Robert Goins; phony Marine

| December 16, 2015

Robert Goins (8)

The folks at Military Phony send us their latest, another West Virginian, and another phony Marine, Robert “Rob” Goins with a phony tattoo and a phony uniform;

Robert Goins (9)

Robert Goins (7)

But the bottom line is that the National Personnel Records Center asks “Who?”;

Robert Goins FOIA

Category: Phony soldiers

Comments (39)

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  1. ChipNASA says:

    More like Rob Groins.
    And Works Balls.
    Bonus Taint Tickler.

    • HMCS (FMF) ret. says:

      Must have done some time in the hole… has a “prison poosay” on his face. Loves him some cockmeat sammiches (with extra Manmayo) and tube steak.

      • Green Thumb says:

        I hear you.

        This turd looks like he knows his away round the hole…two-holes, that is.


        Also, it looks like he lost his tan.

  2. John "Faker 6" Giduck says:

    Tattoos are clearly indicators of real military service.

    I have my own tattoo that shows my fake service in the 82nd Airborne Division. It’s even in a book

    I also like “groins”.


    John “Faker 6” Giduck

  3. Dave Hardin says:

    Shit stain. Yep, another RECON guy. I guess the Marine Corps has contracted out all their maintenance, supply, admin, and non super killer jobs to refugees.

  4. GDContractor says:

    I like the “echo 2ndblnt 5mardiv 0321 mgsgt garica”

    Um. No. No. No. and No. Sister must have spelled USMC on his tattoo for him. What a maroon.

    • Just An Old Dog says:

      I’m sure the Marine Corps would be surprised to find a Master Sgt hanging around in a line Company as well as a Gunnery Sgt who never changed his MOS designator from 0321.

  5. HMCS (FMF) ret. says:

    Another player of the “Call of Booty – Anal Buttsekks Warrior” (Rump Ridin’ Recon add-on package).

    I’ve seen the pic of the young CPL before… can’t remember where. Looks nothing like BootyBoy Bob…

  6. Jarhead says:

    That photo shopped picture is a jinuwine Marine no doubt. However, the face does not resemble the other picture at the top of the page. By any chance was this dude black at one time? Look at the picture and see what I mean. Yep, if you can’t dazzle them with simple b. s., then show ’em the tat. That’ll do it for sure! He could have saved himself a ton of money on that tatoo by having it put on his flacid Johnson. Minus an erection, all scrunched up, it could have been used to tease women on the Internet by posting it with only U and C being shown. Knowing any gullible female just having to know what the rest of the tat said when the flag pole stood up.

  7. Skippy says:

    Next !!!!

  8. Dapandico says:

    He got the (p) STD from all those abandoned swimming pool sized satellite dishes found outside the single wides on the hill sides of WV.

    • Bernie Hackett, Jr. says:

      Now there’s a unique explaination. Sounds like class action stuff to me! Maybe the PTSD? Ate up with it,n’est pas?

  9. A Proud Infidel®™ says:

    ANOTHER pus-nutted candyassed no-load of a glittery gargoyle gonad-ogling taint-sniffing first string skin flute aficionado trying to pretend he’s hot shit! Where does he strut his stuff, the back part of truck stops and highway rest areas when he’s trolling for cock up his cornhole? I wonder what other con games this wino-blowing bedwetting thumbsucker is playing?

    • John "Faker 6" Giduck says:

      Whoa, there…

      He’d best not be trying to hormn in on my truckstop as I am the only pus-nutted candyassed no-load of a glittery gargoyle gonad-ogling taint-sniffing first string skin flute aficionado allowed to be heads down in that mens’ room.

      Jus’ sayin’


      John “Faker 6” Giduck

      • A Proud Infidel®™ says:

        So YOU’RE SAYING that you’re the King Shit bull goose loony wino-blower at your local truck stop and he’d better not try to move in on your turf?

    • Steve says:

      Ha! 🙂 dude, your rants are funny as balls

    • Bernie Hackett, Jr. says:

      Proud, you sure have a way with words.
      Us shanty Irish would say you’ve got the “gift of the gab!”
      I couldn’t do that if I was sober!

    • A Proud Infidel®™ says:

      If you think I’m something you ought to meet an old CPO I used to drink beer with every now and then, you could put the both of us next to a brand new tugboat tied up at a dock and he’d cuss that thing in two before I could even scratch the paint on the bow!

      As for your compliments:

  10. Old 1SG, US Army (Retired) says:

    ‘stache and goatee – check
    earrings – check
    lard arse skanky spouse – check
    USMC tatoo – check
    Facebook page with E7 gunny stripes and misc military logos – check

    This guy is real deal! West Virginia Rump Riders Militia…

  11. Thunderstixx says:

    That REAL Marine looks more like Samuel L Jackson in the Matrix to me.

  12. John D says:

    Just got a 60 grit for my belt sander, it’ll go in a large Priority Mail box.

    Wouldn’t even have to send it back…..

    • A Proud Infidel®™ says:

      I was thinking something like an angle grinder with a steel brush or some cotton gauze and either Drano or battery acid, a lit road flare would work nicely as well…

    • The Commentor' Formerly Known as MCPO NYC USN Ret. says:

      We poor Irish don’t have much, but we know how to improvise with very little:

      Potato Peeler …

  13. Climb to Glory says:

    Who’s the drunk that did that shitty tattoo? Frank Visconi would be proud. Shitbag.

  14. The Commentor' Formerly Known as MCPO NYC USN Ret. says:

    A wee bit of Christmas cheer …

    I have rearranged some letters in his name, and he will now and forever be referred to as:

    Obert Groins!

  15. SgtCapt says:

    Maybe he can head over to Parris Island and sell that tat on Craigslist… Or change it to a “Hello Kitty”?

  16. Instinct says:

    That is one of the shittiest tattoos I have ever seen. Bet he spent a whole $20 bucks getting it done.


  17. My, My, My says:

    Dude thinks he is clever by locking down his Facebook friends. I guess he didn’t realize that everyone that has liked or commented on his bullshit at his Facebook page can also receive messages linking them to places like this. Bwhaahahahaaa.

  18. sj says:

    Is West Virginia the new Florida for posers?

  19. Just An Old Dog says:

    Looks like he got the dress blue picture from this page.

    • Claw says:

      Yep, that’s where he got it from. Good Job.

      That Marine (or model?) is a clone of Laurence Fishburne of the Matrix movies.

  20. Mike Dunne says:

    I must be a small minded bastard! I did 6 years in Army Reserve (3 Artillery + 3 Armour) One Stripe Transport NCO. I Blahdy LOVED it! Still active in veterans stuff after 60 years! I belong to a brotherhood of Vets who include Admirals, Generals and Air Marshalls, who all treat me as a respected ‘Brother in Arms’ What more can a man want? LOVE IT! LOVE IT! LOVE IT!