster 8500 series mechanical check writer. Still in the 1950’S.

  24. Mark Lauer says:

    He’s a former Team VI WALRUS.

  25. Mason says:

    I found this picture of him maintaining proficiency on waterborne caloric intake operations.

    Body like that needs regular upkeep. He’d waste away otherwise.

  26. Starbux says:

    Well, go big or go home I guess. I think this guy’s watched too many Tom Clancy movies.

    There he was cleaning the shitter’s at basic, when all of the sudden, “Attention on Deck!” It was the POTUS and the Navel Special Warfare commander on board. While scrubbing that shitter with fury, the POTUS hand picks him to be part of the elite SEAL’s. VFR direct to team 6. He was so good, no need for BUD/S. His missions and any acknowledgement of his association with such an elite team only resides in records stored deep in the bowels of a SAPF in a highly secured building at Groom Lake. He can’t tell you about the details of his secret missions unless at the bar and after pounding a couple natty lites. Then he will tell you all about his 200 confirmed kills. He will show you his tats and the scars where the screws and metal plates are in his head from being shot and blown up 30 times on missions the US will never acknowledge our presence.

    He can’t tell you the details, but he will tell you them anyway. After all, don’t all retired CIA agents look like fat trailer trash with the company tat on their arms?

  27. rgr769 says:

    All this walrus needs now is a doo-rag and a support dog.

  28. Slick Goodlin says:

    Pasquale? Pasquale Pieplate?

    Wasn’t he the drummer in the Chuck E. Cheese house band?

    But I guess that wasn’t good enough for him.

  29. jonp says:

    Let’s be clear: That’s not a motorcycle “club” he is riding with. It’s PGR and I am quite certain when they learn of this there will be a large number of not so happy people involved in telling him to go play in another sandbox

    • Ex-PH2 says:

      Oh. My. Alleycat!

      So he’s even faking the motorcycle club?????????????

      Seriously, dude, that is SO over the top, even Forgin’ Frank and that dweeb in the garage mancave can’t match it!!!

      This is a true Heavy Drop insult to ALL biker clubs!

    • AW1Ed says:

      I know several Patriot Guard Riders, and they will take a very dim view of Dennis Pasquale’s stolen valor escapades, and will doubtless inform his local PRG of this. I can only hope someone there has a camcorder to record the event for posterity.

      Did I mention Dennis Pasquale and stolen valor? The interweb is forever.

  30. A Proud Infidel®™ says:

    In that picture of him with Pooh, Dennis Pasquale has his mouth partially open like he’s either a Steer chewing his cud or he has Blower’s Cramp! Yeah, I compared him to a steer, they get good and FAT once they’re castrated and IMHO Dennis Pasquale has NO nuts.

    • Bim says:

      Agree, API.

      A big UDT/SEAL hat, a slack-mouthed fatass (who looks to be missing a chromosome or two) with a bad teenage ball duster, and the piece de resistance: The limp wristed, gentle caress of a lifesized Winnie the Pooh. That is the best phony SEAL photo ever.

      The person in that costume probably puked in his Poohsuit afterwards.

      Dennis Pasquale- You have outdone yourself and will forever go down (?!) as a laughingstock in the anals (I know how its spelled!) of phony SEAL history. I just wish I could see the look on the Shipley’s faces when they saw this pic for the first time.

  31. Dennis - not chevy says:

    I was hoping this one would show up to defend himself; but he didn’t. Therefore by default and the power vested in me by being over 55; and the inability to invent the time machine and go back and suing my sainted mother for giving me the same name as this thing. I do not allow this thing to go by the name Dennis; he may use Denny, Phony, or Wannabe. He may not use Dennis.

  32. Combat Historian says:

    I come home from church and have to look at this protoplasmic poser blob; I was supposed to go have supper right now, but may need to hold off until my stomach stops heaving and settles down…

    BTW, that’s not a SEAL, more like a sperm whale filled with the sperm of drunken hobos and winos…

  33. Deplorable B Woodman says:

    Lord Cthulhu! We’ve been awaiting your awakening and return.

  34. Deplorable B Woodman says:

    I’m surprised no one hasn’t already said this……….
    Pasquale looks like he ATE the SEAL.

    If he has any white creamy substance around his lips, he has a blown SEAL.

  35. Tony180A says:

    That motorcycle is taking a pounding!!

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