Robert Kelly; Canadian Phony

| June 20, 2017

Our friends at Stolen Valour-Canada send us their work to get Robert Kelly some cross-border love.

We were recently asked to review a number of photographic images of “Sergeant” Robert Kelly who resides in the Leamington, Ontario area.

Our review identified many inconsistencies in his dress / appearance and, when combined with his confusing claims of service, that has given us cause to question his entire military narrative.

Our team conducted a thorough review of all available records, this included websites, newspaper articles, photographic images, regimental tour books, searchable data bases of medal recipients and extracts from military documents in Canada in order to determine the legitimacy of his claims.

SV-C then reached out to the regimental associations, their museums and other organizations in which Kelly has claimed to have served. The publicly accessible records, that we have had the opportunity to review, do not support the majority of his claims. That being said, the absence of verifiable records alone does not conclusively prove that an individual is a fake or embellisher, it just indicates that there are no records…

Kelly has alluded to being a WW2 Veteran yet, he was born in Douglastown, New Brunswick in 1936. Now, we are not mathematical geniuses but, those numbers just don’t work… Therefore, question becomes, is he a legitimate Korean War Veteran, a Cold War era Veteran or, is he a Veteran at all?

In addition to his World War 2 foolishness, he has also claimed over the years to be an infantryman with The RCR “SPECIAL FORCES” (1953-1959), a “sky trooper”(whatever the hell that is!), a “NATO Peacekeeper” in Europe, a Code Talker, a Korean War Veteran, a British trained commando and, quite amazingly, he claims to have served in the Canadian Airborne Regiment over a decade before it was formed in April 1968.

Judging by the extensive press coverage he has received over the years, it appears that he’s being pimped as the veteran “go to guy”. The leadership of the Windsor Veterans Memories Project have showcased Mr Kelly at many of their events so, one would assume that they must have verified his military service. Factual errors and omissions occur due to misremembering & that can be forgiven. However, complete fabrications, not so much…

In the old style Battle Dress uniform image, he’s wearing a highly unlikely, and quite confusing display of medal ribbons including the (1) unofficial Aboriginal Millennium Medallion in the senior position, (2) followed by the 2 x WW2 ribbons (including the France & Germany Star), (3) the Special Service Medal NATO, (4) the Canadian Peacekeeping Service Medal without any accompanying tour medal , (5) the Coronation Medal, (6) the Canadian Decoration indicating a minimum of 12 years of good conduct and loyal service, (7) the Commissionares Long Service Medal, (8) the Service Medal of the Order of St John (without its accompanying ribbon) is often worn on his right lapel & there’s are some sort of parachutist wings on his left breast pocket.

On a stand up poster prominently displayed in the Windsor area, Kelly’s story included the following -“While in Europe, his tours included Germany, England & Holland. A highly trained reconnaissance soldier, as part of a 30 man reconnaissance team. He would gain information on Germany during the day, and then inform his Commanding Officer in the morning”

Was he alluding that he’s a WW2 vet who gathered information on the Nazis or, is he implying that he crossed the IGB and was gathering intelligence on Warsaw Pact Forces? Wearing the France and Germany Star leads us to believe that he was proclaiming himself to be a WW2 Vet!

In the more recent/current images, he’s wearing a maroon blazer along with maroon beret & any evidence of his claimed WW2 service has been removed.

The constant on his many make-believe uniforms is the Queen’s Coronation Medal. That particular medal was presented to just 15 junior ranks of the 2nd Bn of The RCR, all combat veterans/paratroopers who were members the Canadian Contingent in London, England during the 1953 ceremony. Not surprisingly, Mr Kelly’s name is not on that list…

He also says that he met the Queen in Picadilly Circus, and he talks about JOHN Prince (Does he mean Sergeant Tommy Prince MM of the 2nd Bn PPCLI?) who he claims he was forgotten by his regiment and family!

Other than the Queen’s Diamond Jubilee Medal, which he is a bonafide recipient, and the Special Service Medal (NATO) which he would have been awarded for his limited service in Europe, what’s the story regarding the other medals he’s been sporting?

This includes the Canadian Decoration (CD), which requires 12 years of qualifying service and good conduct so, how can an individual who claims only 6 years of service (1953-59) be entitled? Additionally, there’s absolutely no evidence that he’s eligible “peacekeeping service” to wear the Canadian Peacekeeping Service Medal.

We believe Mister Kelly may have found himself in a situation in which his stories, unchecked embellishment & outright lies finally caught up with him, and he was finding it difficult to extract himself. SV-C was prepared to assist with correcting this situation if and when Kelly made contact with us.

*What we do know.*

Private Bob Kelly, actually served in the Canadian Army as an infantryman with the 2nd Bn, The Royal Canadian Regiment in NW Europe. This was followed by a number of short time periods of service as a reservist in the Royal New Brunswick Regiment and the Windsor Regiment. He never advanced past the rank of PRIVATE during any of his actual service nor, did he get anywhere near the 12 year threshold to be awarded the Canadian Forces Decoration (CD).

SV-C reached out to Kelly in order to clarify the situation & he has not responded. But, the President of the Windsor Historical Society – Veterans’ Memories Project jumped into the discussion, vouched for Kelly’s service, and states he has all the paper work to back it up his buddy’s claims. However, he has refused to release the information so it could be independently verified and, has threatened SV-C with legal action, because we had “slandered an innocent soldier”!

What’s particularly disturbing, his supporters were actually going turn a blind eye to Kelly’s military fairytales and allow him to escort Hockey’s Memorial Cup, a trophy that is dedicated to all Canadian Armed Forces members who gave their lives in the service of our great country.

*The bottom line*

PRIVATE Robert Kelly had legitimate military service during the Cold War, that’s something in which he should have taken great pride. He had no need to embellish his time in the Army but, by doing so, he stood in the blood of our brothers and sisters who paid the ultimate price for our freedom during the period 1947-1991!

Regardless, all of our research will provided to law enforcement agencies which would have jurisdiction(s) in the area in which the alleged violation of s419 CCC may have occurred. Additionally, we will provide them with the contact information for the Library and Archives – Canada and the CF’s Directorate of Honours and Recognition so, they can make a formal request for relevant documents, should they so desire to further investigate Mister Kelly’s bogus military narrative.

Category: Phony soldiers

Comments (66)

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  1. Reaperman says:

    I remember him well–from back in our ‘Sky Trooper’ days. There we were, fighting back to back on Kashyyyk, when order 66 came in. Orders are orders, but Yoda didn’t see it our way, and promptly flipped right the fuck out. Between the separatist droid army, these hairy bigfoot things, and that enraged force-Muppet, it’s a wonder any of us made it out alive.

    • Hayabusa says:

      All this Clone War stuff was before my time. But let me tell you about my exploits during the Battle of Hoth. There I was, there I was…

      • Some Guy says:

        Hoth? I had an uncle who was there. Unfortunately he became one with the force when an AT-AT hit his A-Wing. His asshole co-pilot managed to crash-land the bird, but left him to die when the AT-AT stomped the wreck just moments later. That cowardly bastard better hope I never run into him, I tell ya what!

    • A Proud Infidel®™ says:

      I think we had him along with us during our seekrit missions in the jungles of Paprika as well…

  2. 26Limabeans says:

    I like his girlfriend.

  3. Graybeard says:

    PRIVATE Robert “Bob” Kelly – proof that Florida doesn’t have all the idiots.

    • Mick says:

      But does he have a motorcycle and a leather vest?

      • Rob says:

        you obviously didn’t serve a day as your snide little comment ” but does she have a motorcycle and leather vest ” implies that you are not fond of Veterans organizations that ride motorcycles and the good that they do for each other and the community. You my civilian friend are an idiot

        • Cris says:

          I’ve been riding since before I served and I poke fun at these riders’ clubs. As I’ve said in the past, what’s with the vest and beret?
          Bought my 1st HD at 18 back in ’79 and have never worn a leather vest or belonged to a club. Now, someone wants to join and wear the patch and all the bling, more power to them, but maybe the Corps’ philosophy on uniforms, the less the better, has been ingrained in me.

        • Graybeard says:

          Rob, I believe you misunderstand Mick here. Dude, you need to get your sarcasm meter fixed, it ain’t working.

          What Mick was referring to was the propensity for posers to join motorcycle clubs and wear leather vests in propagating their lies.

          Why, just a day or two ago we had a poser who started a local branch of a veterans’ motorcycle club show up here.

          Go pop a PBR and chill, dude.

        • Skidmark says:

          Rob, were you having a bad day yesterday? I hope today is better for you. As Graybeard said…

    • Old Trooper says:

      No, no, no; that’s General Robert “Iron Guts” Kelly………………………I’m just sayin’

  4. Dennis - not chevy says:

    Whyzzit these types never post any pictures of times when they were, say a Master-Corporal or on KP or just out of basic training with an ear to ear grin with more teeth than sense? It’s always pictures showing medals, stripes, and ribbons galore. Is there some sort of fertility medicine which allows a woman to give birth to a Sergeant?

  5. JimV says:


  6. thebesig says:

    History and Mathematics strikes phonies’ claims all over the world. :mrgreen:

  7. RGR 4-78 says:

    “He also says that he met the Queen in Picadilly Circus”

    Maybe he meant he met a drag queen in Picadilly Circus.

  8. Sgt Fon says:

    Those Crazy Canadians!!!

  9. mikeninercharlie says:

    “Kelly was also honoured by having three of his original country songs — The Death of Mother Maybelle Carter, Country Hall of Fame and Don’t Let Tradition Die — inducted into the Country Music Hall of Fame. The day after the Memorial Cup Parade in Windsor, Kelly will pay a four-day visit to Dollywood in Tennessee.”
    Southpoint Sun, Leamington, Ontario 17 Nay 2017

    Maybe he can write song about losing his dog, pick up, bogus medals, honour, integrity and his maroon beret!

    • EchoAlpha says:

      Ironically neither the Canadian Country Music Hall of Fame or ANYWHERE ELSE has heard of this wannabe Nashville Cat!

      • Guard Bum says:

        There are thirteen hundred and fifty two guitar pickers in Nashville and this faker isnt one of them!

    • yikesalright says:

      I heard him play and sing he sounds like a cat on a tin roof, and if you throw in his partner Shirley Affleck they sound like 2 cats on a tin roof…and the County is hurting

  10. Jeffery Damon Monroe says:

    Damn I thought The Lord Field Marshall Montgomery was dead? This is one Super Trooper Airborne Canadian – Umm how many of those medals did he get by getting into a Hockey fight or run over by those evil Elk and their Superior Commanders The Grizzly Bear and His commander-in-Chief Mr Moose?

  11. The Old Maj says:

    The answer is staring us in the face. He was in the Salvation Army doing all those heroic things.

  12. Skippy says:

    Well at lest SV is not just a American problem
    They have the same turds north of the border too

  13. Carlton G. Long says:

    I’m surprised he hasn’t claimed to be the “real Major Crowne” (or at least the “real Corporal Peacock”) .

  14. chooee lee says:

    Just so you know it was really me who said “DAMN!!! the torpedoes full speed ahead” . This was when I was with Admiral Dewey in the PI back in nineteen dikkity two.

    • The Old Maj says:

      I served with Nelson at Trafalgar. It was my idea to split the fleet in to two columns. Nelson died taking a bullet for me. He said I was more essential to the war effort than he was.

      • RCAF_Chairborne says:

        Pfft… I served at Rorke’s Drift; where the belt-fed steam-powered Martini MG I hand crafted on the spot, saved the day and won me the VC and Intergalactic Service Medal.

  15. Mark Lauer says:

    I have genuine sorrow for the people around these posers to defend them against what they perceive as “unwarranted attacks against a hero”. They want to believe their chosen Knight in Shining Armour is not tarnished.
    It’s a devastating blow to find out that Sir Galahad is really just a sad clown inside all the finery.

  16. A Proud Infidel®™ says:

    What a wanker. Hey Robert Kelly, TAKE OFF, HOSER!!

  17. Jeff LPH 3, 63-66 says:

    Gad Zooks. I see he was counting coup By the picture of him holding the 8 feathers of which he earned by scalping 8 indians after running out of ammo with his M 1 Garand or Lee Enfield at the battle of the Little Big Horn in 1876. He was the only one to escape from Gen. Custers 7th Cav. battle by jumping through a time portal.

  18. RCAF_Chairborne says:

    An elderly fellow-canuck phony.
    I am assuming he is trying to say he is from the Waanabee First Nation with that mish mash of sticks and animal parts.

    • 11B-Mailclerk says:

      Mock-taw nation

    • EchoAlpha says:

      That mishmash as you call it is an Eagle Staff given to warriors to bear which this lying fuck is not one of, a real bearer must have a strong moral fibre, a pure heart and live a pure honest life.

    • Willie says:

      He’s no Code Talker that’s for sure unless you consider “dah um dah oh dah de dah” this jerk off lets his better half Moo Moo Affleck do his talking for him…

  19. USMCMSgt (Ret) says:

    It’s possible he served during WWII even if he was born in 1936. It goes like this.

    Here’s a little story Robert Kelly likes to tell, and if you’ve never heard it’s just as well…

    He was talking to his father on his death bed, and with a smile on his face this is what he said:

    “Now the day Robert came out of his mother’s womb, Robert found himself in the delivery room.

    All bloody and wet he repelled to the floor, cut his umbilical cord and crawled through the door.

    He had camouflage diapers and black baby shoes… a butter knife sword and baby dress blues.

    He wore three safety pins on his shoulder for rank, and had a jeep stroller and a tricycle tank.

    He showered up and dressed then marched through the ward – saluted all the nurses with his little pretend sword.

    At that moment he heard all the other babies crying like heck, so he rushed right in and yelled “”Attention on deck!!!””

    When they said “Yes, SIR!” he knew he had it made, because he had orders to Germany as a member of the Royal Canadian Parachute Brigade”.

  20. 1 RCR says:

    He is not a Knight in shinning armor. He’s just a retart wrapped in tin foil.

    • Signals Pete says:

      Sad, it took me a 2 second look at the Maroon Beret and Jacket he’s wearing without having any Jump wings to spot this fake. My father was Canadian Airborne and I served in the Army years later. This stuff drives me nuts, especially with the BS stories.

  21. willie says:

    Poor Robert Kelly, he’s no GI Joe or Geronimo, he’s no John Wayne or Little Jimmy Dee he’ll always be just a PHONY TO ME!!!!

  22. web says:

    I saw Kelly and his wife 2years ago at the memorial in the town of Essex they were having some presentation or what have you?? Later that day I decided to check and look at the wall of names of soldiers who served flew or worked on spitfire planes sure enough “Robert Kelly” name was on the wall …is it him the same PHONY or another Robert Kelly? not sure I believe in my heart it is the Phony at work again…

  23. slimpickin says:

    My uncle was killed in World War 2 very young brave soldier…he died for all of us…and We have to look at this LOSER ROBERT KELLY in the news paper’s and on tv doing all he can to portray that he is some kind of hero…Well he’s not he’s little more than sick individual… a complete PHONY…his embellishments are much more than that…they are flat out lies untruths that have been upheld by the likes of his so called wife Shirley Affleck and a number other Veteran’s to weary, frightened to speak up about his so called Military Career…he should not be allowed to wear those Medals or Speak on Behalf of Real Soldiers like my uncle and brother’s and sister’s father’s mother’s that have fallen defending Our Great Country…I ask everyone to jump in say what you feel about this PHONY..CONTACT VETERANS AFFAIRS, AND ALL ORGANIZATIONS THAT ARE APPROPRIATE THANKS

  24. noend says:

    The Historical Society of Windsor/Memories Project if they in fact had anything whatsoever to back of the claims of Robert Kelly why than wouldn’t they do so? Rather than threaten SV-C with a lawsuit how about owning up to their part in portraying or at least pushing Robert Kelly into the mess he now finds himself in?… mind you all Robert Kelly is not a 3 to 6 year old child he knows right from wrong.

  25. armyplus says:

    Robert Kelly & Shirley Affleck don’t live in Leamington, Ontario they live in “Staples,Ontario”, and it’s my understanding that Kelly the Phony not only is he not returning calls he’s not out, and about doing his usual Phony Stuff…I hope it continues…I trust the Veterans in the Area, and all who support Real Soldiers, Real Veterans remain tough, and not allow the likes of Robert Kelly the Canadian Phony to parade around in his so called uniform more like deformed-uniform with his fake medals

  26. noend says:

    I believe Robert Kelly shouldn’t be allowed to have a poppy on is license plate, and he shouldn’t be allowed to a have a disability sticker to place in his window, he has claimed so many different reasons for having a bad leg like falling off a tank, and tripping over his own big feet…I heard many years ago he got into a car accident in NB and that is how he hurt his leg…he can’t hardly see, he can’t hear, and apparently he can’t tell the truth…

  27. GlenM says:

    A lot of people are making jokes about this but I will not. What this man is doing and claiming to be is disgraceful. So many lies, u inform variations, medals and badges that magically change with the seasons. He should be ashamed and is a disgrace to all of us who serve and to those who legitimately earned medals and jump wings. Enough talk, action needs to be taken by lawful authorities.

  28. GlenM says:

    A lot of people are making jokes about this but I will not. What this man is doing and claiming to be is disgraceful. So many lies, uniform variations, medals and badges that magically change with the seasons. He should be ashamed and is a disgrace to all of us who serve and to those who legitimately earned medals and jump wings. Enough talk, action needs to be taken by lawful authorities.

  29. Patrick Coppinger says:

    I will have two municiple members of the Town of Leamington in my class this coming wee. This story will a slide show 0800

  30. Doug Kemp says:

    Why is this dude wearing 2 Commissionaires long service medals (CLSM)? You only get issued one after 12 years, and a clasp to attach to it every 5 years after that. This guy is wearing a CLSM with clasp, and a CLSM without clasp beneath it. Unbelievable.

  31. Willie B says:

    This is for Stolen Valour Canada…thanks for doing what you do…Can you tell us all what has become of the information that you obtained, and passed along to the proper authorities? Is Veteran Affairs going to do anything about this Canadian Phony Robert Joseph Kelly? “Something needs to be done if not then it’s a real sad shame”

  32. jj williams says:

    Don’t know how the Veterans themselves can stand for this phony Robert Kelly… what needs to happen is this guy should lose his benefits if he receives any from the Canadian Government/Veterans Affairs what have you…he should not be allowed to have a poppy on his vehicle plate…and someone should make certain he turns over the fake medals…the beret, and his blazer all of which are part of his fraudulent behaviour…end of story….Veterans need to take it to Veterans Affairs and their MP,s MPP,s Mayor’s of Windsor, and Essex, and Leamington

  33. John D says:

    Robert Kelly his native name is “snowbird” what a joke …more like dumb dumb bird…this guy is a disgrace to all Veterans, and disgusting to not only real Veterans but their families and families of those who have lost son’s daughters, brothers, sisters, mother’s and fathers and All Canadians should be pissssssss….

  34. sickandtired says:

    With all the information that has come to light regarding this phony Kelly I must say his partner/girlfriend or wife has lived with the man for going on 30 years surely she must of known what he was doing was not right and flat out wrong…she use to work in a bank, and she worked with numbers she could add, and multiply she had to have done the math and realized he couldn’t have been in WW2, and yet she managed to speak for him at numerous functions, she read his poems and she was in the News along with Kelly, she also got all the free meals etc.etc….

  35. realityman says:

    It’s very troubling to me to know that what Kelly has done has not persuaded all the Veterans to stand up and demand that something be done like perhaps take away his military benefits if any…I don’t understand how some Veterans even those that know him personally can stand by and say absolutely nothing whatsoever to him or his about what they have done…I guess it’s up to the rest of US to stand up to Kelly and those that stand behind his kind…

  36. taresmeup says:

    clearly something needs to be done about this Kelly guy, and even his partner Shirley Affleck, and any others who stand by him and is work… clearly Affleck must have known what he was doing was wrong, and really so did a lot of veterans…it’s more than frustrating …why support veterans and other organizations if they are going to continue to allow Kelly and others to get away with doing what they do

  37. sickandtired says:

    In a veterans day magazine for 2018 on a number of pages they have pictures of Robert Kelly the canadian phony it’s not very good, and were asked to support our Veterans…my loved one served in WW2 and was killed now he’s a real soldier unlike Kelly and the Historical Society/Veterans Memories Project should be ashamed….

  38. citzen says:

    Is Stolen Valor Canada going to do anything? or have they done anything regarding the Windsor Historical Society and it’s President Dan Bouzide and his publishing pictures, and stories of Kelly and his lies in the Veterans Magazine of 2018?