Sidney Bouvier Gilstrap-Portley returns to high school to relive glory days

| May 17, 2018 | 16 Comments

The UK’s Daily Mail recounts the story of 25-year-old Sidney Bouvier Gilstrap-Portley who missed his high school glory days of basketball so much that he enrolled in a high school pretending to be 17-year-old Rashun Richardson, claiming to be a Hurricane Harvey refugee – he even dated a fourteen-year-old;

Gilstrap-Portley graduated from his own high school, North Mesquite, in 2011, and had a relatively successful college basketball career as a guardsmen for the Dallas Christian College between 2013 and 2014. But he went undrafted in the 2017 NBA draft.

[…]

Gilstrap-Portley was finally caught after one of his former coaches from North Mesquite High School recognized him when they saw him playing at a tournament in April, and alerted the Hillcrest basketball coach.

They should have suspected him when he started using My Space instead of Facebook.

The Dallas News says that he’s facing a charge of tampering with government records.

Category: Dumbass Bullshit

Comments (16)

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  1. RCAF-CHAIRBORNE says:

    Methinks he went back for High School poon-tang only. I wonder if any charges are upcoming for that 14yo GF?

    Who the fuck still uses MySpace?… other than those who have been held in sex dungeons since 2006

  2. 2banana says:

    And yet illegals are celebrated.

    He should declare himself to be a trans 17 year old.

    And a trans woman and go out for the female team.

    He would be drafted by the WNBA for sure.

  3. Green Thumb says:

    WTF?!?

    Pedophile motherfucker.

    This whacko would make Bruce Springsteen proud….Glory Days!

  4. The Other Whitey says:

    According to Daily Wire, this fucking creep has a kid. Wrong on every possible level.

  5. 2/17 Air Cav says:

    If I went back to high school, it would be to slap the shit out of a couple of teachers. Of course, they’re either dead or droolers by now–which would make the job easier.

  6. A Proud Infidel®™ says:

    That is SO fucked up in so many ways.

  7. Daisy Cutter says:

    At least he got to be BMOC for a while.

    BMOC = Big Man on Campus

    • Claw says:

      He may have been a BMOC for a while, but he definitely went FRPR*, so the Whiz Wheel®™ says:

      Sidney Bouvier Gilstrap-Portley AKA Rashun Richardson 82 x 8 = 656.

      *Full Retard Past Rutabaga (Hat Tip to API)

  8. Mason says:

    This guy has got to have some mental deficiencies. Unless he was recruited by the local PD to 21 Jump Street into the school to take down a drug ring.

  9. Ex-PH2 says:

    Some people simply don’t want to grow up… ever.

  10. rgr769 says:

    Who wants to go back and do effing high school over again? This dumb bastard needs to have his head examined. Why didn’t he just go back to college and become a perpetual student like many millenials. I am suspecting he wanted some 14 year old trim, as well as being a hero on the basketball court.

  11. GDContractor says:

    The Hillcrest High School in Dallas Texas that is mentioned is the high school that I graduated from.

  12. Jarhead says:

    A click on the Dallas News link shows him as being charged with Tampering with Government records. Shouldn’t that read Tampering with underage hotbloods?
    Also shows him while playing for Dallas Christian College as being voted Offensive Player of the Year. IMHO he should be voted as Offensive Student of the Year where he has been attending high school. Can’t believe two things about this story. First, a mother only talking by phone to what she assumed was a 17 year old about dating her 14 year old daughter, and believing his B. S. Secondly, that who ever allowed this child molesting reprobate to enter school could not see this moron is waaaaay over the limit for the kiddies he tried to identify with.
    Surely someone had noticed his interest in reruns of the Aunt Jemima show. When he wanted to see Little Richard at a sock hop dance, didn’t anybody think that was a bit strange? By the way, wasn’t his nickname of Sanford something of a clue? On the basketball floor he wanted to be known as “Wilt the Stilt”. Any one of us could have figured that one out. Finally, as if that wasn’t enough clues, I don’t guess people caught on when he was giving “Twist” lessons at the sock hop. The little 14 year old was bound to have said, “My my, he shore do love them Commodores!”

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