Paul Gilman; phony drone pilot

| April 18, 2017

There’s this fellow out West by the name of Paul Gilman. He tried to fool folks in Colorado Springs into letting him out of his obligations early by claiming that he is an Air Force drone pilot and he was being transferred to the Marine Corps Recruit Depot, San Diego, California. So he gave the locals this set of orders;

There is no Lieutenant Chief in any of the military services, who would let a lieutenant be a chief anyway?

The Air Force says “Who?”

As you can tell from the mugshot at the top of this page, he has a record. Not military, but a record, nonetheless.

Category: Phony soldiers

Comments (93)

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  1. sj says:

    But does he have any ribbons upon which to attach the new R(EMF) device?

  2. IDC SARC says:

    Da fukk?

  3. Wilted Willy says:

    Well, isn’t this a first here at TAH? A phony drone pilot?? Who the fuck claims that for christ sakes?? No doo rag either………..

    • Veritas Omnia Vincit says:

      Agreed, not a lot of that….on another note how did your eye surgery turn out???

      • Wilted Willy says:

        Hi VOV, left eye turned out great, I get the right one done on the 16th then I should be good to go. Thanks for asking!

    • Ret_25X says:

      The stolen valor guide may have to have a volume 2 for drone pilots….no doo rag, a silk scarf…no dog, but a my little pony…

      you get the drift…LOL

  4. Ex-PH2 says:

    Phony drone pilot? Well, day-um! That’s a semi-creative approach! Is there a PDP award available? Perhaps a winged jackass carrying a missile, or something?

  5. Graybeard says:

    You can’t make this stuff up. No one would believe it if you put this in a story (well, maybe if the author had Ex-PH2’s mad writing skilz, but…)

    • Ex-PH2 says:

      Yeah, but he has the rank backwards, Graybeard.

      Everybody knows – and I mean, EVERYBODY – that it is not Lieutenant Chief. It’s ‘Chief Lieutenant’. Comes after LT2 and LT1 and way below LTCL.

      I thought everybody knew that. This guy’s an amateur.

    • HMC Ret says:

      PH be a goode riter n stuf.

  6. Sgt M says:

    He is soon to be promoted to Corporal-Captain by his General- Airman.

  7. Cobrakai99 says:

    Central Air Command? Are they the ones coming to fix my AC this week?

  8. Doc Savage says:


    His date of rank is “M 679″…..the M679 is an OLD Army Jeep van / Ambulance conversion.

    I think they were finally taken out of the inventory in the mid to late 70’s.

    This fidiot just decided to play scrabble and toss random letters and numbers all over the place….

  9. Combat Historian says:

    That’s a nice set of orders, although I’m having trouble discerning whether he’s been assigned to the Rebel Alliance or the Galactic Empire…

  10. Hossman says:

    Lt Chief. That’s funny and creative. When I was assigned to my first joint unit, the senior enlisted advisor was a Master Chief. I was an AF Captain (O3) and every morning I saw him I would say “Morning Chief” (Chief being the highest enlisted honorific in the AF, I thought I was paying proper respect). He would correct me and say “Master Chief”. This went on a couple of more times until one morning I said “Morning Chief” and he replied “Morning Lieutenant”. I stopped and looked at him and he said, “If you want to call me by Air Force rank, then I’ll call you by Navy rank”. From then on, I had no problem saying “Morning Master Chief”.

  11. thebesig says:

    That’s not a set of orders, but something that looks like a DA 4651, an Army form to request transfer or assignment to a reserve component unit.

    I’ve recently submitted an updated version of that form as part of my retirement packet. It’s a form that’s also a part of a packet to request transfer from one drilling unit to another, or from one reserve unit to a Individual Mobilization Augmentee, Individual Ready Reserve, Standby Reserve, or Retired Reserve.

    Should the packet be approved, orders get posted, which is what should’ve been shown had this been the real deal. This just illustrates how phonies don’t realize that their lack of knowledge of little things like this makes it look like they have neon signs pointing to them as phonies.

    • Ex-PH2 says:

      The real question is how did he get his hands on it?

      • IDC SARC says:

        Anyone can download most standard government forms from the forms website

        Unless that’s changed. I’ve downloaded forms for my lessons without having to use my CAC authentication

        Here,s a download for a DA4651

        • thebesig says:

          That’s right, you could download many of these forms from the internet, the Army has an online version of its publishing site where Soldiers can download necessary DA forms.

          Back Paul Gilman, phony veteran, phony military member.

          It’s also supposed to be from him to the approving authority, via the intervening echelons. Not from the approving authority to him. Piss poor judgement on his part to act without thinking but, as we all can see, his phoniness is just to tip of the iceberg.

  12. Atkron says:

    Totally Legit..this guy was screwed.

  13. Dean Fischer says:

    I can always use a good laugh in the morning

  14. Combat Historian says:

    His PEBD is “Rc648”; he must be using the Imperial Galactic Stardate Calendar to calculate how much time he got left in the Imperial Military before he get to retire…

  15. wow… light(Lt)in the loafers chief butt hugger phallic squeezer should’ve at least did some research before writing up his fake orders, their are more holes in those orders than the colander I have in a kitchen.

    when I was a kid about 7 yrs old, had this toy radio controlled blimp called “Helios 5” used to fly it all around the house, maybe he tried one of those out he found in a vintage toy shop and thought he was a USAF drone pilot

    • 2/17 Air Cav says:

      Damn your childhood. I had balsa wood and a freakin’ rubber band.

      • My dads hobby was radio controlled airplanes, and many a Sunday afternoon we were out at the local puddle jumper/bug smasher airport flying them with the club of enthusiasts he belonged too and I got to be the retriever for the ones that crashed, also learned to repair them, always had neat stuff like that I had to share with my Lil’ bro to mess around with. That’s what influenced me to go USAF, my dad was a Navy man tho, tin can sailor

      • Graybeard says:

        Those things could get pretty fancy, though.

        • not so much in the early 60’s, they were fairly basic…mostly high wing Piper Cub looking or low wing Bonanza type(not the v tail) 1/2 to 2 hp maybe even 3 hp engines…wing span from 1 ft too 5 ft covered in fabric over balsa spars and longerons with a small aluminum firewall engine support , 1 guy did have a 2 ft P-47 if I recall correctly, they all seemed to have a tendency to yaw in the direction of the propeller rotation and needed to be countered with opposite rudder input since their was no way to trim them as with a real aircraft.
          Their were quite a few repairable crack ups, that’s why all the club members had 2 or 3 planes that they would bring with them, but everyone had loads of fun

      • HMC Ret says:

        In 50s/60s I made kites from very thin balsa wood and paper grocery store bags (no plastic back then) or newspaper. Some of those things actually went nearly out of sight.

    • Martinjmpr says:

      when I was a kid about 7 yrs old, had this toy radio controlled blimp called “Helios 5” used to fly it all around the house, maybe he tried one of those out he found in a vintage toy shop and thought he was a USAF drone pilot

      “Helios 5” sounds like the name of a prog-rock band.

      • it was about 3-4 foot long made of thin mylar filled with helium with a small electric motor and receiver, with a joy stick transmitter, it could ascend, descend , back up go, left or right and knock over moms decorations and lamps quite well

    • just some feller says:

      …butt hugger phallic squeezer…

      Say, that’s got quite a ring to it … is that up on ChipNASA’s “Wall-O-Shame/Insults™”? If not, I wish to propose the addition, perhaps modified as:

      Butt-Hugging Phallic-Squeezer/


  16. 2/17 Air Cav says:

    Methinks he thought himself clever, using what he knew to be some made up stuff on the form. ‘Hey, you can’t charge me with that! There is no LT. Chief rank, so there’s no crime!’ Wrong. You is screwed Paulie. Screw-ed.

  17. Thunderstixx says:

    Turd burglar…
    Any word on danny-boi???
    He has a court date coming up soon. I hope he’s lead out of the courtroom to the jail in handcuffs.
    Now THAT would be a pretty picture !!!

    • Fjardeson says:

      Check the home page, Thunder. He got 365 days in the home of Julio, Thor, Bubba and Mr. “Tiny”, but is appealing.

      • AZtoVA says:

        Appealing so he has time to do his ‘stretching’ exercises before reporting to the gym…

  18. Daisy Cutter says:

  19. Silentium Est Aureum says:

    So full of fail it would be much easier to point out what he got right.

  20. OldManchu says:

    Faking a SEAL or Ranger is so yesterday. Drone pilot is the new deal.

  21. Martinjmpr says:

    That fake set of orders is one of the most unintentionally funny things I’ve seen in years.

    I love the way he basically just put random letters and numbers in for things he didn’t understand like his RYE (retirement year ending) date being 10-7 (from my security guard days, I think “10-7” is an code that means “out of service.”)

    Oh, and “Strike Force Alpha” was his assignment? Hmmm…wasn’t “Strike Force Alpha” the name of one of the cheesy movies that the robots made fun of on Mystery Science Theater 3000? 😀

    “Leslie Johnson, Classified, CSAR” – was he trying to name drop Kelly Johnson of the Lockheed “Skunk Works” here?

    I think this guy learned all of his military lingo playing video games.

    • IDC SARC says:

      Marcus Fenix was my platoon sergeant during the pedulum wars

    • Ncat says:

      “Leslie Johnson, Classified, CSAR” – was he trying to name drop Kelly Johnson of the Lockheed “Skunk Works” here?

      No. He’s making a veiled reference to his own, err, shortcomings- Les Johnson.

  22. TankBoy says:

    I don’t care what it was, it was awesome! And I’m sure he would be most welcome at MCRD San Diego. At least at the sand pit next to the Recruit PX for a little while.

  23. Bobo says:

    Because no landlord in Colorado Springs has ever seen a set of orders. Moron.

  24. Josnik says:

    I’m coming around on the idea that all of these fakers should be forced to serve. Of course, almost all of them would recycle during IET, so keep putting them through the course. If they have to do four years of service in Red Phase, so be it. Someone has to paint rocks and serve hot chow in the field.

    Then, if by some miracle they graduate Basic, put them in AIT for the new 00Z MOS; the permanent detail MOS. Have them specialize in being available for area beautification, police calls, bathroom cleaning and basically anything else that has to be done but isn’t tied to an existing MOS.

    • Martinjmpr says:

      No, I’m thinking a week of basic training followed by an immediate assignment to the Human Mine Detector Platoon in Afghanistan or Iraq.

    • 11B-Mailclerk says:

      “The Retiring CSM’s gopher”.

      Now -there- would be a hellish assignment…..

    • IDC SARC says:

      It sounds good, but….nah.

      Nobody in the active forces should be subjected to these idiots nor should they be given the opportunity to claim injury,disability, mistreatment, etc after being forced into such a situation.

    • David says:

      Permanent Detail MOS – would that be PLO?

      gotta be old for that one…

  25. Green Thumb says:

    “There is no Lieutenant Chief in any of the military services, who would let a lieutenant be a chief anyway?”

    All-Points Logistics would. That’s who.

  26. Fjardeson says:

    A phony… drone pilot? You’ve gotta be kidding. Reminds me of the line in The Untouchables where Sean Connery tells Kevin Costner, “Who would call themselves that, who were not?”

  27. HMC Ret says:

    The date is improperly formatted. The block asks for YYYYMODD. He gives the date as 03/13/2017. He can’t even follow the basic demands of his gundecked document. Date should be 20170313. He’s ignorant of military matters but he is entertaining.

    At least he’s not a SEAL. Hey, that would have been cool. He could have been a LT.SEAL.Chief (Ret). Now that would have been way cool.

    I often still find myself writing dates in military format, w/o even thinking about doing so. Old habits …

    Anyhoo, this guy has zero working knowledge of the military. His document issues are all over the map, including his being a LT.Chief, improper date format, etc. I guess everything he knows about the military and NORAD he learned from the movie ‘War Games’. Good movie, BTW.

  28. HMC Ret says:

    Make that YYYYMMDD, NOT YYYYMODD. Shit, now I’m confused.

  29. Mike W says:

    I’m loving the line and paragraph. (flight and classified) too funny

  30. Skippy says:

    And another hits da crapper with a BIG Splash
    Enjoy your google fame moron

  31. Dennis - not chevy says:

    The 102 Recon Division? Wasn’t that the unit the TSgt belonged to in Battle Los Angeles? I could be wrong.

  32. Claw says:

    Those orders were a No-Go from the start.

    Everybody knows you can’t PCS to anywhere without the clearance stamp from CIF, regardless of your branch of service./smile

    Didn’t return your canteen cover or woobie? Stay Put. No exceptions.

  33. Dennis - not chevy says:

    The Autovon number is a license plate number – it’s on an auto therefore it must be right.

  34. Mark Lauer says:

    Well, this is a first. Someone claiming to be a drone pilot, and not a Special Operations Navy SEAL Recon Green Beret Ranger Drone Pilot.

  35. HMC Ret says:

    Sooo much wrong where does one begin? Who knew Central Air Command had a Recon Division? Dates alternate between correct and incorrect formats. It would be nice if he knew how to spell ‘Commander’. I’m pretty sure it’s not Comander.

    There is stupid and then there is weapons-grade stupid. If there is a degree of stupidity beyond weapons-grade, this guy is their poster child. Da-dumb, da-dumb, …

  36. HMC Ret says:

    What was the underlying issue that caused him to submit an obviously bogus document? Trying to break an apartment lease? Nothing like trying to pass an obviously gundecked military/government document in a city with a large military presence.

    Alex, I’ll take Weapons-Grade Stupidity for $1000. So, Gilman, describe to us what it’s like to be in the warm embrace of Julio and Mr. Tiny. Oh, and welcome to your ‘humiliation is forever’ star of shame on Google. Congrats, Homes. Future generations of your family will be sooo proud.

    And thank you for your service to country as a drone operator. Bwhaaaa

  37. Mike Kozlowski says:

    …I read that form, and I actually felt my IQ dropping.

  38. mattinnc says:

    WTF? Also, WTF is a Lt. Chief?

  39. The Old Maj says:

    If your IQ is in the high 70s the life of a phony SEAL might seem an unachievable dream. Being a phony drone operator is more in line with life expectations.

  40. Bones says:

    Just saw ex-OS2 bring it, and no response, so….


  41. Bones says:

    and oh, I think I have brain damage from reading those “orders”…