James “Kimo” Akaka; phony SEAL

| September 19, 2014

James Kimo Akaka

Editor Note: We pulled this soon after we published it on June 30, 2014 because some hot Asian journalist chick at KITV in Honolulu asked me to pull it, but, she never pulled the trigger on the stolen valor story she was supposed to be writing about this clown. So, Don Shipley called today and said we needed to revive our campaign on “Kimo”. Here’s Don’s new video on him with a bonus confrontation with Arthur Neil Obus;

Don Shipley sends us his research on James “Kimo” Akaka who served three years in the Navy and left the service as an E-2 “Navy striker” and underachiever. A few years ago, he had a stroke and lost use of everything except his right arm. It was soon after that, he began calling himself a former Navy SEAL;

Yesterday the Ho’olaule’a ‘ohana gathered as Navy Seal veteran and extraordinary human being, Kimo Akaka crossed the SUP Maliko downwind run finish line after paddling with help from family and friends, for 4+ strenuous hours. A race that takes most an hour and a half on average, Kimo’s method of paddling is much different than most. A Navy Seal veteran for 17 years, Kimo suffered a stroke in 2011 that rendered him paraplegic, unable to feel or use any extremity other than his right arm. By strapping himself to the board and using his right arm to paddle and feet to steer, Kimo is able to navigate the water and ocean for which he loves most.

Kimo began his honorable work with the Navy Seals in 1981 as a member of Unit 2 which sent him to the East Coast and San Diego. A native of Oahu, Kimo joined OluKai’s 6th Annual Ho’olaule’a with a dream of finishing the legendary Maliko downwind run, no matter what it took to do so. Encouraged by the humble mentorship of legendary waterman Archie Kalepa, a friend and Kimo’s source of inspiration, joined him on the water half way through his journey to the finish line. Archie was boated in to support and swim the remaining 4 miles of the race with the exhausted and wavering Kimo. Offering words of reassurance, Archie was called in to keep him centered and on track to the end of the race.

As recently as a few days ago, Don caught him posting his SEAL BS on his Facebook page and when Don posted to his claims, Kimo took that shit down immediately.

Yeah, yeah, I know, maybe he’s diminished mentally, and all of that. But it still doesn’t justify telling completely fabricated stories about being in Team One and Team Two, and his reaction to Don Shipley’s comment on his Facebook page tells me that he’s not as diminished as you’d like to think about him.

There are enough real SEALs out there who deserve the accolades and freebies that Kimo is getting who are the real deal – Kimo doesn’t need to be ripping stuff out of their hands and getting accolades that he doesn’t deserve.

James Kimo Akaka Cheerleaders

Category: Phony soldiers

Comments (74)

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  1. ExHack says:

    May I please be the first to say, in the words of Shipley himself …

    Butt Weasel.

  2. Delilah T. says:

    I second that, ExHack, but I prefer crapweasel.

    • HMCS(FMF) ret. says:

      A big, steaming, lying pile of Akaka, in my opinion…

      • Hondo says:

        Yeah, in this case his surname is uniquely apropos for his conduct: “A-kaka.”

        The only way I can cut this guy any slack whatsoever is if he has verified stroke-induced severe memory disruption or dementia. Otherwise, no dice.

        Little children know the difference between telling the truth and lying. So do the vast majority of stroke victims.

    • A Proud Infidel®™ says:

      SNOTWEASEL does fine for me!!

    • 19D1OR4 - Smitty says:

      I use dickweasel pretty often.

    • Stacy0311 says:

      please stop disparaging weasels everywhere….

  3. rb325th says:

    Unless he is the only person in his family left alive, someone in his family knew he was full of shit about being a Navy SEAL for 17 years,if he only did 3 years in the Navy.
    My family may not have known everything I did when I was in, but they knew when I got out. Math must be one of those really hard to grasp things in his family perhaps. I could get it if he lied and told him he was a SEAL for 3 years, but 17 and not one said “wait a fucking minute, I remember he was working that shit job as a peep show booth cleaner for the 4 years when he was supposedly in the SEALs…”

    This guy could be inspirational on his stroke recovery alone, but no…he had to go make up his career as a SEAL to get more prestige I guess.

    • AW1 Tim says:

      Word, bro. Word.

    • stuart povick says:

      Kathy and I read the obits every morning ( cheerful way to get the day going ) we wonder at the bullshit in the obits …. you know the usual …. served as a Green Beret on board the USS New Jersey and help capture Bin Laden ….. don’t the families even question such outrageous bullshit ….. that isn’t even historically or chronologically correct ?

    • The Other Whitey says:

      Evidently shitbaggery and stupidity are inherited traits. I’m sorry for his condition, but he’s still a lying asshole and they’re lying assholes for supporting a claim they have to know is bullshit.

    • ArmyATC says:

      His wife would almost certainly be involved in his shitbaggery. She, among anyone else, should know that he wasn’t a SEAL.

    • O-4E says:

      He’s Hawaiian dude. Having been stationed there 4 1/2 years I’d put the education level of the average Ugandan over the average Hawaiian.

      • NHSparky says:

        Same here. Someone told me a few weeks ago how wonderful it would be to live in Hawaii.

        They got about a ten-minute discussion from me, after I cleaned up the coffee I blew out my nose.

        • Eric Dickinson says:

          oh now wait a minute please, I’m from Hawaii and can asure you that not everyone from there is a dumb shit or liar. I am a retired Navy Chief (and the son of a Chief) but in no way shape or form condone the actions or stories told by this clown.

      • mcorin lima says:

        Please don’t get racial about it. POS’s are in every group. I am Hawaiian as well as my father Both of us served with honor.

  4. Veritas Omnia Vincit says:

    Once again, someone could have told the truth and been the person all of us could support.

    3 years of honorable service and the misfortune to suffer a stroke that left him crippled and coming back to swim in challenge races is a great story.

    The embellishing only works until he is discovered to be a liar and then he is that pathetic, lying cripple instead of the honorable, inspiring paraplegic he could have been….why rock the lies?

    The truth was good, and the truth would have been more than enough to get a community behind him. And if he had told the truth, anybody talking shit about him would have a world of people looking to put that right, now most folks will talk about how anything else bad happens is probably Karma getting itself squared away with him.

    • Jumper says:

      That’s the exact point I’ll never understand… his story was already fairly noteworthy without the SEAL poser BS.

  5. royh says:

    If you’re unable to feel or use any extremity other than your right arm, how do you steer with your feet?

  6. AverageNCO says:

    Maybe phony Hawaiian SEAL Nikko can teach phony SEAL Kimo to ride dolphins.

  7. CC Senor says:

    What the hell is a Navy striker? Is that like a mechanic’s helper in the draft era Army, whose career progression topped out at PFC?

    • charles w says:

      He did not have a rate. MOS to you Army types. Instead of going to a certain school, he had to do some on the job training.

      • CC Senor says:

        Got it, thanks. Exactly like a mechanic’s helper.

      • Enigma4you says:

        It means he went to the fleet un-designated.

        That used to happen allot, now not so much.

        He decided or was told when he got to the fleet that he would learn a rate or MOS people that have declared that they want to be a certain rate and have been accepted to be trained in that rate are then strikers, and remain so until they are either sent to school for that rate or they pass test for E-4 (Petty Officer 3rd class)

        If they pass the advancement test but are not promoted (PNA passed not advanced) they can wear the rating symbol as an E-3

    • MustangCryppie says:

      When a “non-rate” (Seaman, Fireman, Airman) chose a specialty and either went to “A” school or did OJT, we said the Sailor was “striking” for that job (or rating we would say). Don’t know if that’s the book definition, but that’s how we used it.

      When I was going to Russian language school as a Seaman, I was striking for CTI.

      • Just An Old Dog says:

        The Marine Corps ( at least part of my time) would use the term “non-rates” for E-3 (LCpl) and below.
        I guess it was a carry over from Naval Terminology.
        From what I understood, back in the day all new sailors were basically “firemen” with a bit of working knowledge of the navy ( rank structure, knots, uniform wear, customs and courtesy etc) when they left boot camp.
        When they arrived on a ship they would be loosely attached to a division depending on the needs, and sometimes moved around. Once they had been aboard for a while and showed a talent and interest in a specific job they would “strike” for a rating.
        Now sailors are pretty much assigned to a school right after recruit training. Im pretty sure their rank doesnt include their rating up until E-4 (petty Officer 3rd class).
        The swab-jockeys on here could tell you better

  8. Green Thumb says:


  9. BOILING MAD CPO says:

    A USN striker is a sailor that has graduated from ‘A’ school (basic job training) or has taken the E4 exam but was not promoted due to no vacancies in that rate. By his being an E2 striker indicates he sucessfully completed his school.

    • ArmyATC says:

      And getting out a E-2, after three years, would appear to say he wasn’t very high speed.

      • royh says:

        I don’t think there’s even an exam requirement for advancement to E-3. I went in under an accelerated advancement program so I could be wrong about that.

        • MCPO NYC USN Ret. says:

          E-1 to E-3 in Navy is time in grade. E-3 to E-7 is test. E-7 through E-9 requires a being selection by a board of Master Chiefs.

          I sat as a voting member on 4 selection boards

          And no, Bernath is not, never was nor will he ever be a Genuine or Honorary CPO. PERIOD.

      • MCPO NYC USN Ret. says:

        Not true.

        I believe he was a high speed Sailor in addition to being half retarded.

        In review:

        High speed + half retarded = half retarded.

  10. ArmyATC says:

    Serious question here. How do the frauds do it? I’ve seen story after story of the liars and phonies getting all sorts of benefits. I can’t even get help building a ramp for my front door. I don’t get it.

    • streetsweeper says:

      ArmyATC, are you local to Atlanta? If so, Jonn has my contact info Or he get yours to me.

      • ArmyATC says:

        No, I’m in Indiana. Thanks though, I appreciate the offer. My post wasn’t to ask for help, it was more wonderment how those shitbags got all the bennies that they do. Hunting trips, gifts, and even homes. It boggles the mind.

        • MCPO NYC USN Ret. says:

          It starts at the VA:

          Walk in to any local VA benefits office with a Navy hat, USMC tee shirt, Army boots and Air Force wings pinned to the hat.

          Hand them a forged DD-214 and tell them about the Nam, Campboydeeah, Bayroot, Pananama, Quwait, Koreeah …

          Charlie’s terrible and relentless attacks after parashooting into Afganerstan in Aug of 1999.

          Catching the PDTS after visiting PI while deployed on DGG as a DA3 after SPEC FOR from LZ and subsequently being accidently sprayed by AO during Blacks Ops.

          On February 31, 1987 records were sealed by the Pentergone as ordered by President Johnson.

          VA rep will stamp it APPROVED, they give you a purdy identification and that is the beginning of the process.

    • Hondo says:

      ArmyATC: I presume you’ve seen this – and talked to one of the VSOs about getting their help in applying (presuming you qualify)? If not, it might be worth your time to look into this.


    • Andy11M (formely just Andy) says:

      Simple, they tell a big lie and they stick to it. And if they get called on it they lie, deny, and make counter accusations. And most of them have no problem telling these lies with a straight face. It has been pointed out more than once here, faking is usually just the tip of the iceberg. The fact that this guy got out as a E-2 after 3 years speaks volumes about how his career in the Navy went.

  11. Hayabusa says:

    In your defense, Jonn, I am basically powerless in the face of hot Asian chicks, and do pretty much anything they ask of me, as if controlled by the Force. Hell, I even married one…

    • Hack Stone says:

      I use the phrase “Hot Asian Chick” quite often, but to save time, I’ll just write HAC. I did marry a HAC, but after 27 years, she is best described as a “Slightly Above Room Temperature Asian Chick”. And if any of you guys are looking to follow my lead, my best advice is to marry an orphan, then you would be receiving those 3:00 AM phone calls to send money to the Province because her uncle has an ingrown toenail.

  12. MCPO NYC USN Ret. says:

    You had me a “hot asian chick”.

  13. MustangCryppie says:

    I wonder if the “braddah” is related to the former Senator Akaka. Might explain why hot KITV Wahine wanted Jonn to back off the story.

    Then again, this is Hawaii we’re talking about. Doesn’t have to be much rhyme or reason.

  14. Thunderbird says:

    “Ohh but he’s disabled.. leave him alone..”

    -fucknut apologists lining up to defend this crippled liar.

    There’s never a shortage of phony supporters that will defend and apologize for these pieces of shit. I don’t care that he’s disabled and had a stroke. He’s a liar.

    • ArmyATC says:

      The pathetic thing is, people who would normally be pissed at posers will turn around and defend them when you plop the liar in a wheelchair. It sickens me. They treat the liar as if he’s some poor little thing that has to be protected from those bullies. And the turd laps it up, playing his role to the hilt. Fucking dirtbags.

  15. crewchief guy says:

    doesnt anyone want to talk about that picture of don from the 80’s. the one where they’re talking about their first daughter.

    that picture is the real story here!!!

  16. W2 says:

    Mrs Shipley’s story about her dad and the quiet dignity of her father after the war is the reason stolen valor is such a big deal. While I can have some empathy for this Akika guy and his stroke, what he has stolen from others is reprehensible. What a shitbird.

  17. Green Thumb says:

    It would appear that APL is opening a Honolulu branch.

  18. Messkit says:

    In case Mrs. Hair reads these comments:

    God Bless you Ma’am. You came from good stock. Hooah and a lingering salute for your Father.

    ……how the hell did Don ever get so lucky?

  19. Cacti35 says:

    Geez, Don’s wife had this old fart in tears with the story about their little girl. Glad that turned out O.K.

  20. Grim REEPER says:

    Ahhhhh cut the guy some slack for Christ sake, he had a stroke and his memory is gone, heck I have even claimed to be a seal just to get some hot puss every now and then. No big deal, life goes on man, ain’t nothing but a thing..

    • Just An Old Dog says:

      This isn’t a piece of worn out nookie that looks like a beat up catcher’s mitt we are talking about. This guy has recieved thousands of dollars worth of athletic equipment, trips etc for his Phony SEAL story

  21. MCPO NYC USN Ret. says:

    Any updates on the “hot asian chick”?

  22. Dave Hardin says:

    I usually make some comment about Don’s….well not this time. Humbled and reverent this time. I watched my daughter fight lymphatic cancer. I cried too, many times.

    The endless parade of these gullible fucks that buy into this shit amaze me. So this bimbo and her supervisors lacked the stomach to expose this fake, that leaves us to make it so. We are just a bunch of heartless self-appointed out of control valor vigilantes to those that lack the intestinal fortitude required to do something about it.

    Trolls, critics, and the gutless have no alternative proposal as a solution. Only quips and the usual vitriolic nonsense. For once I would like to hear a remotely viable suggestion from one of these highly enlightened mental giants.

  23. Just An Old Dog says:

    My only take on this is that it’s possible that his family is the ones that have took the bullshit and ran with it.
    Just like some families try to run the bullshit obit after someone dies.
    Not saying he wasnt pulling the crap before he got sick, but generally once someone is that disabled that have someone advocate for them.
    It’s a screwed up situation overall. The guy has a lot of moxy for fighting to get his life back on track. That in itself is commendable. He probably could have gotten a lot of help based on his service anyway. If he or his family knowingly are playing people based on a phony SEAL claim, its fucked up.
    I don’t expect the media to do a damn thing about it. Too many people just dont get the idea that being a phony crosses all lines. Chances are the family will just say it wasa mistake and hes not even able to talk, so it would just be a pity party.

    • OWB says:

      Had the same thoughts, Dog. It’s just not likely that he perpetuated this lie without assistance.

      What he accomplished following the stroke appears quite worthy of praise. Too bad that can’t be the focus. It would have been nice to hear something along the lines of: “My family taught me to never give up, work hard, yada, yada. That determination was reinforced by the US Navy. Blah, blah, blah.”

      Now, the best we can hope for is a statement by a family member or friend claiming to have formulated the lie and he went along with it. After, how likely is a stroke victim to argue with a lie concocted by the folks who are literally wiping your butt while you can’t?

      Who knows. All we really have is the fact that he was never a SEAL.

    • ArmyATC says:

      “I have made mistakes in my life of which claiming to be something I wasn’t was a

      big one and have appoligised and asked forgivness from my family and friends. but I have never hurt anyone… so pull the logs out your own eye before hunting for spects in mine.

      I under stand that I will loose some friends, or those who I thought were friends over this, but before you judge me for my stupidity, look in the mirror and and think about the ghosts in your closet. And ANYTHING you have done your not proud of. I have made amends to the ones that I care about. And now choose to move foreward with my life….”

      This turd’s a fucking moron. Not only is his spelling and grammar atrocious, but he’s trying to sugar coat his lies and fraud with the pathetic excuse that “everybody does it.” Why would any rational person with an ounce of common sense take any classes with that worthless, immature POS.

      • Hack Stone says:

        Is that an apology? It is difficult to discern if it is, since he doesn’t indicate what he did wrong. It reminds me of a few years back when I was watching the news on NBC affiliate, and they cued up the “breaking news” music. News anchor Joe Krebs then says ” We have breaking news. We don’t know what is yet, but as soon as we do, we will update you.” I did not stick around to eventually find out what it was, but I can speculate that they were reporting that a “lawyer” who is not an honorary Chief Petty Officer crashed his aircraft.

      • GDcontractor says:

        Be sure and sign the guestbook!

  24. Steve says:

    I certainly hope this asshole has been found out and is not receiving anything from anyone. If he can fabricate these lies on his own, he can survive on his own.