ERIC LEE BURRIS, NOT A SEAL 

| April 11, 2019 | 101 Comments

Eric Burris is one of these guys we have been tracking for a long good while now.  Sometimes these posers and embellishers are worse than a crotch tick when they embed themselves into legit organizations.

The fine folks at militaryphony.com send us the case.

It is relevant and interesting to point out that Burris is a member of the UDT/SEAL Association. It is possible to be a Member of the Association if you were never a SEAL. Support personnel to the Teams can join as Associate Members and Children can be Legacy Members. There is also Sponsored Members for people who have supported the Association and its Charities. Only SEALs can be Regular Members.

We found this picture where he has labeled himself as SEAL Team Four. He was asked if he was at Four and he followed with “details sent”. A simple yes or no probably would of worked.

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That picture was so popular it actually made it onto an unofficial SEAL history page.

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As a member of the UDT/SEAL Association he goes to many events to discuss SEALs and their equipment. 37747559_10214913607107399_5696047754657136640_n

Capture

He also talks to the community about his service. Here is a claim from the Veterans Day Program he spoke at.  In the programs it claims that Burris completed Sniper School, on a Search and Rescue team and completed 16 years of service.

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EricB1

Here is the link for that.

.Veterans Day Program

We also found this.

EB2

Here is the link. If you click on his name in the link it goes straight to his LinkedIn account. On that account in his history its interesting to note that his civilian work would have overlapped 16 years of service.

Link

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Little Eric Burris seems to have been dancing the fence between fact and fiction.  Rod Serling once called this kind of guy, “A man, double parked in his own mind”.

Since we have had several requests for verification from both Law Enforcement and citizens – Military Phonies requested a check of the UDT/SEAL Database for Eric Burris. Military Phonies found no such person has ever graduated UDT/SEAL Training. His records were requested with a Freedom of Information Act Request.

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The first thing that jumps out at us is that Mr. Burris was in the United States Navy Reserve. He could not have gone to BUD/S as a reservist. It’s for Active Duty only.

His list of schools does not show BUD/S, Search and Rescue, or Sniper School. It shows Basic Aviation Training and AD A School. That would have been the Rate for Aviation Machinist Mate. Aviation Machinist’s Mates are United States Navy aircraft engine mechanics that inspect, adjust, test, repair, and overhaul aircraft engines and propellers. Not much call for snipers around jet engines.

There is also the fact that the records show 4 years of service and not 16.

The official military records do not support the claims.

The UDT/SEAL Association was made aware of this blog before it was published. There is no need to fill their mailbox with copies of the blog or calls to inform them of it.

Sadly, it appears that some members of his family might have been under the impression that Eric Burris was a Navy SEAL.  He did serve during a time when most people would not and had a perfectly honorable career that anyone should have been proud of.

However, Erick Burris was never a Navy SEAL.

I can not help but feel sorry for those who believed otherwise.

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Source: ERIC LEE BURRIS, NOT A SEAL | Military Phonies®

Category: Navy Poser, Phony SEAL, Valor Vultures

Comments (101)

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  1. USAF RET says:

    Rob Serling was genius. This douche, not so much. Talk about hiding in plain sight

  2. C2Show says:

    This dude even got his family brainwashed…shocker.

  3. Outcast says:

    Great two days and the brigade of S/V Navy Seals increase ranks by two bodies. Doing it up good with the rag on head and middle eastern type scarf around neck.

  4. 5th/77th FA says:

    Eric Lee Burris…Never a Navy SEAL, but is a bringer of shame upon himself and embarrassment to his family. Checked the comments over on MP, and one of his daughters defending him and his lies….Sad

    I wonder if rocking his lies is what got him his job. No shame in being an aircraft mechanic. Those things are highly technical…and complex too.

    Dickhead!

    • A Proud Infidel®™ says:

      I have a Neighbor who is a USAF Vietnam Vet and he’s completely candid about what he did over there, an Aircraft Mechanic. Let’s face it, fast movers can’t fly if their birds aren’t maintained!

  5. Comm Center Rat says:

    At first glance his doo rag, black polo shirt, tactical sunglasses, SEAL ballcap, and Trident license plate fooled me into thinking this steely eyed veteran is indeed a SEAL. I got a little suspicious though when I read he did not qualify for the coveted NDSM.

  6. Combat Historian says:

    NOT a 16-year SEAL Sniper. Eric Lee Burris needs to stop double-parking on his own mind and start telling the truth to his own family as well as to everyone else…

  7. Instinct says:

    How I the fuck do assholes like this sleep at night with all those lies?

    Jesus, I was a freaking AQ. I ran around on a flight deck all day and loved the hell out of my job, why lie about it? You served honorable, that’s all that was asked of you.

    Fucking idiots

    • 26Limabeans says:

      “How I the fuck do assholes like this sleep at night”

      With one hand on their tiny dick and the other thumb in their ass.

    • Ex-PH2 says:

      It’s simple, really: they want to tell stories, but they don’t have any stories to tell, so they make stuff up.
      But instead of those sea stories you’d get from spending time at Rosie’s in Olongapo, you watch a few movies, get a hair up your anal sphincter, watch a few more movies, and hey! presto! You get to go back to playing cowboys & Indians like you did when you were a twerpy 6YO.
      It helps if you find gullible people attracted to you. They think that glamour will rub off on them, too.

      • Eo says:

        Spouting off stories has become a red flag to me. I was support personnel. Nothing fancy, no CAR, just an average enlistment.
        I have funny stories, but I still don’t share them much around non-vets because most of them don’t understand half of it anyway. Only the bullshit artists seem to actually enjoy it.

      • Ex-PH2 says:

        The difference between them and you is that if you took all those sea stories of yours and turned them into a novel, especially a comic novel, it would gain an audience on its own.

        Which reminds me to get back to chasing dragons. Later!!!

  8. OldManchu says:

    Fetal alcohol syndrome

  9. Animal says:

    Was the truck’s face concealed to prevent embarrassment to the truck?

  10. An Old Arty Sgt says:

    His daughter posted on Military Phonies and believes he’s a SEAL.
    This is the sad part of all this.. His daughter will find out the truth about her Dad. So sad

    Lexi Burris
    04/10/2019 at 18:31
    I’m his daughter. This entire article is all crap.for example, he served 4 years as a Navy seal, but yes, he did have a total of 16 years in service because you don’t walk in as a Navy Seal. It’s a lot of hard work. Know where you’re information is coming from. I grew up around his retired Navy Seal buddies. I’ve been there, Met a lot of very important people, my dad being one.

  11. Veritas Omnia Vincit says:

    Getting your kids to think you were something other than what you were is the worst. You’re supposed to be the one person they can count on to be honest even when they don’t really want to hear the honest. Once they know you were completely full of shit about most of your life they will no longer think of you the same, and that will affect how they trust other family members long after you’re dead.

    Nice job shit head.

    • OldManchu says:

      It’s going to break her heart. She obviously looks up to him greatly. What a dick.

      • Mustang Major says:

        She may qualify for “second order stolen valor” by claiming her dad is a SEAL while knowing that he isn’t.

        • Veritas Omnia Vincit says:

          That largely depends on how she acts once she sees the actual data in front of her…I could understand the reluctance to believe anything posted online.

          Images can be manipulated to make someone look like a liar, she will need to see an FOIA of her own I suspect before realizing he’s full of shit.

          She has no reason to believe or trust an anonymous group of online stolen valor hunters.

      • rgr769 says:

        I am wondering how she can claim her father served in the Navy for 20 years but only achieved the lofty rank of E-4. Someone needs to explain the up or out rule to her, irrespective of the SEAL claims. Someone should show her his record of assignments which prove that, except for boot camp and A school, his four years were served as a reservist.

    • 26Limabeans says:

      After my dad passed I got his records.
      Everything he ever told me was right there where it should be.
      Even the part about losing pay for a sunburn.

      I am sorry for this guy’s family.
      But if it takes sock puppeting to drive the truth home then let it be so.

      • Mike says:

        I had a 1SG in the Old Guard who went after a couple of guys with “self inflicted wound” Article 15’s for sunburn back in the ’70s. Seems they cooked themselves and were unable to put uniforms on for a Monday morning formation.

        • ChipNASA says:

          Remember the story about my friend good Old “Okinawa Banana Show” Marty?
          Yeah, 1985, went to the beach… Marty liked to run around *naked*, we didn’t care.
          He got his junk and surrounding area sun burned and had to be put on quarters for 3 days.

          He got a LOC and they docked his pay for the three days.
          “Damaging Government Property.”

          There’s a dick joke someplace there but I’m straining my brain too hard on it.

          • HT3 '83-'87 says:

            The being sun burned ain’t no joke. Also deployed in the Med in Mid-Summer ’85, some MS booter was sunning himself on the 0-4 level w/o sun screen and got his sorry ass cooked (no pun intended) which lead to a temporary ban on sunbathing. I don’t recall if he got any NJP, but you’d see him around the passageways walking oh-so-gingerly. Another guy caused another ban because he sun bathing on the helo flight deck while we getting mid-deployment maintenance at a Naval Base in Golcuck, Turkey. Apparently, going all RHCP with only a sock on your junk gets the local in a tizzy.

  12. Harry says:

    “I grew up around his retired Navy Seal buddies” says Lexi Burress. I wonder how many of them are lying-ass phonies…

    • HMC Ret says:

      My thoughts, also. He must have done a lot of research to pass among real deal SEALs. Maybe those real deal, some or all, were bogus as well. Been my experience from this site and observations from working at the VA that posers will protect posers. I guess there is strength in fakery.

      This guy? By his actions he has thrown his family under the bus. Don’t know how he can regain his family’s trust. Probably can’t.

      You are one dumb MoFo.

  13. ChipNASA says:

    OK Two things……

    NOW HEAR THIS!!! These two items in the thread are now being added to the The Continent of Insults®™

    Dave Hardin
    1. “worse than a crotch tick” is getting added

    26Limabeans
    2. “How I the fuck do assholes like this sleep at night?
    With one hand on their tiny dick and the other thumb in their ass.” is getting added as well.

    THAT IS ALL!!!

    (And thank you, as always, for your generous contributions.)

    • 5th/77th FA says:

      He’s so much of a dickhead he takes Viagra thru a nasal spray.

      • 26Limabeans says:

        A few month’s ago I read an article about a guy that experimented by snorting 50 mg of the stuff. He was looking for a faster way to get results without going thru the liver, short of injection.
        He got the intended effect but nearly died coughing up his swollen lung tissue.

      • ChipNASA says:

        “He’s so much of a dickhead he takes Viagra thru a nasal spray, And he’s still limp.”

        This too is getting added to the The Continent of Insults®™

    • Mason says:

      Well while you’ve got it out, I nominate Eric “never was a Navy SEAL” Burris for deployment of The Continent of Insults®™

      • ChipNASA says:

        I have a request for the The Continent of Insults®™ . It’s a little dusty.

        Do I have a “Second” as per the Roberts Rules of TAH?

        • Ex-PH2 says:

          I 4th it and be damned to ye!!!!

          • Ex-PH2 says:

            Oh, and “AYE, AYE, AYE” Happy now?

            • ChipNASA says:

              Alright, that certainly counts.
              I never really expect you guys to fail me once the coveted The Continent of Insults®™ has been requested.

              “Excuse me while I whip this out and *DICKSLAP* old Eric Lee Burris right where it counts. ”

              The Continent of Insults®™
              (aka, “This Ain’t Hell” Thesaurus)
              FIRE IN THE HOLE!!!!
              TACTICAL NUCLEAR ROUND OUT!!!!
              THREE PASS AIRCRAFT BOMB RUN!!!!!
              DANGER CLOSE!!!!
              MOPP LEVEL 4!!!
              TAKE COVER!!!!!
              …. Eric (Dick) Lee (Not worth a squirt of pee) Burris (Bird Piss)…HEY DICKLESS WONDER, We all hope you read this and come back here and try to defend your actions, but, you won’t because, YOU’RE A STRAIGHT UP COWARD, NOT A SEAL vile, flaming piece of skunk shit, ALLEGEDLY, but not confirmed or proven, but in some people’s opinion, works balls, tickles taint and tongue punches hobo’s crusty fart boxes all, I Guess, while being a syphilitic, turd-sucking feces factory, HOLY Baby Ape Shit Breath, Bitch-ass Fuckstick guzzler, pile infested, onion-eyed flapmouthed butt-bailiff, “Fowl” mouthed Chicken Fucking Chickenfucker, You flaccid piece of tofu, Simply a fart in life waiting to be fabreezed away, moral equivalent of pond scum, THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS A WALKING TURD, inflamed, “Towel boy” in a gay bath house, DILLY DILLY!!, Ambulatory verbal dissembling anus, Fucking one cell spermatozoon with a tiny flagella, gaping giant ass walking fungus shit nugget, Bag of seasoned dog shit, Cambodian cunt sauce, he deserves to have his private parts gnawed by angry badgers, Anyone who ever loved you was wrong, bucket of ass chum, Poopy Headed ball working asshole, JERK OFF !!, Soup Sandwich, if you Mom would have known you were going to turn out like this, she’d have prayed for a miscarriage, Diaper-Sniper, you’re such a pussy, when you get a haircut they charge you for a bikini wax, suck a big diseased gorilla dick and open those ass cheeks for the bull elephant that has been eyeing your lying ass, Poster-child for post birth abortion, Testicle face, This twat waffle is dumber than a bucket of goat piss, I pray thou shalt be pursued into the mountains by sex-mad baboons, O thou creature of the pit!, If you are married, The only thing your wife wants for Christmas is a folded flag, Dick Swallowing Jerk Wad Spooge Sampling cum gobbling parasitic infection bunghole tonguer, Klootviool, Dude–even your balls are made of pussy, should be ass raped and tea-bagged, at the same time, by a Rabid Rhinoceros, you were the kid that had to sit alone at lunchtime, you’re the afterbirth that slithered out from your mother’s filth, you have always been picked last, you are a puck shot, catcher’s mitt double dribble field goal miss, you are the trash bag after a barracks/frat house party, the Stanley Cup could be your Mom’s dildo, I wish you were an EOD training power point presentation. Not the cool, highly trained bad ass EOD guys, the recipient, He’s more fucked up than a spotted Zebra, shirt-lifter, This guy stepped on his dick so hard it made mine hurt, when your Mom was pregnant with you, the dry cleaner used to charge her double for extra coat hangers. She had bad aim, If this wasn’t so sad, it would be as funny as watching a monkey try to fuck a football, I’m surprised he didn’t award himself a Purple Heart for stepping on his dick., Anus tonguing shitslurping fuckwitted hemorrhoid munching dick lips wanktoaster, pud-knuckling pus-nuts, farting dive bubble cock gobbling Pigfucker, lientery steatorrhea, sperm burping dickchops, Sloshing bucket of Hippo Diarrhea, short strand DNA ‘tard, a bathroom selfie loser, fake “death stare” makes you look like a semen sucking cum vampire on his way to a flying J truck stop hobo ball sac buffet, Cuntosaurus Rex, Bulbous Bleeding Batrachivorous Butthole Burrito,
              This pissant is such a genius of monumental proportions he can skullfuck his own asshole, You man meat munching, spunk bubble blowing butt sponge, You are a disease, worse than a crotch tick, you puerile, one-handed, slack-jawed, drooling, meatslapper, Boy, you couldn’t lead a fresh turd down the bowl, Thinks that he is in the “dark” secret ops, not realizing that he has his head up his ass, You were born stupid and had a prolapse, In need of an appointment with a brass-knuckles Amateur Dentist, exposure to diseased posers is also known as “the Result of Cyclospora” with * “Symptoms of cyclospora include diarrhea and frequent, sometimes explosive bowel movements, according to the CDC.” I say, I say, That boy’s about as sharp as a sack o’ wet mice, Dear fucking 8 pound 6 ounce baby Jesus on a cement tricycle, banjo eyed, insignificant and inconsequentially ignorant imbecilic idiot, single strand DNA refugee from a blow job, not worthy to lick taint lint off my cats backside, Unable to prevail against his one brained celled activity taking him over, so he types, talks, acts as if a retarded ghost possessed him. dickwad that can’t make a good seal on Tupperware, Buttcrackiula, tit, Oh, fuck you sideways with a roll of horse liniment coated concertina wire…you sorry, miserable, posing, shit eating goat fucker, You look like the product of an orgy at a family reunion, got-damn cum drop, You’re funnier than a sock full of frogs and tougher than a jar of marshmallow crème, Sharmouta, hey douche bag, I bet your ass is jealous of the shit that comes out of your mouth, sniveling, codpiece licking toilet seat sniffer, as worthless as a Toyota airbag, lying bucket of Chihuahua shit, taintpimple, Pillow bitin pickle smoocher, meat-gazing walrus fart hamster queef that should have stayed a tittyfuck cumstain in the back seat of an AMC Pacer, Bowl of ass soup, Festering fuckwart on a sewer rat’s ass, I heard you volunteered to go to the Middle East to take on terrorists…dressed as a goat, I believe you to be one of the few, proud pieces of shit that flies won’t fuck on, You’re not the dumbest person on the planet, but you sure better hope he doesn’t die, needle dick bug fucker, wad of fungus on a pile of roach turd, Drongo, Satan even said about you, “Boy is this guy a DICK!, Sparklepony, Toilet weasel, pigshit fungus, grubby little dick-beater, You grotty wanking oik artless base-court apple-john, Connoisseur ,worthless, Vice Admiral of the Narrow Seas, Blows winos behind bus stops for a nickel and gives change, jejeongsin-iya?, whore-hopping fecal wart, Soppspiste Pitbulkukkforhud, stench-ridden, Some drink from the fountain of knowledge; you only gargled, shiftless, monkey-buggerer, petrified shit biscuit, More worthless than rubber lips on a woodpecker or tits on a boar hog, ignoble itching buttcrack, You’re the reason God created Irritable Bowel Syndrome, moldy bowl of ratshit, would wear Richard Simmons’ used jockstrap as a facemask, lickspittle, useless bag of monkey fuck, dickbutt, rectum circling colon goblin, Asshole casserole, Vafanculo, Nut hugger, People like you are the reason God doesn’t talk to us anymore, salad tosser, gonorrheatic urethral cliff diver, smeerlap, fud, rancid floor buffer wax spreader, both of your Grandmothers should have had an abortion, just in case, I’ve seen bigger wieners on a cocktail plate!, You look like something I’d draw with my left hand, Mayor Grundle Butter of Scrotumburg and Anusville, waste of oxygen, Grandstanding cunt, prickwrinkler, Holy cupcake munching monkeys, clitwart, cuntscab, Fuck you, you nutless chickenfuck cocksucking rat-bastard piece of roach shit! Eat a whole fucking ConEx full of dicks!, anal sphincter canyon yodeling phallic squeezer, numbnuts, malodorous odiferous felonious fido fucker, snowball, Coprophagous fop, Gonorrhea breath, swizzle tits, giggling beerflecked canker blossom, how did you survive infancy, rectal rapee, GonnoSyphaHerpaClapAIDS Patient Zero monkey buggerer, ball-tickling & ball gargling bullshiat artist, R2-Dildo, You suck dick for beer money and you don’t even drink beer, secret squirrel masturbation specialist, hand in your badge, Adolf, you fart repeatedly just to make yourself smell better, spunk-trumpet, Bakrauf, face down ass up weak kneed pillow biter,
              Wait, of all the lucky sperms that came outta your daddy, you’re the one that WON??, He’s so much of a dickhead he takes Viagra thru a nasal spray, and he’s still limp, How I the fuck do assholes like this sleep at night? With one hand on their tiny dick and the other thumb in their ass, Holy shit, maybe a “buggerer of little boys”, rottencrotched, rump wrangling, colostomy bag curator, A butter knife amongst razor blades, Rusty Trombone Virtuoso, he is the kinda guy who likes meeting up with two strange men so they can sword fight in his mouth, he’s the kind of guy you’d find hanging out around highway rest areas because he’s frequenting the public bathrooms trying to gargle marbles for change, culo de chongo, booger eating fuckbucket, Lemon Party-lusting, Pissflap, fucknuckles, is about as real as a Civil War Issue polyester blanket, Menstrual quimsquirt, you’re as useful as Anne Frank’s Drum Set, overzealous polyp burglar, poser quim squirt, bed wetting, follows in Victorious Felder’s bovine excrement -filled boots, I wanna get a running start and drop kick him right in the ‘ol yogurt gun, Fustilarian, Knobgobble, prancing pony penis puffer, Likes to turn his mouth into a day care center with guys baby gravy behind the local truck stop, I hope his rectum is popped so hard, he will achieve liftoff on Mr. Tiny’s launch pad, less popular than a Cheese and Veggie Omelet MRE, You are so full of shit, your ears stink, I hope your wife brings a date to your funeral, butt-pirate, as popular as an SBD fart in church on a packed house Sunday, you should get dorked in the squeakhole with the Barbed Cock of Satan, toadstool slime-inhaling dick-drizzling sludge, putrid barrel of fermenting manatee prostatic fluid, prodigious jenkem huffer, You’re a dirty coffee mug on a Monday morning filled to the brim with steaming frothy panther piss, Asparagus-dick, as fucked up as an opossum eating shit out of a hairbrush, Champion Jailhouse Baloney Pony Rider, You’re dumber than snake mittens, Wooden dildo, assplow, Piss Whistle, moron, Poodle Raper, cunt fart, Prevaricating orally diarrhetic sphincter mouth, lintlicker, Wino sphincter/ballsack coinesseur, Cock Bagel and Dick Doughnut, Stronzo, Pie-Faced Crotch Pheasant, Road apple, Mule muffins, Buffalo bagels, Beaver biscuits, pony pucks & Pigeon pellets (Shout out to M*A*S*H Col. Potter) , Straight Up Stupid Motherfucker, manpleaser, this buttmunch needs to eat out the rotten asshole of a road-killed skunk, baby unit, one eyed snake charmer, People like this make me wanna hatefuck a dumpster, on fire and then give sloppy seconds to a menstruating porcupine , Shit-Slot Cosmonaut, Proper Daft Cunt, you thought you had a hair on your dick until it peed, zombies would take one look at you and walk the other direction, Do you know who has more friends and is more popular than you? The Shit Pool at Kandahar Airfield Afghanistan, he has less brains than a bony eared assfish if he thought he would continue to get away with his bullshit, Fair suck of the sav, is so unimaginably and extraordinarily vapid and mindlessly stupid that he could get lost in an elevator, Meretricious, you’ll never be the man your mother is, Odious Twonk, he is just a rock with lips rocking the dick head look, likes to suck the turds out of rabid dogs bungholes, He looks like the kind of guy that really needs to take a bath…with a toaster. baby cave, analconda, Grade A chode yodeler, tittilating scrotalator pole smoker, Vaginal Sand Fairy, Drollenpijper, wide open mouth pivot man in a circle jerk, feral abacus, leg humper, You look like you were conceived through anal, meadow muffin, ax wound drippings, you’re such a loser, when you spank your little wee-wee, your hand falls asleep, horse squeeze Ball Cheese, you were born after your Dad cream-pied her asshole then finger fucked her vagina, your “heroic “ career is less believable than UFOs, Bigfoot and the Loch Ness Monster, you are the poster child for ED, when I want to terrorize my children, I tell YOU are under their bed, when I saw this sperm receptacle, soggy biscuit eater, my eyes rolled so hard I saw my own brain stem, I cannot believe how incredibly stupid you are. I mean rock-hard stupid. Dehydrated-rock-hard stupid.

              • ChipNASA says:

                (Guys, please unbold after “The Continent of Insults®™
                (aka, “This Ain’t Hell” Thesaurus)” (Rolls my own eyes. I had an html fart)

              • ChipNASA says:

                Stupid, so stupid it goes way beyond the stupid we know into a whole different dimension of stupid. You are trans-stupid stupid. Meta-stupid. Stupid collapsed on itself so far that even the neutrons have collapsed. Stupid gotten so dense that no intellect can escape. Singularity stupid. Blazing hot mid-day sun on Mercury stupid, you emit more stupid in one second than our entire galaxy emits in a year. Quasar stupid, nothing in our universe can really be this stupid. Perhaps this is some primordial fragment from the original big bang of stupid. Some pure essence of a stupid so uncontaminated by anything else as to be beyond the laws of physics that we know, Schlumpadinka, wazzock, Tampon Tunnel, used toilet paper-sniffing Turbo knob vacuum of a meat gazer, terminal crotch infection, asshat, roach turd-munching shit-for-brains, a black hole would spit you out, the founding fathers said all men are created equal….except for you, you make scientists contemplate the possibility that there’s a negative IQ number, if you an 2 other guys ran a race together, you’d come in fourth, dick pickle, gòrach pìos de cac, It looks like he smeared super glue on his lip and chin and went down on Whoopi Goldberg’s cootchie, You make PTSD/TBI look like a state fair, a 3 ring circus and Disneyland all rolled into one, likes to gargle with a mouthful of unborn crib midgets, He can shit and fall in it as far as I am concerned(This one is for the Ladies and Medical Staff) this prancing fairy is about as popular as a failed Episiotomy with a 4th degree perineal tear, wanker, herpes-ridden dung beetle target, feejackapeesack, first volunteer for being part of a jailhouse human centipede, bunghole warrior, cockwomble, bread loaf end slice, should eat a nice steaming pile of monkey shit you ass clown, looks like hammered dog shit, Your mother may have told you that you could be anything you wanted, but a douchebag wasn’t what she meant, If Mr. Rogers were alive, he’d piss on your grave, helmet wearing short bus riding window licker, Head paddler in the douche canoe, Uncle Fucker, more ate up than a chocolate dildo in a crowded gay bar, shitbag, dipstickus giganticus, Humpty Dumpty cleanup man after the fleet visits Naples, Herp-Burger, poofter, intergalactic cunt muffin, knob gobbling, fimicolous galactic Jackoff, Deputy executive assistant jizz mopper in training, chronic hemorrhoid, stugatz, inbred, toe-jam from an infected Filipino hooker that specializes in foot jobs, tortured turnip turd, Sea Donkey, festering pool of anal leakage, your penis lives in eternal darkness, I’d hate to see your toilet, retardus maximus, Microcephalic Toad Licker, can go suck a fat baby’s dick, steaming rat-felching bucket of moldy monkey fuck, Bellicose ball gnashing raper of babies with rabies, Pecker-puffing pickle licker, catcher not pitcher, bawbag, about as useful as a white crayon, Arschloch, impotent koekeloeren, slaptard, couldn’t even be trained in my AFSC in the USAF to suck farts out of C-5 seat cushions, mumpsimus, reverse dirty sanchez lover, scunner, kutomba wewe, Cryptosporidium-ridden tire tosser, fudgepacker, turbo douche & enema nozzle, mental midget, likes to molest small farm animals, dead and alive, is a hemorrhoid, 100 retarded monkeys could jerk off in a stagnant swamp and generate a better life form than you, You are about as useful as a knitted condom, if I had the taste of you in my mouth, I’d lick the taint of a dead rotting water buffalo in the Vietnamese jungle just to get the taste out, just to fix your shit, you could make a Jew deny the Holocaust, you are the reason Jesus can’t play peek-a-boo, he has holes in his hands, you are a 0 EPR/OPR, you are worse than a Dishonorable Discharge….from your Mom’s vagina, Massive, back alley, bucket of schlong fuck juice, cockalorum cum-guzzling gutter slut, Dalton Coldiron’s bunny-butt buddy atomic sphincter goblin, If you stuck your brain up a gnat’s ass, it would look like a BB in a boxcar, Jackanape, Fuck Tart, Sitzpinkler, lispian, pussytits, Milksop, you’re such an embarrassment to your family and your father is so ashamed of you, he’d refuse a free blowjob out of fear of further spilling his seed,
                you suck so bad, AIDS and Cancer have nightmares about you, your shit is about as funny as Anne Frank, Helen Keller and Terri Schiavo having an orgy in the showers at Auschwitz, you suck so bad, puppies, kittens and babies hate you, you are so loathsome, looks like the kind of guy who lets his wife gets her shit pushed in by Mr. Ouch while he watches, Gandhi would ass rape you for giggles, you are about as welcome as a yeast infection, hemorrhoids, gonorrhea, syphilis, chlamydia, genital wards and herpes, you’re one of the reasons Trump is President, you make God want a do-over, You vacuous, toffee-nosed malodorous pervert, pillock, puss soaked jackwagon, waste of trace elements and water, Jizztissue, knob breath dick biscuit, Pettifogger, Bunghole Baby,Rear Admiral of the Butt Piracy, donkey raping shit-eater, twatface, pedicabo ego vos et irrumabo it, may he lay a lip lock on the snotty end of a moose cock,butt munch, deep sea crotch lobster, man of the night in a large animal bordello, I bet you’re the kind of guy that would fuck your own mother in the ass and not even have the goddamn common courtesy to give her a reach-around (Thanks R. Lee Ermey, R.I.P. ), DEFINITELY Not ever a Navy SEAL, LIAR, FRAUD, FAKE, should extract himself from the *legit* members of the UDT/SEAL Association, most riki-tik, Oh and also NOT a Sniper, and probably not a part of any Search and Rescue team or group since everything else is a lie, was NOT in for 16 years (WOW *another* lie?!?!) did have 4 years of honorable service BUT YOU JUST SHIT ALL OVER THAT PAL!!, Get rid of that TRIDENT off your fucking truck and donate all your bullshit Trident clothes to Goodwill, and finally you should fess up to the UDT/SEAL Association, your family and friends and anyone *else* you rocked the lie to, TOTALLY a retarded, soul patch ball dusting, burn pit of worthlessness, you know the old saying “don’t throw the baby out with the bath water?” You would be the exception, he can go fuck a hill of dildos, you’re so fugly, you could make the Sun go down and not want to come up again, you make people that know you, want ass cancer, you make Hillary Clinton’s vagina look attractive, should be blowing everyone in cell block D and taking it up the ass, simultaneously from everyone in cell block C, You fucking LAND WALRUS, shit snorting stain on Hillary Clinton’s yeast infected kootchie covers, you’re lucky we don’t dress you up in drag, drop your ass off somewhere in the Middle East and let an entire battalion of ISIS soldiers and supporters butt rape you until you’re turned inside out, remember that story in the news a while back about a guy that was arrested for fucking his girlfriend’s dog that had been dead for a few days, in front of a daycare center? Yeah, you’re worse than that guy, you make child rape and crib death seem funny, you are such a fuckgasim, you’d leave Don Rickles speechless, you could make Goodwill, the Salvation Army and the Red Cross give you the finger, You make your own Mother cry on Mother’s Day, you’re the reason proctologists are a thing, seeing you frolicking around in all your finery makes me understand why Abba wrote the song Dancing Queen, I’d rather watch AFRTS than see this guy’s shit on the Internet, if you were a planet, you’d be Uranus, YOU are the reason monkeys throw poop, you stupid toilet mint licker, Hitler wishes he had you as a mentor because now he feels like a failure, Ball Basting Boy Wondor, What an oily little meatgazer, planetary level atomic flaming douchebag, Santorium, lying shitbag wanna-be fucknozzle cleaner, Impacted breaching turtle head, Rumpleforeskin, fuckstain skidmark on the underwear of life, anal bum cover (LOL SNL Jeopardy), taint cookie, Mr. Men’s Room Wide Stance toe tapping glory hole hero, Fartleberry, Some NCO Should have beat you within an inch of your life, insult to humanity, I hope his ego hits the floor like a turd from a tall cows ass, shit-filled meatsack, masturbates to videos of Jar-Jar Binks, YOU’RE THE REASON ALIENS COME TO EARTH IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT AND STICK THINGS UP OUR ASSES BECAUSE EVEN ADVANCED CIVILIZATIONS CAN’T FIGURE YOUR SHIT OUT, walking shart shooter, minge,
                moldy dingleberry on a roadkill swamp rat’s ass, test subject for Preparations A thru G, Remedy critch, Gnard gargling queefsquirt, I heard you were created via frozen embryo, you must have thawed, what’s gross, a truckload of dead babies, what’s grosser than gross, a truckload of dead babies with a live one in the middle trying to eat its way out, what is more disgusting than that? You, stupid enough to try to sandpaper to a wildcat’s ass in a phone booth, Handgallop, twatscicle, Obamawad, tool, bint, sleezebag, weaksauce, Gobshite, fuck hole, Pillsbury Dough Bitch, Should NOT be around WOMEN OR CHILDREN, touches himself inappropriately, Turd-Burglar, rimjobber, turd lizard of a roadkill opossum-humper, cum-dumpster, Inbred buck-toothed slimy toadstool on a Swamp Donkey turd, Useless mangy crotch-dropping, needle dick buttfucker, Putz, rectal inspector, this swollen, sweltering manhole should be infected with herpegonasyphilaids, ferger, Sheep tits, gonad, queefer, chicken shit, choad, Puppy fucker, dopus, Blue Falcon and Blue Waffle, Fuck Apple with mold, twizzletits, tallywacker, Bozack, Fiction-flinging Richard Gere’s Ass Gerbil Felcher, dingleberry circling ass buzzard, bitch, Saprophyte, ATM, pap smear, bukakke glazed shitmitten, Dandy prat, Tazmanian Dorkwad rat fucking, shit-sucking warthog’s asshole, gimp, bescumber, coccydynia, you lying sack of mosquito, Siberian bag of cum-stained hadji sheep shit”, mangina micropeen, Fuckrag, Syphilitic Turd Burglar, possibly likes to pick his teeth with his OWN used catheters, Hircismus, cheat, You couldn’t make a point if someone gave you a pencil sharpener, should be pounded in the poop hole with a turret of a M1 Abrams, and then fired a WP round therein, pope-fondling, turbo apeshit crazy, Cacafuego, Cock-juggling *Pussy* thundercunt.
                If any of this offends you, I’m sorry. If something here *doesn’t* offend you, I’m not trying hard enough!
                We now include the NEW & IMPROVED
                OFFICIAL TAH BINGO CARD®™
                /FREE with every deployment of an equal or greater value
                The Continent of Insults®™
                https://imgur.com/nGqi3aR

                FUCK YOU, ASS HAMSTER!!!
                Can I get an AMEN?! (Or your choice of exclamation/interjection.)
                Here endeth the lesson.

    • Comm Center Rat says:

      The 26Limabeans quote had me LMAO! I even told it to my spousal unit although she generally doesn’t approve of “barracks humor.” However, she did crack a small smile for this line. Kudos to 26 Limabeans for a hall of fame worthy addition to The Continent of Insults®™

  14. Mick says:

    ‘Sniper’

    — sigh —

    It’s always ‘sniper’. Always.

    And I’d also like to know what ‘Search and Rescue team’ he thinks that he was on.

  15. Jon Martin says:

    So no motorcycle vest? I’m saddened even more 💯
    People please fix yourself before trying to help others? You can’t seriously jump into Military affairs as a civilian and not expect your shit to be drug through the yard, so trim your yard up and be honest.

  16. Andy11M says:

    So just how slimy do you have to be to slip through the cracks and make it into a real SEAL organization?

    • Blake Morgan says:

      I have two theories on how this happened but I could be wrong.

      1) He admired SEALs from his time in the Navy. Maybe even held some fascination. When he got the chance to work with them he jumped at it. Over time, he got tired of explaining to people he was NOT a SEAL, especially at events where he was manning some of the SEAL educational displays. Nobody is going to ask you if you were a SEAL, it was most likely assumed. He perhaps just got tired of being proactive about setting the record straight and eventually took no responsibility for people’s assumptions. After all, why should he? Over the years, he learned that a well-placed sequence of words would lead to reinforcing the assumption that he was a SEAL. One thing lead to another and here we are.

      The alternate version of the chicken or the egg theory is…

      2) He’s a liar and always has been.

  17. HMCS(FMF) ret says:

    NOW HEAR THIS! NOW HEAR THIS!

    ERIC LEE BURRIS qualified as a “SEAL” by fellitating a pinnaped.

    ERIC LEE BURRIS qualified as a “SNIPER” while working at Brucies Bath House (Entrance in the Rear) as a Junior Associate Towel Boy.

    ERIC LEE BURRIS took a shit all over his four year of honorable service.

    THAT IS ALL

  18. A Proud Infidel®™ says:

    Eric Lee Burris WAS NEVER a USN SEAL.
    Eric Lee Burris DID legitimately serve in the USN Reserve and shit all over it by lying.
    Eric Lee Burris apparently has family members conned into believing his lies.
    Eric Lee Burris looks like he also enjoys doing tricks behind the dumpster at Flying J truck stops.
    Eric Lee Burris looks like someone who prowls highway rest areas looking for a date.
    Eric Lee Burris is indeed “Double parked in his own mind”.
    Eric Lee Burris likely used his fake SEAL persona to become an Apprentice Towel Boy at Brucie’s Bath House (Entrance in Rear).
    Eric Lee Burris would have been FAR better off if he hadn’t lied about his service.
    Eric Lee Burris has a helluva ballsack tickler on his chin!
    Eric Lee Burris isn’t worth even a squirt of a real USN SEAL’s piss.
    Eric Lee Burris looks like a regular customer at The Blue Oyster.
    Eric Lee Burris rolled the SV Dice and came up with “snake eyes”!
    Eric Lee Burris fucketh himself with Stolen Valor.
    Eric Lee Burris looks like he’s ready for “Man Love Thursday” with that do-rag on his head and a Shemagh around his neck.
    Eric Lee Burris is not unlike a teacup poodle pretending to be a Rottweiler.
    Eric Lee Burris needs to man up and end his con game.
    Eric Lee Burris is finding out about The Power of Google®™ and will continue to do so and Eric Lee Burris will find out that THE INTERNET IS FOREVER.

    How copy,
    ((((OVER))))

    • Duane says:

      API, Do I read you correct:
      Eric Lee Burris WAS NEVER a USN SEAL.
      Eric Lee Burris DID legitimately serve in the USN Reserve and shit all over it by lying.
      Eric Lee Burris apparently has family members conned into believing his lies.
      Eric Lee Burris looks like he also enjoys doing tricks behind the dumpster at Flying J truck stops.
      Eric Lee Burris looks like someone who prowls highway rest areas looking for a date.
      Eric Lee Burris is indeed “Double parked in his own mind”.
      Eric Lee Burris likely used his fake SEAL persona to become an Apprentice Towel Boy at Brucie’s Bath House (Entrance in Rear).
      Eric Lee Burris would have been FAR better off if he hadn’t lied about his service.
      Eric Lee Burris has a helluva ballsack tickler on his chin!
      Eric Lee Burris isn’t worth even a squirt of a real USN SEAL’s piss.
      Eric Lee Burris looks like a regular customer at The Blue Oyster.
      Eric Lee Burris rolled the SV Dice and came up with “snake eyes”!
      Eric Lee Burris fucketh himself with Stolen Valor.
      Eric Lee Burris looks like he’s ready for “Man Love Thursday” with that do-rag on his head and a Shemagh around his neck.
      Eric Lee Burris is not unlike a teacup poodle pretending to be a Rottweiler.
      Eric Lee Burris needs to man up and end his con game.
      Eric Lee Burris is finding out about The Power of Google®™ and will continue to do so and Eric Lee Burris will find out that THE INTERNET IS FOREVER.

    • Commissioner Wretched says:

      API, I copy the following:

      Eric Lee Burris WAS NEVER a USN SEAL.
      Eric Lee Burris DID legitimately serve in the USN Reserve and shit all over it by lying.
      Eric Lee Burris apparently has family members conned into believing his lies.
      Eric Lee Burris looks like he also enjoys doing tricks behind the dumpster at Flying J truck stops.
      Eric Lee Burris looks like someone who prowls highway rest areas looking for a date.
      Eric Lee Burris is indeed “Double parked in his own mind”.
      Eric Lee Burris likely used his fake SEAL persona to become an Apprentice Towel Boy at Brucie’s Bath House (Entrance in Rear).
      Eric Lee Burris would have been FAR better off if he hadn’t lied about his service.
      Eric Lee Burris has a helluva ballsack tickler on his chin!
      Eric Lee Burris isn’t worth even a squirt of a real USN SEAL’s piss.
      Eric Lee Burris looks like a regular customer at The Blue Oyster.
      Eric Lee Burris rolled the SV Dice and came up with “snake eyes”!
      Eric Lee Burris fucketh himself with Stolen Valor.
      Eric Lee Burris looks like he’s ready for “Man Love Thursday” with that do-rag on his head and a Shemagh around his neck.
      Eric Lee Burris is not unlike a teacup poodle pretending to be a Rottweiler.
      Eric Lee Burris needs to man up and end his con game.
      Eric Lee Burris is finding out about The Power of Google®™ and will continue to do so and Eric Lee Burris will find out that THE INTERNET IS FOREVER.

      Checking for clarification. How copy? ((OVER))

  19. Sarge says:

    A Proud Infidel®™,

    I copy:

    Eric Lee Burris WAS NEVER a USN SEAL.
    Eric Lee Burris DID legitimately serve in the USN Reserve and shit all over it by lying.
    Eric Lee Burris apparently has family members conned into believing his lies.
    Eric Lee Burris looks like he also enjoys doing tricks behind the dumpster at Flying J truck stops.
    Eric Lee Burris looks like someone who prowls highway rest areas looking for a date.
    Eric Lee Burris is indeed “Double parked in his own mind”.
    Eric Lee Burris likely used his fake SEAL persona to become an Apprentice Towel Boy at Brucie’s Bath House (Entrance in Rear).
    Eric Lee Burris would have been FAR better off if he hadn’t lied about his service.
    Eric Lee Burris has a helluva ballsack tickler on his chin!
    Eric Lee Burris isn’t worth even a squirt of a real USN SEAL’s piss.
    Eric Lee Burris looks like a regular customer at The Blue Oyster.
    Eric Lee Burris rolled the SV Dice and came up with “snake eyes”!
    Eric Lee Burris fucketh himself with Stolen Valor.
    Eric Lee Burris looks like he’s ready for “Man Love Thursday” with that do-rag on his head and a Shemagh around his neck.
    Eric Lee Burris is not unlike a teacup poodle pretending to be a Rottweiler.
    Eric Lee Burris needs to man up and end his con game.
    Eric Lee Burris is finding out about The Power of Google®™ and will continue to do so and Eric Lee Burris will find out that THE INTERNET IS FOREVER.

    Loud and clear!

  20. An Airdale MM Snipe and he didn’t have to show a fresh air chit.

  21. Lmn0351 says:

    Ive been coming to tah for years.it fucking amazes me that these assholes think they will get away with their lies.eventually it will catch up to them. Eric Lee Burris you phoney …you suck

  22. Green Thumb says:

    What a felcher.

  23. Ex-PH2 says:

    Waiting for his daughter to show up, IF that’s really her posting a protest on Military Phony about this discovery.

  24. 5jc says:

    Someone posted at MP, that he was fired by Daniel Defense to represent them at Shot Show. If that was based on his SV claims he could be looking at Federal charges.

  25. SFC D says:

    TAH SW COPIES LICKEN CHICKEN

    Eric Lee Burris WAS NEVER a USN SEAL.
    Eric Lee Burris DID legitimately serve in the USN Reserve and shit all over it by lying.
    Eric Lee Burris apparently has family members conned into believing his lies.
    Eric Lee Burris looks like he also enjoys doing tricks behind the dumpster at Flying J truck stops.
    Eric Lee Burris looks like someone who prowls highway rest areas looking for a date.
    Eric Lee Burris is indeed “Double parked in his own mind”.
    Eric Lee Burris likely used his fake SEAL persona to become an Apprentice Towel Boy at Brucie’s Bath House (Entrance in Rear).
    Eric Lee Burris would have been FAR better off if he hadn’t lied about his service.
    Eric Lee Burris has a helluva ballsack tickler on his chin!
    Eric Lee Burris isn’t worth even a squirt of a real USN SEAL’s piss.
    Eric Lee Burris looks like a regular customer at The Blue Oyster.
    Eric Lee Burris rolled the SV Dice and came up with “snake eyes”!
    Eric Lee Burris fucketh himself with Stolen Valor.
    Eric Lee Burris looks like he’s ready for “Man Love Thursday” with that do-rag on his head and a Shemagh around his neck.
    Eric Lee Burris is not unlike a teacup poodle pretending to be a Rottweiler.
    Eric Lee Burris needs to man up and end his con game.
    Eric Lee Burris is finding out about The Power of Google®™ and will continue to do so and Eric Lee Burris will find out that THE INTERNET IS FOREVER.

  26. ChipNASA says:

    There are photos of him on the SEALTWO.org page

    http://www.sealtwo.org/page19.htm

  27. Jeffery D Monroe says:

    I have 3 DD214s and a DD215 and a NG 22 -Active Navy almost 9 years got a voluntary early out 1993 when Bubba Became POTUS and then 2 x OIF Veteran with Alabama National Guard 1st x C Company 1/167th Infantry and 2x x 1143rd Chemical Company and leave it at that.

  28. Daisy Cutter says:

    His Facebook page is no longer up.

    It appears to have been decommissioned.

  29. Andrew Dangerously says:

    “He did serve during a time when most people would not and had a perfectly honorable career that anyone should have been proud of.”

    WTF are you talking about? He did 4 years Navy reserve, no NDSM, no Sea deployment ribbon, no personal awards and got out as an E4.

    Sometimes, the same people who complain about millenials getting participation trophies like to pretend that simply enlisting and showing up for occasional drills is something to be proud of.

  30. Synloy un says:

    You have to feel for the kid;especially since the lies are to no avail.She would love him no more or less if he was a seal or cub scout.Most civilians don’t know the difference anyway.If being loved was dependent on service 99.9% of the population would be loved.Oh.what tangled webs we weave.

  31. Synloy un says:

    I know I messed up that last thought.but it is the last post on this story so noone will read it .Now Im talking to myself

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