A Very Special Feel Good Story

| September 13, 2018

This was forwarded by Skippy. As a “feel good story”, I thought it deserved its own space.

Before you go any further, put down whatever beverages you are indulging in, get some kleenex to wipe the tears from your eyes. and if you easily become short of breath, be warned: this is not for the faint of heart to read.


A Las Vegas sociology professor is facing felony gun charges after he reportedly shot himself in the arm in protest of President Trump.

The Las Vegas Review-Journal reported on Tuesday that College of Southern Nevada sociology professor emeritus Mark J. Bird, age 63, was charged with the unlawful discharge of a firearm, carrying a concealed weapon without a permit and the possession a deadly weapon on school property for his role in an on-campus shooting last month.

In the bathroom after Bird had exited, campus police said they found a $100 bill that had been taped to a mirror in addition to a note reading: “For the janitor.” Campus police also reported finding a .22-caliber pistol on the bathroom floor and a spent shell casing.

There is a preliminary hearing for Bird scheduled in the Las Vegas Justice Court on Sept. 17.

The college’s lack of transparency seems to be bothering the president of the college’s faculty union. Well, I’d let it go. The professor is apparently distressed about Trump.

It’s a shame that while he was in the bathroom with a gun, he didn’t neuter himself.


Category: "Teh Stoopid", Darwin Awards

Comments (66)

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  1. JacktheJarhead says:

    If you are going to shoot yourself as a protest, do it big or go home! Come on, the arm, Really? Head, chest, genitals, femoral artery, not the arm. Pansy!

    I think this should be the new challenge! Yes, instead of Tide Pods or setting your face on fire, who can shoot themselves the best! Betcha that will clean up the gene pool really quick!

  2. OldManchu says:

    Well at least he isn’t in a position to influence and young minds… oh wait, never mind.

  3. 26Limabeans says:

    Guy flinched, pulled the muzzle off his chest (squeeze idiot, not pull).

    Surprised he didn’t aim at the mirror.

  4. Hondo says:

    Such extreme commitment to “the cause”!

    Yes, that’s satire. IMO all this was was a fairly painful example of grandstanding in search of attention. I say that because he shot himself in a part of the body that would almost guarantee his survival. (Though I guess it’s possible he was so clueless about firearms and how to use same that he had an “oopsie” while trying to off himself.)

    Well, you got your 15 minutes of fame, “Prof”. Hope you enjoy the jail time that goes with it. And I hope the Nevada courts make an example of your butt for violating one of your sacred “gun free zones” by bringing the weapon on campus.

  5. Doc Savage says:

    I support this guy and all like him….keep up the good work, and above all…Dont give up; if you didn’t get your message across the first time, keep at it until you get Trumps undivided attention.

    Or, you run out of extremities.

  6. NR Pax says:

    sociology professor

    Found the problem.

  7. Comm Center Rat says:

    I feel sorry for the janitor – $100 is not nearly enough compensation to clean the crime scene. I hope the professor’s ACLU card is a bloody mess too.

  8. M48DAT says:

    .22 should have been .223. That would make more of a statement IMHO.

  9. 2/17 Air Cav says:

    I like the story for two reasons. First, he has shown fellow Trump haters how to best protest him: shoot yourselves. Second, his little protest resulted in his physical harm, his arrest, the disruption of the classes he taught for want of an instructor, not to mention sudden police presence and the ambo rushing through the hallways, brought unwanted negative publicity to the school, and caused the administration there all sorts of problems. This is truly a feel-good story.

  10. 11B-Mailclerk says:

    (Stole this from Ace of Spades)

    “You should have gone for the head.”

  11. JimmyB says:

    Gas is cheap, should have bought 5 gallons and set himself on fire.

    • Ex-PH2 says:

      I’m concerned that some leftreds are just stupid enough to try that as a protest. I don’t think they quite have the cojones and dedication of the Buddhist monk who self-immolated in Saigon in the 1960s, but it would definitely make a statement.

      We’ve already had one nutball incinerate himself in Central Park in New York City, in full view of children, but that was over the arguments about climate change.

      I do not condone that kind of thing at all. But it will not surprise me if it happens.

    • Aysel says:

      ^^this, so much this, I was scrolling looking for this exact comment and I was not disappointed.

    • 11B-Mailclerk says:

      Fire? Nah…

      He is already a flaming asshole.

  12. Tallywhagger says:

    In Las Vegas? Surely the fool could have found someone who would do the deal for him for a $100. Evidently, shooting yourself, in the shitter, of a public school holds some meaning for the pathetic professor.

    • Bill M says:

      Well, he is full of a certain bodily byproduct, so at least his did it in a somewhat appropriate place. Just needs to work on proper injection site placement.

  13. Roh-Dog says:

    At least this professor didn’t aim/display a gun towards someone, potentially causing a death.

    I propose a TAH toast to that .22!

    • Fyrfighter says:

      Wow, that’s crazy! I sure hope the defense has that info / video. Completely changes what happened, not that the left will ever admit it. Also amazing how hypocritical the left is.. “guns are bad, AR’s are EVIL!!!! (unless we have them)…”.. proves what us on the gun rights side have been saying for decades…

    • Mason says:

      Not surprised this didn’t make the broader news stories. Totally changes the nature of the incident.

      • Roh-Dog says:

        Just to get 100% on the record, I don’t know the truth, it’s all theoretical.
        If Dixon is what I believe he is, he’ll make the blotter sooner or later.

  14. David says:

    Obviously took his suicide lessons from Bradley Manning. Better luck next time, both a ya!

  15. 5th/77thFA says:

    Too little, too late ie; shoulda used a 12 gauge! Probably has already reproduced offspring into the gene pool; has polluted generations of students to his way of thinking. One of the original attention whores? Maybe shoulda burned his draft card inside his wallet, while the wallet was in his pocket? Or went to and stayed in Canada?

  16. Claw says:

    The Whiz Wheel™® says this is an excellent opportunity to utilize the newest multiplier, so:

    Mark J. Bird (FBBSDC*) 31 x 11 = 341

    *Full Blown Bat-Scheiss Drooling Crazy (Hat Tip to Hondo)

  17. Jeff LPH 3, 63-66 says:

    WTF; this A-Hole is a liberal so what is he doing with a firearm and most likely he is an anti 2A jerk off.

  18. A Proud Infidel®™️ says:

    Mark J. Bird is obviously a Really Exceptional Trump Acceptance Resistance Disorder Operative, a RETARDO!

  19. AW1Ed says:

    .22? Not enough club. .357Mag would essentially remove his arm- now THAT’S dedication!

  20. NHSparky says:

    I blame the NRA for this.

    (do I really need a /sarc tag?)

  21. OWB says:

    Easy to see why the school is having trouble figuring out how to deal with this. Who are they to blame? How can they couch this for the best political effect? What additional “common sense gun control” rules can they institute?

    So many possibilites, but most of them require blaming the loon for acting loony and violating rules already in effect. So many failures.

    What they got here is the perfect example of what not to do, what doesn’t work at all, and why most of us cannot relate to the left.

  22. Skippy says:

    I’m still cleaning up after reading about dumbass’s miss
    Nothing amazes me anymore
    Another sign I’m getting old
    I’ll take it…

  23. Mason says:

    He’ll be suing the gun manufacturer in 5, 4, 3, 2…

  24. rgr769 says:

    He shoulda had more range time. If he had aimed that pistol at a body part that would do some good, we woulda had a better outcome. Then he could have given himself a much better solution to his TDS: A lead injection to his proggy mush container would have provided a final cure.

  25. Just a 44B says:

    Here’s another school shooting that’s going to be added to the list to push the agenda.

  26. UpNorth says:

    Ex, what’s you email address, if we need to submit Feel Good Stories to you? My email address is on file with TAH.

  27. Thunderstixx says:

    Four numbers that would help this clown get his point across much better…

    • Ex-PH2 says:

      I don’t think he really has the courage to off himself. If he did, he’d have splattered his tiny mind all over the floor of his living room.

      To do something that reprehensible at his place of employment is beyond belief. He should be fired by the university for misconduct.

  28. JTB says:

    I thought they always set themselves on Fire…Interesting…