James Alan Halstead; phony green beret

| February 28, 2017

Our friends at Green Beret Posers Exposed sent us their work on James Alan Halstead. He claims that he was a special forces qualified soldier in a Long Range Reconnaissance Platoon unit at Fort Bragg. In a story about his daughter, the Star News Online referred to him as a combat veteran. But here are some of the claims he made in social media;

Now for his actual military service records obtained under the auspices of the Freedom of Information Act from the National Personnel Records Center.

Service dates:
Reserves: 03/12/86-4/30/86
Active: 5/1/86-4/30/90
Reserve: 5/1/86-5/3/94

Status: Discharged
Rank: PFC
Decoration, Awards: Army Lapel Button, Army Service Ribbon, M16 Sharpshooter Badge, Parachute Badge, Army Good Conduct Medal

Schools: USASC&FG (Signal School Fort Gordon) 16 weeks Single Channel Radio Operator 1986
USAIS Basic Airborne 3 weeks 1986
860508-869708 Basic Training Fort Jackson
860711-861029 AIT Duty MOS 31C00 Fort Gordon
861030-861124 Basic Ann
870123-870319 31C1P HHT 1/17 Cav 82d ABN DIV
870320-870527 31C1P Co C 313 MI Bn Ft Bragg
870528-871001 31C1VA4 Trp D 1/17 Cav 82d ABN DIV
871002-870430 31C1P HHC 82d ABN DIV
870430 Released From Active Duty


Category: Phony soldiers

Comments (108)

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  1. MSGRetired says:

    82nd CAB had a Pathfinder Platoon attached when I was at Bragg. That turned into a Company at some point and they just folded the colors on it. There were no LRRP’s in any of the Aviation units. This Turd should of been proud of what he did. Airborne Paratrooper just wasnt good enough I guess.

  2. Carlton G. Long says:

    E3 in just 4 years…what a BEAST

  3. ChipNASA says:

    His facebook is WIDE OPEN about as much as his ass is about to be.


    GET EM’ BOYS!!!! (And girls)

  4. Combat Historian says:

    When I was enlisted, I was a straight-leg mortar maggot, and I’m darn proud of that. This airborne stud has done fucked up and is now on the poser list…was it worth it, dude ???

    • OldManchu says:

      Fellow leg mortar maggot here! Which gun were you on? M252 81mm here.

      • Combat Historian says:

        M30 4.2-inch (four-deuce) mortar transported in a gama goat carrier; I’m really old-school, I’m afraid…

        • Wilted Willy says:

          I really loved the old gama goat, now that was one cool ride. I turned the bilge pump on one time and blew shit all over my motor pool sargent! He never liked me after that! I wish I could find one of those to restore! I could have fun with it here on the lake!

        • OldManchu says:

          Lol. Old school is fine by me!

        • Martinjmpr says:

          I’m pretty sure the idea for Gama Goats was a Soviet operation to cripple the mobility of our mechanized forces. 😀

          Back in about 1987 when I was in Germany, our MI battalion was, I’m pretty sure, the last unit in USAREUR to have Gama Goats for some of their intercept vans.

          We had a field exercise out near the CZ border and the convoy from Katterbach (about 20 miles West of Nuernberg) was agonizingly slow – all because we had to go at the speed of the slowest vehicle – the Gama Goat!

          Is there anything worse than putting along at 25 mph on the Autobahn on a hot day for hours and hours and hours? I think it took us nearly 8 hours to get to our field site near Schneeberg.

          After that, the MI Battalion commander decreed that for the movement back to home station, the Gama Goats would go separately, accompanied (of course!) by the motor pool’s wrecker and contact maintenance vehicle since a breakdown was virtually inevitable.

          BTW I never understood why gama goats were painted camouflage. You can HEAR the damn things long before you SEE them so what is the point of camouflaging them? 😉

          • Combat Historian says:

            I got this money quote from wiki:

            “…In service in Vietnam, Gama Goats would often be sent out ahead of other vehicles in order to arrive at their destination at the same time…”

            I feel sorry for the goat drivers who had to leave well ahead of the rest of the convoy and be exposed to the tender mercies of the VC/NVA just so they’ll arrive at the same time as the rest of the convoy at the destination firebase…

            • Claw says:

              Gama Goats in Viet of the Nam? Mules, yes, Gama Goats, no.

              Pictures or it never happened.

              I defy the entire western free world to find and display just one picture (or a sworn affidavit from an in-country GI) of an M561/M792 being utilized by the US Army in Viet of the Nam.

              I’m a non believer in that statement from Wiki.

              • Combat Historian says:

                I’m agnostic on this one, since I was too young to serve in the Viet of the Nam, but that was what Wiki said. I will certainly be on the lookout for photos/accounts of Goats in Vietnam, if any of them infact exists…

              • Perry Gaskill says:

                Using Gamma Goats might have been a good tactic. The NVA could have been incapacitated by falling down laughing when they heard the Gamma Goats slowly approaching from somewhere in the next province.

              • rgr769 says:

                There were no Gama Goats in Vietnam. Although they may have been developed during the latter stages of the war, I doubt any were issued to units in RVN. I think they were initially issued to the 82nd at Bragg in 1971 or 1972. IIRC they were still somewhat experimental at that time. When I went to the SF course in 1972, our OPFOR for the big FTX at the end of the course consisted of 82nd troopers transported in Gama Goats.

                • Perry Gaskill says:

                  Never saw one in RVN, but I did hitch a ride once in a Gamma Goat while with the 1st Cav at Ft. Hood in ’72. It seemed like a solution in search of a problem.

          • David says:

            My wife was told she was the first female NCO in that unit in 1978 when it was still the 202d ASA.

            Hard as hell to fall asleep in one on a desert tank trail…but it can be done if you’re tired enough.

            Per Claw’s comment below – while it was Vietnam era (1969-1973 production) it was mainly in rework status until at least 1972 according to the original manufacturer. Given we were starting to draw down, I’m guessing few if any made it over to the war. http://www.vought.org/special/html/sgamaa.html

            • Claw says:

              David, I’m thinking no Gamma Goats at all ever made their way to Viet of the Nam.

              But, per a paragraph in your linked article, the only thing (IMO) a Gama Goat was good for was this:

              Jan-May 1965. Prototypes #3-#16 are completed and delivered for military evaluation. In one instance a vehicle was delivered to the Marine Base at Quantico, Virginia. Arriving on a Friday, the first use of the vehicle was to fill the rear body with ice and beer for the weekly weekend party.

              BZ to the Marines!! They knew what to do with that POS vehicle from the start.

              The M561/M792 Gama Goat and I have a lot of history together. Starting in 1972 through 1981, I was a motor pool parts clerk in three separate Air Defense Artillery units that had Goats as the prime mover for the Vulcan gun system and carried the FAAR radar system. I have no idea how many thousands (maybe hundreds of thousands) of parts requisitions and work orders I submitted for replacement repair parts for that vehicle, but I sure know the Army got took for a ride when it was accepted into the inventory to replace the M37B 3/4 Ton Truck.

              • David says:

                I suspect we have a post in common; my experience with a Goat on a tank trail was at a post shared with all you duckhunters…many years later, though, I didn’t get there till ’85.

                • Dustoff says:

                  The fucking Gama Goat was invented by Satan and his minions as way to sabotage our great nation….that is all.

  5. 2/17 Air Cav says:

    It is easy to overlook the “combat veteran” tag that was assigned in the paper. Reporters frequently embellish or don’t have a clue when it comes to matters military. But that social network business is another story altogether. That’s not the reporter’s doing. And, now, a little girl has to (sooner or later) realize that Dad lied. Nice going Jimbo.

  6. borderbill (a NIMBY/BANANA) says:

    Attn: All Hands
    Facebook and other “social media” is for use by teenage girls only. Haven’t you people learned this yet?!

  7. A Proud Infidel®™ says:

    He now has a bucket of internet fame, what a LOSER!

  8. Mick says:


    Ugh. Here we go again.

    You are cleared hot.

  9. Mick says:

    Heh heh heh.

    Good to see that the phony SF/LRRPs are stepping up to the plate and doing their best to catch up to all of the phony SEALs that we’ve had to endure around here lately.

    The next question is: where are the phony USMC Force Recon/Snipers these days? C’mon, fellas! We’re waiting!

    Heh heh heh.

    • Combat Historian says:

      Don’t forget about the USCG Coastie rescue swimmers; Kevin Costner made a movie about them, after all…

  10. 2/17 Air Cav says:

    I once rescued myself, thanked me, and gave myself a medal. That has to count for something.

  11. Martinjmpr says:

    A couple of things jumped out on me from the record of assignments:

    First off, minor quibble: That last entry date for release from active duty should be 890430 not 870430 (IOW April 30, 1989 not Apr 30, 1987.) 😉

    Second, from 870528 – 871001 his duty MOS was 31C1VA4. For those not familiar with Army MOS designations, I’ll break it down:

    31C is the basic Military Occupational Specialty, in his case, single channel radio operator. the next “1” is the skill level, which is for enlisted grades E1-E4.

    But after that comes the SQI and ASI (The SQI is the 5th character and the ASI are 6 and 7.)

    Not everybody gets an SQI or ASI. A non airborne grunt, for example, would simply carry the MOS of 11B10.

    Normally all personnel assigned to an airborne division like the 82nd would carry the SQI of “P” (for “Parachutist”) on their MOS, meaning airborne qualified. Notice all of his previous duty MOS’s listed had the “P” SQI.

    But “V” means “Ranger-Parachutist” and normally V-coded slots are only for positions that require forward deployment into the field for extended periods of time. IIRC a soldier who is in a V-coded position carries a priority to be assigned to ranger school (because technically speaking, until he’s completed Ranger school, he is not fully MOS qualified.)

    My guess is that he was assigned as an RTO (Radio operator) to the LRS-D (Long Range Surveillance Detachment) that was part of 5/17 Cav when the LRS units were reestablished in the late 80’s. He was in the LRS detachment long enough to pick up the lingo but not long enough to get sent to Ranger school.

    I have no idea what the “A4” ASI was, but I can guess it was probably long range surveillance. A quick Google search shows that currently the A4 ASI is some kind of electrical system repairman but that doesn’t mean that’s what it was in 1987 (when the LRS concept was being revived.)

    It’s possible he washed out of pre-Ranger, got injured, got “peered out” or just quit. I notice that they didn’t keep him in the Cav squadron, he was sent all the way back to Division HQ.

    Obviously never a “green beret” but it does appear he spent some time in a LRS unit.

    • J Downey says:

      A4 was for Morse Code Qualified. In 85 it was 15 words/minute

      • Martinjmpr says:

        That would make perfect sense since morse was a backup form of comms for LRS units.

        • Hondo says:

          It was also the way SF teams communicated in the early 1980s. That fact – plus a knowledge of Morse – may well have helped him convince folks he’d been SF.

      • Commissar says:

        I was in a Victor slot for years in LLVI but because of the politics of ranger school in the 90s my mos was on a restricted list (it was a proactive attempt at preventing women from attending) By the time they resolved that bullshit and removed the restriction I had a torn ACL and was less than 8 months from ETS. The V slot does not necessarily give you priority.

        • ex-OS2 says:

          “I was in a Victor slot for years in LLVI but because of the politics of ranger school in the 90s my mos was on a restricted list”

          Always an excuse with you.

          • Hondo says:

            Poodle might have a valid point this time around, ex-OS2. See his linked article below.

            Ranger slots can be hard to come by, and as I recall certain specialties (and certain units) did seem to have a harder time getting a slot than others.

            • ex-OS2 says:

              “(it was a proactive attempt at preventing women from attending) By the time they resolved that bullshit and removed the restriction I had a torn ACL and was less than 8 months from ETS.”

              That very well may be true, I was referring to the follow-up blah blah not my fault, blah blah blah resolved bullshit, blah blah blah ACL, blah blah ETS….

              “I coulda had class. I coulda been a contender. I coulda been somebody, instead of a bum, which is what I am, let’s face it.”

              I may as well mention:

              Don’t fear the commie!

            • rgr769 says:

              Yes, it is very difficult to get to Ranger School when you are the intel officer in a mess-kit repair–er, Civil Affairs Group.

        • Jack says:

          Sounds like they saved you the trouble of washing out.

        • A Proud Infidel®™ says:

          ARE YOU SURE you didn’t have Sandinmanginitis, Babbles McButthead?

        • 26Limabeans says:

          “(it was a proactive attempt at preventing women from attending)”

          You might want to re phrase that.
          Or not.

    • Commissar says:

      Here is some commentary about the problem back then. https://www.thefreelibrary.com/The+case+for+the+MI+Ranger.-a0101862300

      • A Proud Infidel®™ says:

        Find yourself someone who gives a fuck (IT AIN’T ME) to call a *WAAAAAAAAHH*mbulance to come give you a peanut butter sandwich, some fresh Kool-Aid and a group hug while everyone else sings “Kum-ba-yah” for you and if you’ve been a good little pinko today they might give you a nice warm enema before your bedtime, Babbles McButthead!

      • rgr769 says:

        Hey you fucking REMF dipshit, this ass-wipe phony was a radio operator who is now trying to pass himself off as a combat veteran SF qualified Ranger serving in a Long Range Recon unit, when he never saw a day in combat anywhere and his only qualification besides being able to hump a radio and squeeze a push-to-talk switch was the ability to jump out of an airplane. And he even lied about that–72 jumps my ass! You are a world class pussy, yourself, and never would have survived the first peer review of Ranger School, if you made it past the first (Benning) phase.

    • Les Pegram says:

      I had just left A Troop (Aero Rifle Platoon) in OCT. The A, B and C Troop ARP’s were used to form the 82nd LRSD (E-Troop), along with volunteers from the Division, begining JAN87……. “870528-871001 31C1VA4 Trp D 1/17 Cav 82d ABN DIV” D Troop was formed mid-86 and was comprised of 19D’s and were ground recon, mounted and dismounted. D-Troop was comprised of three platoons, each supporting and infantry brigade. 1SG Macaborski was the original 1SG.

  12. Martinjmpr says:

    Whoops sorry for the acronym avalanche. SQI = Skill Qualification Identifier and ASI = Additional Skill Identifier. ASI’s are often found in areas like Military Intelligence where they can indicate things like what languages the soldier is able to speak, special training, etc.

  13. Martinjmpr says:

    A bit more elaboration: Notice that from 870320 – 870527 he was assigned to C Co, 313th MI Battalion. The 313th is the Military Intelligence Battalion that was permanently assigned to the 82nd Airborne Division.

    When the Army revived the LRS concept in the late 1980s, the original thought was that, since they were an “intelligence” asset, they should be assigned to one of the operational companies of the Divisional Military Intelligence Battalion.

    However, they quickly came to realize that assigning infantrymen to a Military Intelligence unit wasn’t really a good fit – the MI units didn’t have the staff nor the equipment to really keep an Infantry detachment properly trained and supervised.

    So, after a short time they transferred the LRS from the divisional MI battalion to the divisional Cav squadron. Being a combat arms unit, putting the LRS in the Cav squadron was a better fit.

    • 19D2OR4 - Smitty says:

      To be fair, I am currently in a V coded position on my units MTOE and we are a Bradley unit. I have neither Airborne nor Ranger, nor will I even be sent to either.

  14. ChipNASA says:

    OK it’s time…..(Updated NEW AND IMPROVED!)

    James “Jimbo” Alan Halstead allegedly work balls, tickles taint and tongue punches hobo’s crusty fart boxes all, I Guess, while being a syphilitic, pile infested, inflamed, gaping, Cambodian cunt sauce, ball working asshole, shit tonguing, cock gobbling, sperm burping, sniveling, lying, Bowl of ass soup, worthless, waste of oxygen, snowball, shitbag, moron, asshat, dick pickle, helmet wearing short bus riding window licker, knob gobbling, Assistant Jizz mopper in training, inbred, catcher not pitcher, impotent koekeloeren, slaptard, mumpsimus, douche nozzle, might but not certain, like to molest small farm animals, dead and alive, is a hemorrhoid, schlong juice, Milksop, puss soaked jackwagon, Pettifogger, butt munch, not a Green Beret, not a LRRPer, insult to humanity, Handgallop, twat, tool, bint, sleezebag, weaksauce, fuck hole, Pilsburry Dough Bitch, Turd-Burglar, rimjobber, cum-dumpster, rectal inspector, gonad, chicken shit, dopus, Blue Falcon and Blue Waffle, twizzletits, tallywacker, Bozack, Felcher, dingleberry, bitch, Saprophyte, ATM, pap smear, gimp, bescumber, coccydynia, sack of siberian sheep shit, micropeen, turd burglar, possibly likes to pick his teeth with Bernath’s used catheters, Hircismus, cheat, Cacafuego, Cock-juggling *Pussy* thundercunt.

    Here endith the lesson.

    • Wilted Willy says:

      Chip, no need to hold back so much, don’t worry about the little snowflakes feelings, go ahead and tell him what you really think? COCKSUCKER!

      • LiRight says:

        I don’t know – It would have taken me three hours to write what Chip wrote above….suffice it to say that this moron is an ASSHOLE – kind of encompasses all of what Chip wrote!

    • Mick says:



    • LiRight says:



      That’s the best one yet!

      In honor of two of my sons in SF (one active and one retired medically) I’d gladly kick this guys ass!!

    • ChipNASA says:


      I have this as a word document and saved it on my desktop. I add to it when I get the feeling but I do personalize it.

      ALSO I stole Fuck You Ass Hamster from HMCS(FMF) ret but I also said I was going to do it so, in conclusion,

      James Alan Halstead; phony green beret GOOGLE HIT!!!


      • LiRight says:


      • Dinotanker says:

        LOL! I would think the HMCS(FMF) is honored that he contributed to the ChipNASA ready rack of artistic and eloquent profanity.

        Being a bumpkin from the Pacific Northwest, I cannot in good conscience leave good ammo on the ground. TAH has expanded my meager supply of “Heat Rounds” with such upgrades as Sparklepony as well as Ass Hamster. THANKS TO YOU ALL! 🙂

        • ChipNASA says:

          Adding Sparklepony to the listing.

          *NOTICE*, If for any reason I find any more of your eloquence in profanity used here on TAH that is worthy (not a really high bar is it?), I will be stealing it and adding it to the list.

    • ex-OS2 says:

      I fucking love it!

      BZ, ChipNASA!

    • Green Thumb says:


      What he said….

    • SFC D says:

      Brought a tear to my eye and warmed the cockles of my black Irish heart.

      • 2/17 Air Cav says:

        I’m rather partial to “Assistant Jizz mopper in training.”

        • ChipNASA says:

          That is entirely mine.
          I’ve been told I’m somewhat of a sick individual.
          I take that as a compliment.

  15. HMCS(FMF) ret says:

    Another ball sack working, taint tickling, man hole inspecting, cocksucking, ass hamster!

    Enjoy the fame JAMES ALAN HALSTEAD… and I personally hope that your daughter kicks your fucking ass when she finds out what a liar you are.

  16. Graybeard says:

    James Alan Halstead has betrayed his daughter Lauren’s trust.
    James Alan Halstead has lied to his own family.
    James Alan Halstead had a perfectly honorable career, and decided to use it for toilet paper.
    James Alan Halstead is a pathetic liar, a loser of a father, a shame to his family.

  17. Martinjmpr says:

    Ha ha, just read his Facebook stuff. The Army spent all that money sending him to the “Q Course” and then assigned him to hump a radio in the 82nd. Crazy Army!

    Then his buddy David Marshall chimes in and asks him what special forces “division” he was in. Bro, do you even Army? 😀

    • Combat Historian says:

      5th Special Forces Division really kicked ass in Vietnam; its three green beret brigades fought from the DMZ right down to the Ca Mau Peninisula. It was one hell of a division !!! (Sarc)

      • rgr769 says:

        What I am really proud of is my service in the mess-kit repair battalion in one of those green beret brigades. We could rivet a new handle onto a mess-kit dish faster than you can say Veet Cong.

  18. IDC SARC says:

    Funny, all this time I’ve been Active Duty and a DA Civilian at SWCS, the only time our I see our GB students getting orders to the 82nd is when they fail out.

    It must actually be due to super secret reasons above my pay grade, I guess. 🙂

  19. Frankie Cee says:

    From March 2011:
    How much active duty time did this turd have?
    My comment on that:
    Frankie Cee: Over 70 jumps, one enlistment, and discharged as an E-3? I am calling bullshit on that.

    • ex-OS2 says:

      Jimmy is scrubbing as fast as he can. He made it back to 2012 and still going.

    • Hondo says:

      Not impossible, FC. At Bragg, in the early 1980s there were “fun jumps” most weekends that counted as military static-line jumps. I presume the same was true in the mid/late 1980s as well.

      All you had to do was show up at St Mere-Eglise DZ (it had a strip); the birds landed there, took on jumpers, went to altitude, and you jumped. (I believe you had to bring certain paperwork with you as well – but it’s been 35+ years or so now, so I’m not positive.) Jumps continued until they ran out of parachutes or the birds had to leave due to fuel/flight hours expended (generally UH1s or C7As as I recall).

      Getting 2 or even 3 jumps in one weekend was possible. Getting 2 or 3 (or more) such jumps a month, weather and aircraft availability permitting, was eminently doable if you wanted to “chase silk” badly enough.

      Add that to unit jumps, and getting 73 jumps in 3 years or so on jump status is indeed possible. Not saying this tool did it – but it IS possible.

      • ex-OS2 says:

        Based upon the other bullshit on Fat Jimmy’s FB, I think he was eluding to over 70 Combat jumps.

        • Hondo says:

          I took it to mean total jumps.

          But you’re right – a claim of 70+ “combat jumps” would indeed be pure male bovine organic fertilizer.

      • Martinjmpr says:

        They used to publicize the “fun jumps” in the Fort Bragg newspaper (wasn’t it called the “Paraglide?”)

        The rule was that you were supposed to bring your ID card and a copy of your hazardous duty orders putting you on jump status. After that, you’d get put on the manifest and could jump.

        I heard stories (second hand, of course) of “leg” troopers at Bragg who just showed up, signed in, went through pre-jump and actually jumped. As much of a goat-rope/cluster fuck as it often was, I could see that happening.

      • Legans says:

        Once a month, over at Sicily DZ, the Reserve and National Guard pilots would fly Hueys and Shithooks for their annual quals and you could get a chute for a Hollywood jump or two (you had to elbow your way into line with a few pouge Majors and Short Colonels sometimes.) Then there was always the fun of strap hanging at the Jump Master course; that could be fun for a real dick buddy of mine (he was a real asshole.) I was 2-325 for four years and I did 70 jumps using all of those tricks. There was nothing going on at the time (79-82) so none of them were combat or anything as cool as that.

  20. rgr769 says:

    An E-3 after over 3 years AD says I do as little as possible and try to get by. I’d be surprised if he ever volunteered for an extra jump, even if it was totally “Hollywood” (that means with no equipment for you NAPs).

    • Hondo says:

      Concur, rgr769. My discussion above was cautionary only. While IMO I think it’s very unlikely (for the same reasons you do), what the tool claims re: his number of jumps is not impossible given his record of assignments.

  21. Veritas Omnia Vincit says:

    Wow E-3? Stellar performer no doubt….

    Way to shit on your service zippy…

  22. Green Thumb says:


  23. wilnel says:

    we got this 45 ish year old female SSg, she like to tell everybody her father was a tank commander in vietnam

  24. Old 1SG, US Army (retired) says:

    I’m sure this guy was a LRRP… I mean discharged as a private, he did get a good conduct medal, and he used the phrase “hitch was up” when describing what he did after the service. Yeah all those real old timers used “hitch” even back in the ’80s… Yeah, right!

    What a dipsh*t… and on top of it all he’s giving all the commo guys a bad name

  25. Starbux says:

    Wow he really knows how to progress in rank. E3 after 4 years. I am guessing this guy spent most of his enlistment cleaning shitters and raking the leaves.