Jose Alvarez; phony Green Beret

| February 28, 2018 | 137 Comments

Our partners at Guardians of the Green Beret share their work on this fellow, Jose Igor Alvarez aka Igor Gretaldezky. He claims to be a special forces warrior, but his uniform says differently;

When the GB who sent him to us did a short recon on his FB profile, he saw a picture of him with a Combat Infantry Badge with a star, an Ranger and SF tab, Purple Heart and some comical SF crest on his black beret.

Wrong unit insig on shoulders, MP brass with Infantry blue disks, No Airborne Tab with SF unit patch (That’s part of the patch).

We reached out to ask him to remove his bogus pictures and were immediately blocked from further contact. The pictures remained.

In fact, the pictures are still there in spite of the egregious errors;

CIB w/ Star False

Special Forces Tab False

Ranger Tab False

Purple Heart False

Good Conduct Medal False

National Defense Service Medal False

Kosovo Campaign Medal False

Afghanistan Campaign Medal False

Global War on Terrorism Service Medal False

Humanitarian Service False

Armed Forces Reserve Medal False

NCO Professional Development Ribbon False

Army Service Ribbon Earned Earned

Kuwait Liberation Medal (Saudi Arabia) Service must have been performed in support of Operation Desert Storm and the liberation of Kuwait, between 17 January 1991 to 28 February 1991 False

Senior Wings False

Air Assault False

He had less than three years of service in the Texas National Guard, discharged as an E-2 Private petroleum specialist with only the Army Service Ribbon;

Category: Phony soldiers

Comments (137)

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  1. Dustoff says:

    I see he was awarded the highly coveted ” Army Service Ribbon” known to some insiders as the “road guard ribbon”. Yep, he was in the shit.

    • A Proud Infidel®™ says:

      Also known as the “Expert Floor Buffer Operator Ribbon”.

      • Some Guy says:

        AKA the gay pride ribbon for obvious reasons. They don’t hand that one out to just anyone, lemme tell ya! 🙂

        • rgr1480 says:

          And I never wore mine for obvious reasons! Hell … I figured the reason I was allowed to stay in the Army and wear a uniform ….was because I had Army service.

          Of course we all wanted to wear stacks of ribbons right out of basic training … but there’s nothing embarassing about having no ribbons as a “baby soldier.” Hell, even privates right out of basic are getting “participation” ribbons …


          Then, Army started giving out ribbons in the 1980s for completing NCO Professional Development Courses … That’s what I thought hard-stripes, rockers, diamonds, and stars were for. I’m surprised they’re not giving away ribbons for Officers completing OCS, OBC, OAC, CAS3, etc.


          Okay … I’m starting to sound like my father …. and I’ve grown quite fond of Frank Sinatra, Tony Bennet, etc.

          Sheesh … I’ve *BECOME* my father!!

        • E4 Mafia For Life. says:

          My daughter’s friend was over at the house looking at my shadow box in the Man Cave.
          She is a lesbian. Not the Rosie O’Donut, man hating type but loves guns and I take her to the range with my daughter.
          She sees the ASR and asks me what the ribbon was for.
          I said it was my gay award and the Army has a special program and requires people to be sodomized in Basic. AKA, Getting The Big Green Weenie.
          Since everyone knows I’m full of shit, I ended up telling her the truth… about qualifying expert on the Buffer making the tile shine rainbow bright.

    • thebesig says:

      Jose Alvarez, phony Green Beret, is an Army Service Ribbon Veteran! Yet, that wasn’t enough for him. The only “special forces” that I could see him a part of itthh thha sppettthal kind. 🙄

    • rgr1480 says:

      We called it “The Live & Breathe Ribbon” because we all got one at the tail end of USAF basic in 1973 … we had no idea what it was!

    • Club Manager, USA ret. says:

      According to his Facebook page, works at Texas Department of Public Safety. His ass is grass and we be the lawnmower. You just know they are going to be overjoyed to get the news about one of their stellar employees.

  2. Martinjmpr says:

    Betcha a dollar he’s also wearing an SF tab and/or Ranger tab on his right sleeve.

    For some reason the SF fakers always seem to do that.

    And as for that uniform: Hallelujah! We have another MSG Soup Sandwich!

  3. Geetwillickers says:

    Fuel Dude! Been drinking JP-8 directly from the fueler I see.

  4. IDC SARC says:

    GOTGB said he’s also apparently posing as a State Trooper.

    What a gnard gargling shitstained cumqueef.

  5. Ret_25X says:

    it is important not to sniff the fumes…that way you do not become “Master Bates”

  6. A Proud Infidel®™ says:

    Atomic Dingleberry.

  7. Sapper3307 says:

    But he looks VERY special.

  8. ChipNASA says:

    He’s probably got an inferiority complex that his parents named him Igor.

  9. SCPO USN Ret. says:

    That face says it all, “Lubricating Oil Specialist”

  10. 2banana says:

    CIB looks small. Like it is for the mess uniform.

    Greens went out years ago.

    No Green Beret wear shooting medals. They are assumed to be expert shots.

  11. Green Thumb says:

    I wonder if this turd like to pump fuel or be pumped with fuel?

    Three-year, E-2 = Turd.

  12. Ret_25X says:

    Is this guy the 1SG at All Points?

  13. Roh-Dog says:

    Blue disks and no cord?
    Does it chap anyone else’s ass that this ahole had the uniform put together, tailored then had the grapes to get professional photos taken?
    Jose Igor Alvarez aka Igor Gretaldezky enjoy the internet fame! Stay away from the kiddies!

  14. Graybeard says:

    Texas National Guard? Jose Alvarez, you done stepped on the honor of my Great State, vato.

    Makes me wonder if he is a wetback. He is certainly an embarrassment to all Tejanos everywhere.

  15. AW1Ed says:

    11B-Mailclerk says:

    Faking assholes, like this guy,
    The fat slobs, who always lie.
    Men who failed in every way,
    Try to steal the Green Beret.

    Unearned bling on pudgy chests,
    Doo-rag and dog, check out the vest!
    One hundred times, they’ll boast today
    “Believe me man, I’m a Green Beret!”

    Couldn’t let this gem slide down into obscurity. After all, it’s the “Ballad of the Green Beret Posers.”

  16. MCPO NYC USN Ret. says:

    Your guys are SO DUMB!

    What he meant to say was, “Buttroleum Supply Specialist”.

    That is all … carry out the POD!

  17. rgr769 says:

    I-gor here is apparently the character who received the aybee-normal brain transplant. Many of our SF posers know “triple tab” means three tabs. This ass-clown forgot the Airborne tab which is always part of the SF patch. No one who actually served in a SF unit has ever worn that patch (correctly) without the airborne tab.

  18. Frankie Cee says:

    As I love to do, I left some love for ol’ Jose Igor Alvarez Gretaldezky ” Jose Alvarez, we can be sure a person is a phony when we see their actual records, like at the link below. I know they are also a coward when they block me after giving them the link. You make phony claims to be some kind of famous. Asshole, we are helping you with your fame. Every time we mention your name in a comment at the link below, Gooogle grabs it so that anyone checking into you will see that you are a piece of shit, standing in the blood of better men than yourself, claiming the valor that they fought and died for. By the way, there are no MPs in the Special Forces, why are you wearing MP brass? Dead giveaway there poser. Fuel handler. Are you gonna be a pussy and block me now?” I dropped the link on a couple of his friends too.

  19. John Seabee says:


  20. Combat Historian says:

    MSG Soup Sandwich was in a class by himself…

    This souper-trouper needs his own moniker…


  21. Graybeard says:

    Jose Igor Alvarez Gretaldezky aka Master Sergeant Taco Soup is not a Green Beret.

    Jose Igor Alvarez Gretaldezky aka Master Sergeant Taco Soup never served in the active Army.

    Jose Igor Alvarez Gretaldezky aka Master Sergeant Taco Soup has besmirched (look it up, boy) the honor of the Texas National Guard – and I hope they decide to supply some remedial counseling.

    Jose Igor Alvarez Gretaldezky aka Master Sergeant Taco Soup is a looser.

    Jose Igor Alvarez Gretaldezky aka Master Sergeant Taco Soup should not, in sane people’s opinions, be around women, children, or animals.

    Jose Igor Alvarez Gretaldezky aka Master Sergeant Taco Soup is just creepy – and not in an Alfred Hitchcock way.

    Jose Igor Alvarez Gretaldezky aka Master Sergeant Taco Soup is a pathetic case of dumb.

    There is more to be said concerning Jose Igor Alvarez Gretaldezky aka Master Sergeant Taco Soup, however I shall leave room for others to do so if they wish.

    • A Proud Infidel®™ says:


      I copy:

      Jose Igor Alvarez Gretaldezky aka Master Sergeant Taco Soup is not a Green Beret.

      Jose Igor Alvarez Gretaldezky aka Master Sergeant Taco Soup never served in the active Army.

      Jose Igor Alvarez Gretaldezky aka Master Sergeant Taco Soup has besmirched (look it up, boy) the honor of the Texas National Guard – and I hope they decide to supply some remedial counseling.

      Jose Igor Alvarez Gretaldezky aka Master Sergeant Taco Soup is a looser.

      Jose Igor Alvarez Gretaldezky aka Master Sergeant Taco Soup should not, in sane people’s opinions, be around women, children, or animals.

      Jose Igor Alvarez Gretaldezky aka Master Sergeant Taco Soup is just creepy – and not in an Alfred Hitchcock way.

      Jose Igor Alvarez Gretaldezky aka Master Sergeant Taco Soup is a pathetic case of dumb.

      There is more to be said concerning Jose Igor Alvarez Gretaldezky aka Master Sergeant Taco Soup, however I shall leave room for others to do so if they wish.

      I read you five by five,


  22. Mason says:

    How does he not rate the NDSM or GWOT Service medal? Do those require command approval?

    • Claw says:

      Doesn’t rate either medal because:

      His time spent on Federal Active Duty was in a Only for Training Purposes Status (Basic and AIT). Then returned to Texas for duty in the NG.

      Never activated from National Guard service to Federal service in support of GWOT before discharge, therefore not eligible for either the NDSM or GWOTSM.

  23. Ex-PH2 says:

    Ummm… isn’t Gretaldezky Polish or something? And his other names are Hispanic?

    What is he? A chia pet? Oh, sorry! I forgot that you all did nearly all the honors on this person already. You left out some of those more simple terms I’ve come to admire in Green Thumb, to wit:


    • The Stranger says:

      Lot of half Polish, half Mexican folks up Chicago way. Just saying it’s possible. Also, there were a fair amount of Germans and Czechs who settled in Texas in the 1800s; as I recall, parts of Poland were under Prussian rule back then too. That other last name could legitimately be a family name. His Green Beret claims, not so much.

    • Graybeard says:

      Around the San Antonio area are a large number of descendants of Poles, Czechs, Germans, Wendish and other central- and East-European immigrants. As well as the expected Hispanic population.

      I had a brother-in-law, since deceased, who grew up speaking German in the home until his older sister came home from her first day of school upset because she didn’t understand English. He retained a good eastern-Germany western-Poland accent all his life. He was like 3rd or 4th generation as well.

      Back to the point – it is quite possible that Jose Alvarez has a female Pollock ancestor. The question is, would they claim him now?

      • rgr1480 says:

        Your brother-in-law’s case reminds me. Waaaay back in 1976 we had a new NCO come to Germany who was something like a 6th genereation German from Pennsylvania. His family had migrated in the mid-1800s and maintained a dialect that was very close to the local Rheinland-Pfälzer dialect — theirs might even have been the same dialect, but frozen in time.

        • SaraSnipe says:

          Dialects in Germany vary from town to town. My maternal family is from Idar, and they make fun of people that speak Obersteiner. Idar-Oberstein is on town (sort of). My Dad is from Bayern, he got made fun of for the way he talked also.

          • Graybeard says:

            Dad was a rural Mississippi boy raised in Texas, didn’t start learning German until he was in the Army getting ready to go to Europe. Our German ancestors came over in 1778-ish, so the family had lost that before the War of Northern Aggression.

            One of his buddies was always after him about his Southern accent when speaking German: “Never with that accent. Never with that accent.”

            Then they ended up in the Bavarian region together, needed to ask a local about something, and the Yankee said “Let me speak, your accent is too bad.” The lady could not understand the Yankee, so Dad spoke up and asked the question. Her response was “Well, why didn’t he say so?”

            Dad ended up speaking German and Bernish fairly well.

            FWIW, the folks in Fredericksburg, TX, kept their German language and accent pretty well intact until this latest generation.

  24. A Proud Infidel®™ says:

    The next initiate into the Dutch Rudder Gang? He looks like someone set his face on fire and beat it out with an Ugly Club®™️ and a pair of golf cleats.

  25. Carlton G. Long says:

    As a former 77F (I know that the MOS numbers have changed but that was the Petroleum Supply Specialist MOS when I was in 89-92) … I can’t say I’m surprised. I had no idea what stolen valor was back then, but I do recall several of my quartermaster school classmates bragging that they had either “almost joined” the Marine Corps or “were in line for the next Special Forces class.”

  26. Wilted Willy says:

    What a total assclown, I hope this shit burrito stays away from children! Why can’t any of these phony ponies just tell the truth? At least if you served, be proud of what you did, all jobs are important. Don’t shit all over a good record asshole! You are a punta and a pendaho!
    Now eat shit and die!

    • ChipNASA says:

      I have shit on the Mountain of Insults®™ 26 times but no burrito.
      I really want to add it but I want to punch it up a little.

      Bulbous Bleeding Batrachivorous Butthole Burrito

      Yeah, I like it

  27. Atkron says:

    Jose…you suck.

  28. Jeff LPH 3, 63-66 says:

    I thank the Lord that I removed the Un-Authorized Expert Infantry Badge from my brand new custom embroidered Army National Guard (NY) cap the other day so I don’t get blasted from the TAH Vets. Whew, that was a close call.

  29. Sparks says:

    Everything he claims…Phony.

    Full time cocksucker…Check.

  30. Frankie Cee says:

    Well shit. Did he block me or close his page? I just tried to go there but couldn’t make the trip.

  31. Frankie Cee says:

    Jose Igor Alvarez aka Igor Gretaldezky, you panty wetting coward. You think that blocking me will make it easier on you? Now that you have done that, watch how many of the comments following mine will use your full name, lighting you up at Goooooogle, like Las Vegas Neon. Ranger School Class 1-82? No way in hell. Special Forces Long Tab and Ranger Tab with no Airborne tab? No Phucking way, Cabron!

      • rgr769 says:

        I love the pic that this ass-wipe wasn’t in. Our class motto was “icicle rangers.” But the cadre started calling us the “Christmas Rangers,” because we were the first class that was allowed a 7 day X-mas leave.

        • rgr1480 says:

          I was looking for your class photo, but see that year-group 1969 has *only* one class photo on-line: 12-69.

          Gee … I was a sophmore HS student in Bangkok in 1969!

          • A Proud Infidel®™ says:

            I was a rug rat back then!

          • rgr769 says:

            Yeah. They don’t have our class picture on the website. Our pic was taken in Floriduh at Eglin Camp #7 right after the graduation formation, IIRC. One of the NCO’s in our G Co./75th association that was in my class has a copy. Unfortunately, I don’t have one, or I’d post it.

          • rgr769 says:

            You must have experienced some “lub you long time” if you were in HS in Bangkok, when the rest of us were just trying to get to 1st or 2nd base.

            • rgr1480 says:

              My school was the International School of Bangkok.

              My girlfriend was Japanese. I didn’t need to resort to “lub you long time girls” (woo hoooooooo)!

              Loved her for years — she became an inflight translator for Cathay Pacific Airlines and met up with me in Germany in the mid-70s; SF & Tokyo in the mid-80s … then I got married in the late ’80s and had to erase her from my hard drive.

              I’ve watched “Forensic Files” … Regular Joes can *never* totally erase their hard drives.

              (Well, we can at the agency where I work — DoD 5220.22-M data sanitization method — but I’m not talking about that sort of hard drive.)

              “Thanks for the mammaries ….”

              • rgr769 says:

                My “tour guide” in Taipei when I went on my first R&R in 1971 was half Chinese and half Japanese. Those were mamaries I will keep in my hard drive forever. She did lub me long time for the whole week.

  32. Frankie Cee says:

    Jose Igor Alvarez aka Igor Gretaldezky, I am making a call to the Texas DPS CID in Austin, in the morning to ask of what your position is with them since you claim to be associated with them.

  33. A Proud Infidel®™ says:

    He sure likes posting pictures of Texas State Trooper cruisers on his Farcebook page, he should have stayed a handjob cumstain in a rent-by-the-hour flophouse motel.

  34. Island of Misfit Toys says:

    Petroleum supply specialist aka my GT score was not even high enough to be an 88M.


      Those fumes must have killed all his remaining brain cells.
      I remember that everyone who worked with OTTO fuel on a daily basis seemed ‘ a bit off’

    • Carlton G. Long says:

      The good old 77F vs 88M tensions. My old platoon (“Trans” Platoon … HHT 1-3 ACR) had two squads … POL (77F) and Cargo (88M) … since our platoon sergeant was an 88M, it meant that any time POL fell behind on its work, the word was, “POL is ****ing up” but whenever Cargo fell behind, the word was, “POL, step in there and help; we’re all one platoon, you know…”

  35. Frankie Cee says:

    Y’all, Jose Igor Alvarez aka Igor Gretaldezky needs his name mentioned. He is seeking fame, and using a pronoun in the comments just doesn’t cut it. Shape up and give him the recognition that his little ego desires. Use his full name so he will be etched in the altar of St. Goooooogle in proper fashion. Y’all are slackers.


    ‘E-bay wings,upon his chest,
    Trying to look, like America’s Best,
    One hundred men, he’ll blow today
    B’cause Jose is, a Green Bidet’

  37. Skippy says:

    Fracking TURD Burgler


    Thankya Very Much!

    It is s a work in progress. Keep them ideas coming!

  39. Tony180A says:

    This fucking dick sniffer!! Since you’re wearing a metal replica 5th SFG(A) flash and SF unit crest on your beret and shoulders I’d like to invite you to the 5th Special Forces Group reunion this Sept. I also took the liberty of forwarding this info to a buddy of mine who is a Texas State Trooper but used to be the 2/5th SFG(A) BN CSM. Internet is forever motherfucker!

  40. Paul says:

    Whoa. I get from earlier comments that he doesn’t even have a NDSM or GWOT because he never went on federal active duty, but how the hell did he not manage to go on ADSW/ADOS at all in 3ish years of service?!?! It takes work to not ever go on active duty other than for training any time from 2001 – 2012. Even the Coast Guard reservists who went on ADOS for the Deepwater Horizon oil spill got the NDSM!

  41. Combat Historian says:

    Let me be the first to mention Jose Igor Alvarez aka Igor Gretaldezky as the new day dawns…

  42. GI JANE says:

    Can’t find his page. He probably deleted it.

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