New Pentagon rule bans ‘offensive jokes’ and harassing behavior.

| February 10, 2018 | 110 Comments


Military Times reports on Thursday the Pentagon released Department of Defense Instruction 1020.03, “Harassment Prevention and Response in the Armed Forces.” The new instruction establishes guidance to the services’ to prevent all types of harassment, ranging from offensive jokes to sexual harassment.

Defense Secretary Jim Mattis, known for his own use of colorful language to inspire the troops, said a new Pentagon policy targeting offensive language and behavior should not be interpreted as a draconian end to military camaraderie.

“You have to adapt to your times,” Mattis said. “There’s a rough, good humor among soldiers. We all know that. But I have never seen rough good humor countenance or in any way frame something that’s disgusting, repellent or something like that.”

According to the instruction, “harassment may include offensive jokes, epithets, ridicule or mockery, insults or put-downs,” as well as physical threats or racially-tinged interactions that “creates an intimidating, hostile, or offensive environment.”

I’m of a mixed mind about this. One person’s harassment is another’s vivid learning experience. Times change- I get that- and we all can agree there is no place in the military for sexual harassment. But I can see this becoming a sop for some puppy’s hurt feelings when receiving some well-deserved stick-and-rudder from a superior. Thoughts?

Category: Military issues, Politics

Comments (110)

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  1. Sapper3307 says:

    A rabie a bishop and the pope are on a ship and it starts to sink, the caption commands to “abandon ship, women and children first”.

  2. 26Limabeans says:

    Reminds me of the period shortly after my AD where Drill Instructers were banned from swearing at trainees in derogatory terms.
    I doubt it actually abated but there it was for all to see….The pussification of the Army. Now we need butt hurt safe spaces.

    • Tallywhagger says:

      When out Sr. DI went off on his colorful tirades I couldn’t help but laugh, which got other trainees laughing. He must have had a sense of humor because he started laughing too. Then he dropped us all for 50. That did nothing for my popularity, but I did learn new ways to conjugate vulgar terms in improbable syntax.

    • Mason says:

      I remember getting brief by the TI (USAF guy here) about the harassment and abuse policies. I might not remember it perfectly, but as I recall he said, “And I an not supposed to f—ing swear at you s—heads, but we’re all adults, so I’ll f—ing swear if I want. Anyone have a problem with that?” To which we did not.

      I learned quite a bit of colorful swearing thereafter in my times in.

    • David says:

      Had the opposite experience – first day of Basic, SSG Zambuto lined us all up asshole to navel and chewed us out for 45 solid minutes. Discussed our ancestry, personal habits, lack of masculine equipment, inabilities, and failings in excruciating detail – and never used as much as a ‘damn’. I was awestruck. Brilliant invective.

    • desert says:

      So much for “freedom of speech”! As for sexual harassment, I worked around some female types while in the Navy, never occurred to me to say anything to them off color….but then I was raised to respect women….damned hard to do now that they have turned their souls over to satan! Women used to be held in HIGH RESPECT, they wanted equality…ok, you got it, now STFU! imho

  3. OldCorpsTanker72 says:

    Happens every time. He’s only been in DC a few months, and already Mad Dog is becoming Angry Pup. And, yes, if he’d like to have a face-to-face about this comment, I’m OK with that.

  4. OWB says:

    This could easily cause more problems than it solves. For those looking to be offended, they never have to look very far. Will they now have official permission to grumble even more? I dunno, but it looks like it.

    Shouldn’t we be more concerned with things like assault and such? Saying something someone somewhere might define as objectionable is impossible to define much less enforce. Physical attention that is unwanted is something else.

    • Hondo says:

      Have to disagree in part, OWB. This new reg WILL be enforced. It just often won’t be enforced fairly, consistently, or while using common sense.

      I also don’t understand why the Article 138 right to bring complaints against superiors wasn’t sufficient. If I recall correctly, the UCMJ and/or service regulations already prohibit maltreatment of subordinates. Seems to me that racial epithets and/or truly offensive diatribes directed towards subordinates would fall under the category of maltreatment. (IMO if you don’t have enough backbone to tell a peer or subordinate to “knock off the offensive crap” when their offensive language or behavior is way out of line, you probably aren’t psychologically suited for the military and probably shouldn’t be in uniform.)

      I’m thinking we just may see an example or two (or more) of the law of unintended consequences in action before this gets sorted out.

      • Jus Bill says:

        The reason why the Article 138 right isn’t sufficient is that an OSD consultant needed a job, so his COR had them write up a new directive. More time and money is wasted; another silly reg is born.

      • OWB says:

        Really? You DISAGREE with ME????? I am soooo offended…

        OK, that was difficult to even type!

        Seriously, yes, Hondo, that is precisely the problem with trying to quantify the subjective. Until they start issuing mind reading kits no one can consistently guess what might offend everyone with whom they must interact.

      • Old Trooper says:

        We’re supposed to be fucking war fighters! If you get your little feelings all ate up because someone said something you disagree with; how the fuck are you going to face an enemy that thinks nothing of how butthurt you are about your fucking sparkle pony skittle farting unicorn feelings ya gawdam no load pus nuts candyassed little bitch!

  5. 2/17 Air Cav says:

    Two guys pissing from a bridge, one black, the other white.

    White guy: “Damn. The water is cold.”

    Black guy: “Deep too.”

  6. Mick says:

    Anyone who is going to get their precious, perfumed panties bound up into a knot and become incapacitated if they’re exposed to “offensive jokes, epithets, ridicule or mockery, insults or put-downs” had better not go anywhere near a Fleet Marine Force squadron or battalion.

    And the last time that I checked, combat was still a very “intimidating, hostile, and offensive environment”.

  7. MCPO NYC USN Ret. says:

    A transgendered Mormon, freckled faced, black skinned, red-headed, double amputtee midget, with an South Pacific Islander accent and lisp, wearing a Washington Red Skins football jersey and a sombrero walks into a drug store and asks …

  8. 2/17 Air Cav says:

    A rule against ridicule or mockery? Is there a BCT exception to this prohibition? Admittedly, my basic was long ago but if it wasn’t for ridicule and mockery, the drill sergeants would have had very little to say. Hell, mail call alone and their calling out names was an exercise in butchery. If your name wasn’t Smith, Brown, or Jones, it was anone’s guess whose name was being called.

  9. Bernie Hackett says:

    REMFs gotta REMF. Or as this Brit once said, “It gives certain people something to focus their rather limited abilities on.” Oh, and it looks good to the idiocracy, and makes them feel good. So there!
    Let’s keep moving them deck chairs around on the ol’ RMS Titanic.

  10. Jus Bill says:

    So how does this square with: “First-unit-of-assignment leaders want Initial Entry Training to deliver disciplined, physically-fit new soldiers who are willing to learn, they are mentally tough, professional and are proud to serve in the United States Army”?

    Dance lessons and puppies at basic maybe?

    • A Proud Infidel®™ says:

      Don’t forget coloring books and safe spaces as well.

    • Ex-PH2 says:

      Try reading that article before you say something.

      “”What leaders have observed in general is they believe that there is too much of a sense of entitlement, questioning of lawful orders, not listening to instruction, too much of a buddy mentality with NCOs and officers and a lot of tardiness being late to formation and duties,” Frost said. “These are trends that they see as increasing that they think are part of the discipline aspect that is missing and that they would like to see in the trainees that become soldiers that come to them as their first unit of assignment.””

      It says MORE discipline needed, end the entitlement crap.


    This is what happens when you jerk your knee faster than your cock.


    Whatever you do…….do not follow the Canadian example on Sexual Harassment.

    The “war” on SH was hilariously named OP Honour, which sounds exactly like ‘Hop on ‘er’ when spoken with a French-Can accent. Our Pubic Affairs Ociffers are required to be bilingual, so most are Franco.

    • Tony180A says:

      Do you know if the Canadian Army still gets rum and rye with field rations or did the pc police do away with that too.

      • RCAF-CHAIRBORNE says:

        Unfortunately, that tradition went the same way as the FAL/L1A1.
        Although, I have heard that some of the remaining ‘Old Guard’ still treat their troops to a tot here and there.
        NOTE: This does NOT refer to the same type of ‘tot’ that ANA Officers and NCO’s would hand out to their men!!!! 😲

        • Tony180A says:

          Damnit nothing is sacred. My ODA did some training early 90’s in Wainwright with some Canadian counterparts and I was amazed at the rum and rye included in the meal. The Canadian soldiers were restricted to the base because those rowdy bastards would literally destroy the little town off base. We had a Canadian LNO who showed us the finer parts of the town off base. Particularly impressed when he put a loonie in his teeth and inserted it into the “peelers” vagina.

    • Dennis - not chevy says:

      I still get a giggle remembering my very pregnant 8th grade teacher instructing us on the use of “bonne heure”.

  13. MSG Eric says:

    So, something that was already a violation of regulations and the UCMJ, is going to be a violation of regulations and the UCMJ?

    Seems more like a “do something!” response than anything. I hearken back to the days of “don’t ask, don’t tell” which didn’t really do anything that was already established except prevent recruiters from asking “are you a peter puffer or a carpet muncher?”

  14. rgr769 says:

    Next, they will bring back the stress card. Will the military start creating “safe spaces” where our troops feeling “unsafe” can have some play-dough and pet a puppy? Of course, the mean NCO will have to be counseled or could get an Article 15.

  15. A Proud Infidel®™ says:

    I wonder how quickly this will be misused and exploited by perpetually offended butt-hurt booger-eating thumb sucking snowflakes?

  16. Roh-Dog says:

    What IS the point of being in the military now that this abortion is a thing?
    Life is hard, and all things fair, life should be harder if you are stupid, ergo ‘harassment’ in the military.
    And if those feelings get hurt, there has always been an open door policy OR you could have taken it as a life lesson to not be a giant, leaky, sore puss-puss.

  17. Sparks says:

    Name calling, foul language, insults, crude cadence calls, jokes about one’s heritage and parentage were the order of the day when I hit boot camp and did not cease until graduation day if you fucked up. We survived and were good soldiers. No one was offended because we were all equally offended. Whatever happened, happened fairly. If one recruit seemed overly singled out, he usually had his head on backwards. As I said we all survived and were proud to graduate.

    But as someone stated the other day, that genie will never go back in the bottle and we will continue to coddle recruits until there is little difference between basic recruit training and frat house hazing.

    Our purpose in boot camp is to build soldiers, not socially aware individuals. We do not want individuals, we want a team, with a team’s mentality toward mission and each member. Telling first one and then the other they are special, unique or otherwise standouts, except for exemplary service to all, is to make a platoon of individuals and in my mind that is a bad concept. It is said we rely too heavily on the elite forces these days. But the basic discipline and hardness I acquired in boot camp are apparently now only driven home once you enter advanced training such as Rangers, Special Forces, etc. Or so it seems from new reforms such as these.

    It’s a different military for sure.

  18. CW2 Club Manager, USA ret. says:

    Let’s see if I understand the new rules. No more Yo Momma jokes, no more describing the female and transgender of a particular proud service as BAM’s, no more DI’s telling a formation of female and transgender recruits, When I command “attention” I want to hear (enter a number) of pussy’s sucking air. Shit, what has the military become?

  19. Perry Gaskill says:

    I’m going to swim against the current on this one. Everybody seems to be assuming the new DoD reg relates strictly to the behavior of superiors to those under them. Drill Sergeants to Trainees, for example.

    But if you read the section quoted in the Army Times, it could just as easily apply to peer-to-peer relationships within units. For example one Private mocking another Private for being fat, ugly, and stupid.

    What’s also curious is that Mattis’ directive seems to come at a time when the whole harassment frenzy has reached an apparent peak. If you follow what’s been going on lately, there are signs the pendulum is moving back the other way. The term “harassment” itself can be subjective to the extent that even a clue-free news media can now recognize the potential for a lot of false positives.

    • 2/17 Air Cav says:

      No, I didn’t assume that the directive applied up to down. I thought it applied across the board. Your example of one PVT calling another PVT fat, ugly, or stupid is okay with me. It’s schoolyard bullshit and one either returns the insults or fattens the lip of the offender. This complaint business is what I find objectionable.

    • rgr769 says:

      Gee, I guess the present day version of 1SGT Brinker calling Ranger students shitbags, ragbags, and dummies will be verboten. Prediction: there will be an epidemic of raging cases of butt-hurt arising in the ranks, rather than recruits taking a little verbal abuse like an adult.

    • OldSoldier54 says:

      “For example one Private mocking another Private for being fat, ugly, and stupid.”

      AKA peer pressure, which can be very effective.

  20. Bill R. says:

    I was Air Force so that is my point of view. We were merciless to each other on the flight line launch trucks. Quite often someone’s boneheaded stunt is what got them their nicknames. You never showed weakness and sensitivity because the guys would ride you bad. You had to have a thick skin to make it out there in the maintenance world. I would hate to see this come to an end. It is part of the life and helps you get through the long hours in shitty weather while keeping your sanity.

  21. Ex-PH2 says:

    So that means no more of this kind of thing, huh? Boring!

  22. OldManchu says:

    Had a Vietnam combat vet 1st Sgt at my unit. Had a young Laotian private in my platoon. The top used to consistently give him shit asking if he was a spy, telling him he “smelled like the VC” and all kinds of other funny shit! We all loved it including the private. He would sound off “I Laotian First Sergeant! We hate the fucking VC!”

  23. FatCircles0311 says:

    What ever happened to suck it the fuck up? The left has destroyed comedy already now they are after personal jokes in the military. Maybe this is a Mattis ploy to bait snowflakes can he can personally tell them to fuck off?

    I can only imagine my old 1st sgt briefing the company “if any of you motherfuckers get offended my door is open”. That would be the end of that.

    • 11B-Mailclerk says:

      If any of you (bleeeep) are offended, my door is open. I can abuse you (bleeeeeep) lots more anytime you like.

      I think that was the complete quote…

    • NR Pax says:

      I remember the Gunny in our Armory giving us a class. He started with this:

      “You may notice that my language is a bit crude. If you are the kind who is offended by such things, I don’t give a fuck. Furthermore, if I’m looking at you as if I just fucked your sister, I probably did.”

    • Airdale (AW) USN ret. says:

      Its only the left? Right, they don’t have that much power. And you think it was ok to personally joke someone too? I came in the Navy in the 80’s and never did all that BS name calling shit you talking about, unless you want to stand on the old mans carpet.

  24. timactual says:

    “harassment may include offensive jokes, epithets, ridicule or mockery, insults or put-downs,”

    I hate to mention it, but civilian life can be like this too. I must confess that this so-called “harassment” is standard fare in the crowd I usually hang with. Not to mention the four letter words.

    Perhaps those folks should go have a beer somewhere without a maitre d’ to learn how us working folks live.

    There is one phrase I learned in the Army that I am particularly fond of, and it applies to the gentlefolk who came up with this policy; “Fuck you if you can’t take a joke”.

    That is, I believe, the first time I have used such a vulgarity here, but I think it appropriate.

  25. Rosalee Adams says:

    “I just be part of the pansy brigade now. If my poor feelings are hurt and I might cry, but I can now demand adherence to DOD 1020.03.”
    Does this also include DIs at boot camp? Some boots might find that ‘offensive’ too.
    Finally, who defines what is offensive?
    Sounds more like Barry and that stooge who was his SecDef than the present administration.

  26. Reddevil says:

    When I was a Company Commander, my 1SG, fresh from 2/75, called every Soldier ‘cum drop’.

    He also had a standing rule that on their first day in the Company, every new Soldier would draw all their gear, meet their entire chain of command up through me, get a tour of the area (there’s the chow hall, ther’s the PX), and sleep in their permanently assigned room (by the way, their linen was drawn and their bed made for them to set the standard). In other words, the Soldiers knew that Top had their back no matter what. He tolerat d absolutely no hazing or anything g remotely close to it.

    This might turn out to be a good thing.

    I got it, troops need to have a thick skin,, but thereis a fine, difficult to define line between barracks humor and hazing. We all know it when we see it, but young troops don’t. Once it becomes hazing it is a cancer and can absolutely destroy a unit as well as the careers of the leaders.

    I’ve been around units that had hazing problems and it is a real problem that starts with jokes that are a little over the line. It progresses quickly from there to physical hazing and abuse. All the stories about guys being hung out a window by 550 cord, 100mph taped to poles, locked in wall lockers for days, pushed down stairs, etc, really happen, and of course it’s all fun and games until someone gets killed.

    The weird thing is that a lot of it is sexual and male on male. Read about the USMC Silent Drill Team in the ’90s for a classic example.

    On the flip side, that kind of behavior doesn’t do anything to enhance readiness- tough, realistic, mission focused training is FAR better than yelling or screaming for enhancing discipline. That said, troops expect a certain amount of it when they go to Basic.

    • 11B-Mailclerk says:

      CSM Macintosh flat-out prohibited hazing, including sending new folks out for boxes of grid squares, etc. He said there was plenty of misery for training purposes without manufacturing it for its own sake.

      I was told that he threw tear gas into a formation of the battalion officers in the middle of doing a gas mask PT run, to catch the ones who cheated by removing the disk from the exit valve (forgot the nomenclature, M17 type). The masked formation run was apparently in response to officers having ordered gas mask PT for their men, in which officers were absent.

      He simply radiated leadership, competence, and trustworthiness.

      So, maybe the point is we need to focus more on purposeful training that sucks moosecock, and less on telling people they suck moosecock.

      Might work better with the current feedstock.

      • 26Limabeans says:

        Our DI popped a tear gas canister while on a march through the woods. I shut my eyes, dropped my weapon and ran into a tree. Best damn training ever.

        • Green Thumb says:


          I have had my balls smoked on many occasions.

          There is a fine line, but I am a fan of physical discipline. It sends a message.

        • Green Thumb says:


          I have had my balls smoked on many occasions.

          There is a fine line, but I am a fan of physical discipline. It sends a message.

          • A Proud Infidel®™ says:

            I had my ass smoked raw a few times by NCOs who wanted to teach me a lesson sans the paper trail left by today’s methods and it worked on me and many another meat head that needed to be corrected, the Old School method does work like it’s supposed to when it doesn’t get abused by someone on a power trip.

        • rgr769 says:

          During our division Recondo course, one of the training NCO’s fired an M-79 CS grenade at me when I was in chest deep water off the beach. Needless to say, I didn’t see the humor in it, since CS on wet skin burns like hell. All the NCO’s thought it was a hilarious thing to do to the new C.O. At a reunion over 30 years later, MSG Beach admitted he was the shooter. Another NCO instructed a Huey pilot to dunk me in the bay when I was hanging on the end of a 100 foot rope in a Maguire rig. I guess I was being harassed under these new standards.

  27. Skippy says:

    Well this is a stupid fucking rule

    What the fuck are they thinking anyways

  28. Hack Stone says:

    While they are at it, can they also ban offensive odors? Hack had the misfortune of serving alongside hygienically challenged troops, to include a few senior Staff NCO’s. There were a few Marines that were entitled to Hazardous Duty Pay due to the lack of sanitation of their room mates.

    • Skippy says:

      Word on that one, spent two weeks in the field at graf in Germany and we had lost soul
      That had no idea what baby wipes were and the meaning of pack extra socks and underwear
      And blades because in the army your ass still shaves in the field,,,
      We had to hose his nasty smelly ass at the wash rack back at the barracks the SOB still didn’t want to bath 😡😡😡

    • timactual says:

      There was a guy in my platoon once who was so filthy his bunk stank. Someone poured moth balls all over his bunk. It was a definite improvement.

  29. Just An Old Dog says:

    Big Fucking deal. It’s nothing more than Article 134 reiterated.
    Something to shut the ass lord liberals up when they whine about how the Military is a sexist patriarchy.
    Marine Drill Instructors have been forbidden to curse at recruits or call them by anything but their last name, rank, recruit or billet since the first SOP was written in the 1950s.
    Its simple as shit. You don’t call a recruit a cock -juggling two left feet having fuckhead when anyone is around.

  30. RetiredDevilDoc8404 says:

    It used to be you could tell if your drill sgt liked you or not by how colorful the names he called your mother were… those days are looooooong time gone. All I’m gonna say is “Thank you God that I’m retired, and thank you for making me too broken to fix…” Don’t think I’d last very long in today’s PC military. Jerks, had to go and ruin a perfectly good thing with their political correctness. No matter how much sugar you coat a turd with, it’s still gonna taste like shit if you eat it.

  31. AW1Ed says:

    Perhaps I should have led off with this pic:

  32. lily says:

    I think this could make our military a lot more professional. This type of behavior that’s being banned aught to be banned because it creates a toxic work environment. People on power trips all because they got a little more rank need to be put in check. Even after they are forced to stop their overtly toxic behavior it doesn’t mean they’ll stop their covert toxic behavior. Now they’ll just have to find lots of ways legally to harass. Cussing, put downs, harassment of different sorts obviously don’t make better troops. This should have been done a century ago. It’s not “pussyfication”, it’s making our military more professional.

  33. MrFace says:

    Well, I’m fucked.

  34. ChipNASA says:

    Because I can,

    Tower of Insults®™
    (aka, “This Ain’t Hell” Thesaurus)
    MOPP LEVEL 4!!!
    TAKE COVER!!!!!
    The Ignorant NCO or Officer that came up with this fuckhole policy , ALLEGEDLY, but not confirmed or proven, but in some people’s opinion, works balls, tickles taint and tongue punches hobo’s crusty fart boxes all, I Guess, while being a syphilitic, turd-sucking feces factory, HOLY Baby Ape Shit Breath, Bitch-ass Fuckstick guzzler, pile infested, onion-eyed flapmouthed butt-bailiff, “Fowl” mouthed Chicken Fucking Chickenfucker, You flaccid piece of tofu, Simply a fart in life waiting to be fabreezed away, moral equivalent of pond scum, THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS A WALKING TURD, inflamed, “Towel boy” in a gay bath house, DILLY DILLY!!, Ambulatory verbal dissembling anus, gaping giant ass walking fungus shit nugget, Bag of seasoned dog shit, Cambodian cunt sauce, Anyone who ever loved you was wrong, Poopy Headed ball working asshole, JERK OFF !!, Soup Sandwich, you’re such a pussy, when you get a haircut they charge you for a bikini wax, suck a big diseased gorilla dick and open those ass cheeks for the bull elephant that has been eyeing your lying ass, Poster-child for abortion, This twat waffle is dumber than a bucket of goat piss, I pray thou shalt be pursued into the mountains by sex-mad baboons, O thou creature of the pit!, If you are married, The only thing your wife wants for Christmas is a folded flag, Dick Swallowing Jerk Wad Spooge Sampling cum gobbling parasitic infection bunghole tonguer, Klootviool, should be ass raped and tea-bagged, at the same time, by a Rabid Rhinoceros, you were the kid that had to sit alone at lunchtime, He’s more fucked up than a spotted Zebra, If this wasn’t so sad, it would be as funny as watching a monkey try to fuck a football, Anus tonguing shitslurping fuckwitted hemorrhoid munching dick lips wanktoaster, pud-knuckling pus-nuts, farting dive bubble cock gobbling Pigfucker, lientery steatorrhea, sperm burping, Sloshing bucket of Hippo Diarrhea, short strand DNA ‘tard, a bathroom selfie loser, fake “death stare” makes you look like a semen sucking cum vampire on his way to a flying J truck stop hobo ball sac buffet, Cuntosaurus Rex, You man meat munching, spunk bubble blowing butt sponge, slack jawed, banjo eyed, single strand DNA refugee from a blow job, not worthy to lick taint lint off my cats backside, dickwad that can’t make a good seal on Tupperware, Buttcrackiula, tit, You look like the product of an orgy at a family reunion. You’re funnier than a sock full of frogs and tougher than a jar of marshmallow crème, Sharmouta, hey douche bag, I bet your ass is jealous of the shit that comes out of your mouth, sniveling, codpiece licking toilet seat sniffer, as worthless as a Toyota airbag, lying bucket of Chihuahua shit, taintpimple, Pillow bitin pickle smoocher, meat-gazing walrus fart hamster queef that should have stayed a tittyfuck cumstain in the back seat of an AMC Pacer, Bowl of ass soup, Festering fuckwart on a sewer rat’s ass, You’re not the dumbest person on the planet, but you sure better hope he doesn’t die, needle dick bug fucker, wad of fungus on a pile of roach turd, Drongo, Satan even said about you, “Boy is this guy a DICK!, Sparklepony, Toilet weasel, pigshit fungus Connoisseur ,worthless, Vice Admiral of the Narrow Seas, Blows winos behind bus stops for a nickel and gives change, jejeongsin-iya?, whore-hopping fecal wart, Soppspiste Pitbulkukkforhud, stench-ridden, Some drink from the fountain of knowledge; you only gargled, shiftless, monkey-buggerer, petrified shit biscuit, More worthless than rubber lips on a woodpecker or tits on a boar hog, ignoble itching buttcrack, You’re the reason God created Irritable Bowel Syndrome, moldy bowl of ratshit, would wear Richard Simmons’ used jockstrap as a facemask, lickspittle, useless bag of monkey fuck, dickbutt, rectum circling colon goblin, Asshole casserole, Vafanculo, Nut hugger, People like you are the reason God doesn’t talk to us anymore, salad tosser, gonorrheatic urethral cliff diver, smeerlap, fud, rancid floor buffer wax spreader, both of your Grandmothers should have had an abortion, just in case, I’ve seen bigger wieners on a cocktail plate!, You look like something I’d draw with my left hand, Mayor Grundle Butter of Scrotumburg and Anusville, waste of oxygen, Grandstanding cunt, prickwrinkler, Holy cupcake munching monkeys, clitwart, cuntscab, anal sphincter canyon yodeling phallic squeezer, numbnuts, malodorous odiferous felonious fido fucker, snowball, Coprophagous fop, Gonorrhea breath, swizzle tits, giggling beerflecked canker blossom, how did you survive infancy, rectal rapee, GonnoSyphaHerpaClapAIDS Patient Zero monkey buggerer, ball-tickling & ball gargling bullshiat artist, R2-Dildo, You suck dick for beer money and you don’t even drink beer, secret squirrel masturbation specialist, hand in your badge, Adolf, you fart repeatedly just to make yourself smell better, spunk-trumpet, Bakrauf, face down ass up weak kneed pillow biter, wait of all the lucky sperms that came outta your daddy, you’re the one that WON?? Holy shit, maybe a “buggerer of little boys”, rottencrotched, rump wrangling, colostomy bag curator, culo de chongo, booger eating fuckbucket, Lemon Party-lusting, Pissflap, you’re as useful as Anne Frank’s Drum Set, overzealous polyp burglar, poser quim squirt, bed wetting, follows in Victorious Felder’s bovine excrement -filled boots, I wanna get a running start and drop kick him right in the ‘ol yogurt gun, Fustilarian, less popular than a Cheese and Veggie Omelet MRE, You are so full of shit, your ears stink, I hope your wife brings a date to your funeral, butt-pirate, as popular as an SBD fart in church on a packed house Sunday, you should get dorked in the squeakhole with the Barbed Cock of Satan, toadstool slime-inhaling dick-drizzling sludge, putrid barrel of fermenting manatee prostatic fluid, prodigious jenkem huffer, You’re a dirty coffee mug on a Monday morning filled to the brim with steaming frothy panther piss, Asparagus-dick, as fucked up as an opossum eating shit out of a hairbrush, Champion Jailhouse Baloney Pony Rider, You’re dumber than snake mittens, Wooden dildo, assplow, Piss Whistle, moron, Poodle Raper, cunt fart, Prevaricating orally diarrhetic sphincter mouth, lintlicker, Wino sphincter/ballsack coinesseur, Cock Bagel and Dick Doughnut, Stronzo, Pie-Faced Crotch Pheasant, Road apple, Mule muffins, Buffalo bagels, Beaver biscuits, pony pucks & Pigeon pellets (Shout out to M*A*S*H Col. Potter) , Straight Up Stupid Motherfucker, manpleaser, this buttmunch needs to eat out the rotten asshole of a road-killed skunk, baby unit, one eyed snake charmer, People like this make me wanna hatefuck a dumpster, on fire, Shit-Slot Cosmonaut, Proper Daft Cunt, Fair suck of the sav, is so unimaginably and extraordinarily vapid and mindlessly stupid that he could get lost in an elevator, Meretricious, you’ll never be the man your mother is, Odious Twonk, likes to suck the turds out of rabid dogs bungholes, baby cave, analconda, Grade A chode yodeler, tittilating scrotalator pole smoker, Vaginal Sand Fairy, Drollenpijper, wide open mouth pivot man in a circle jerk, feral abacus, leg humper, You look like you were conceived through anal, meadow muffin, ax wound drippings, you’re such a loser, when you spank your little wee-wee, your hand falls asleep, horse squeeze Ball Cheese, when I saw this sperm receptacle, soggy biscuit eater, my eyes rolled so hard I saw my own brain stem,

  35. ChipNASA says:

    Schlumpadinka, wazzock, Tampon Tunnel, used toilet paper-sniffing Turbo knob vacuum of a meat gazer, terminal crotch infection, asshat, roach turd-munching shit-for-brains, dick pickle, gòrach pìos de cac, It looks like he smeared super glue on his lip and chin and went down on Whoopi Goldberg’s cootchie, (This one is for the Ladies and Medical Staff) this prancing fairy is about as popular as a failed Episiotomy with a 4th degree perineal tear, wanker, herpes-ridden dung beetle target, feejackapeesack, first volunteer for being part of a jailhouse human centipede, bunghole warrior, cockwomble, bread loaf end slice, should eat a nice steaming pile of monkey shit you ass clown, looks like hammered dog shit, Your mother may have told you that you could be anything you wanted, but a douchebag wasn’t what she meant, If Mr. Rogers were alive, he’d piss on your grave, helmet wearing short bus riding window licker, Head paddler in the douche canoe, Uncle Fucker, more ate up than a chocolate dildo in a crowded gay bar, shitbag, dipstickus giganticus, Humpty Dumpty cleanup man after the fleet visits Naples, Herp-Burger, poofter, intergalactic cunt muffin, knob gobbling, fimicolous galactic Jackoff, Assistant Jizz mopper in training, chronic hemorrhoid, stugatz, inbred, toe-jam from an infected Filipino hooker that specializes in foot jobs, tortured turnip turd, Sea Donkey, festering pool of anal leakage, your penis lives in eternal darkness, I’d hate to see your toilet, retardus maximus, Microcephalic Toad Licker, can go suck a fat baby’s dick, steaming rat-felching bucket of moldy monkey fuck, Bellicose ball gnashing raper of babies with rabies, Pecker-puffing pickle licker, catcher not pitcher, bawbag, about as useful as a white crayon, Arschloch, impotent koekeloeren, slaptard, couldn’t even be trained in my AFSC in the USAF to suck farts out of C-5 seat cushions, mumpsimus, reverse dirty sanchez lover, scunner, kutomba wewe, Cryptosporidium-ridden tire tosser, fudgepacker, turbo douche & enema nozzle, mental midget, likes to molest small farm animals, dead and alive, is a hemorrhoid, 100 retarded monkeys could jerk off in a stagnant swamp and generate a better life form than you, You are about as useful as a knitted condom, schlong juice, cockalorum cum-guzzling gutter slut, Dalton Coldiron’s bunny-butt buddy atomic sphincter goblin, If you stuck your brain up a gnat’s ass, it would look like a BB in a boxcar, Jackanape, Fuck Tart, Sitzpinkler, lispian, pussytits, Milksop, You vacuous, toffee-nosed malodorous pervert, pillock, puss soaked jackwagon, waste of trace elements and water, Jizztissue, knob breath dick biscuit, Pettifogger, Bunghole Baby, donkey raping shit-eater, twatface, pedicabo ego vos et irrumabo it, may he lay a lip lock on the snotty end of a moose cock,butt munch, man of the night in a large animal bordello, I bet you’re the kind of guy that would fuck your own mother in the ass and not even have the goddamn common courtesy to give her a reach-around (Thanks R. Lee)
    You fucking LAND WALRUS, shit snorting stain on Hillary Clinton’s yeast infected kootchie covers, you’re lucky we don’t dress you up in drag, drop your ass off somewhere in the Middle East and let an entire battalion of ISIS soldiers and supporters butt rape you until you’re turned inside out, you stupid toilet mint licker, Ball Basting Boy Wondor, planetary level atomic flaming douchebag, Santorium, lying shitbag wanna-be fucknozzle cleaner, Rumpleforeskin, fuckstain skidmark on the underwear of life, anal bum cover (LOL SNL Jeopardy), taint cookie, Mr. Men’s Room Wide Stance toe tappingglory hole hero, Fartleberry, Some NCO Should have beat you within an inch of your life, insult to humanity, I hope his ego hits the floor like a turd from a tall cows ass, shit-filled meatsack, masturbates to videos of Jar-Jar Binks, YOU’RE THE REASON ALIENS COME TO EARTH IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT AND STICK THINGS UP OUR ASSES BECAUSE EVEN ADVANCED CIVILIZATIONS CAN’T FIGURE YOUR SHIT OUT, walking shart shooter, minge, moldy dingleberry on a roadkill swamp rat’s ass, test subject for Preparations A thru G, Remedy critch, Gnard gargling queefsquirt, stupid enough to try to sandpaper to a wildcat’s ass in a phone booth, Handgallop, twatscicle, Obamawad, tool, bint, sleezebag, weaksauce, Gobshite, fuck hole, Pillsbury Dough Bitch, Should NOT be around WOMEN OR CHILDREN, touches himself inappropriately, Turd-Burglar, rimjobber, turd lizard of a roadkill opossum-humper, cum-dumpster, Inbred buck-toothed slimy toadstool on a Swamp Donkey turd, Useless mangy crotch-dropping, Putz, rectal inspector, ferger, Sheep tits, gonad, queefer, chicken shit, choad, Puppy fucker, dopus, Blue Falcon and Blue Waffle, Fuck Apple with mold, twizzletits, tallywacker, Bozack, Fiction-flinging Gerbal Felcher, dingleberry circling ass buzzard, bitch, Saprophyte, ATM, pap smear, bukakke glazed shitmitten, Dandy prat, Tazmanian Dorkwad rat fucking, shit-sucking warthog’s asshole, gimp, bescumber, coccydynia, you lying sack of mosquito, Siberian and of cum-stained hadji sheep shit”, mangina micropeen, Fuckrag, Syphilitic Turd Burglar, possibly likes to pick his teeth with his OWN used catheters, Hircismus, cheat, pope-fondling, turbo apeshit crazy, Cacafuego, Cock-juggling *Pussy* thundercunt.
    We now include the NEW & IMPROVED
    /FREE with every deployment of an equal or greater value
    Tower of Insults®™.

    Can I get an AMEN?!
    (Or your choice of exclamation/interjection.)
    Here endeth the lesson.

  36. smoke-check says:

    Lars approves. And he’s better than you. Just ask him.

  37. E4 Mafia For Life. says:

    How in the fuck are they expected to communicate?
    There are over 437 uses for the word and variations of, “shit.”
    1238 uses for the word and variations “fuck.”
    And what about acronyms?
    No one mention this to R. Lee Ermey. This will put him in an early grave and we will lose a national treasure.

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