David Gess; phony Marine colonel

| January 12, 2016

David Gess

Someone sent us their work on this David Gess fellow. He tells people that he’s a retired Marine colonel, that he flew F-4 Phantoms before he began in the intelligence field. He gives advice to cadets about how “military leadership compares to leadership in the corporate world”;


If you look at his Facebook page, he has pictures that are supposed to be him while he was in military school;

David Gess Cadet

Gess cadet 2

I don’t know if those are actually pictures of him or not, but what’s strange about those pictures is that there are no pictures of him in a Marine uniform. It just seems odd to me that he’d have pictures of himself as a cadet, but not as a Marine. I guess he doesn’t because he was never a Marine, according to the National Personnel Records Center;

David Gess FOIA

By the way, if you’re getting financial advice from him, you should probably stop doing that;

Gess suspension

Category: Phony soldiers

Comments (37)

Trackback URL | Comments RSS Feed

  1. Atkron says:

    Wow…his Facebook profile sure came down quick.

  2. B Woodman says:

    Asked for it
    You got it

    (with apologies to Toyota)

  3. Silentium Est Aureum says:

    Again, tip of the shit iceberg.

  4. Ex-PH2 says:

    Cambridge U, huh? Didn’t someone else claim to go there for something or other? Or was it that other school, Whatsis U?

    I guess these people think it’s hard to check these things out, but it isn’t. I would just love to hear his accent.

  5. GDContractor says:

    Did he have the coveted MOS of “expertise with weapons”? Steve Cushman’s wing man? I wonder if he has ever considered opening a Christian Taekwondo franchise. Maybe he would like a brochure.

  6. nbcguy54ACTUAL says:

    Gess who! Fuck you.

  7. A Proud Infidel®™ says:

    WHOA, no Martial Farts Black Belt, Sniper or POW claims? Has he claimed “Honorary Rank” status yet? I wonder if his ass isn’t jealous of the volume of shit that has come out of his mouth? He’s proof that shit can sprout limbs and walk, I wonder what else will be found out about him?

  8. Combat Historian says:

    F-4 Phantom driver, eh? Did he pilot the version from Revell or the one from Tamiya ???

  9. Grimmy says:


    Posers don’t know the culture.

    In the Corps, if you were an officer in another job slot (zoomie, arty, grunt, etc) and end up in Intel, it’s usually because you screwed the pooch to a seriously major degree in that other job slot.

    Moving to intel, for officers, is most often a form of internal exile.

    Example: The OIC of 2MarDiv G2 back in the early 80s was a Major that’d gotten shit canned from arty for transporting a truck load of 8″ arty shells with the fuses put into the fuse wells to “save cargo space”. We know no one died, otherwise, they’d have shit canned him to food services.

    I’m sure there are some officers that transfer to intel from other specialties who aren’t fuckups, if for no other reason than to confuse people. But, they’d be rather rare critters.

    • Hack Stone says:

      I work with a USMC Major who was a helicopter pilot now working Intel. His vision no longer us good enough for him to fly. Or so he says. I’ll start interrorgating him for the inside scoop tomorrow.

  10. Sorensen25 says:

    ^ That isn’t true anymore. I recruited for the MC and infantry, intel, and pilot are three of the hardest jobs to get as an officer because everybody wants to do them.

  11. Claw says:

    “Graduate of Millersburg Military Institute”

    Sounds pretty important, huh? Except that MMI is just a grades 6-12 private boarding school.

    He is listed as a graduate of the Class of 69.

    The school is now undergoing the throes of bankruptcy and is closing/has closed it’s doors due to declining enrollments.

  12. Jarhead says:

    Damn!!! Do I feel like a fool or what? Since he had claimed to have been a Marine, I took his investment advice and put our whole shebang in in the Ponzi Investment Company with guaranteed annuities starting in 2005. Ten years now and don’t have the first check. He was pretty slick, I’ll give him credit. First he had surgery, then some family members died, then his dog became ill with inoperable cancer of the rectum, finally HE had lost most all the money to some Nigerian scheme (wanting him to accept five million dollars for assisting in depositing money in his bank). The final straw was when he invested all our money in Magic Pigeon Turds which would cure baldness and short dick syndrome. All my hopes of being an NBA player went up in smoke.

  13. Jarhead says:

    Anybody on here old enough to remember “Hee-Haw”?????
    Until I saw the picture of the two dudes in uniform up at the beginning of the post, I had absolutely no idea “String Bean” (David Akeman, real name) had attended a military school. I’ll bet some of you other pervs remember those big boobs on the blonde.

  14. nunya says:

    I sent the link to this article to his church choir member and this was the reply:

    Bill: Interesting. Who are you, and why are you sending me this? I appreciate the information, but I am curious as to why you care about this.

    John (thatz my alias): Just a concerned person fighting against stolen valor is all. You were on this person’s friends list and the best way to combat that is with close friends.

    Bill: I have suspected this for a long time. He is my best bass singer in my church choir. He brags about all of the above quite a bit. What should I do about this?

    • Green Thumb says:

      What they can do is send this maggot packing.

      Dude looks like a closet pedophile and a church is a prime hunting ground.